29 October 2016 FR:
Hey fellas,
Here's another report of a girl I met through a dating app called Tantan in Chengdu, China.
I met up with Ariel just 2 hours after matching her. She sported a yellow turtle neck sweater, and skinny jeans. Her face was cute, and she had an average body type, neither skinny nor fat, but somewhere in the middle. She had big boobs. I was wearing one of two staple outfits that I have in China. Blue denim jacket, grey skinny ripped jeans, black crew neck top, oiled brown leather boots, and a pendant. We spoke almost entirely in Chinese, with some English thrown into the mix.
We met up at a shopping mall, a 10 minute walk from where I was staying. She approached me by playfully scaring me. I tried to cue introductions, but she seemed very skittish and immediately said "let's go." So no introductions, which was weird. I asked whether she was hungry, and she was slightly. We decided to grab some food. Whilst looking for a restaurant, she said that I looked different compared to my pictures online. She thought that I looked younger. I could tell that she was very shy and a little awkward.
We eventually found a place to eat and we sat down. I picked a seat, but preferred to seat elsewhere and she led us to a private place close to a wall. We then ordered food. She said that she was happy with whatever I wanted to order. Communicating with Ariel was difficult because she didn't speak much English, and my Chinese was terrible. We relied on using translator apps on our phones, which seemed to frustrate her greatly. At one point, she said that it was awkward to communicate using a translator. I insisted that I thought it was kinda cute. My main focus was on building comfort with her. My eyes and smile were warm and welcoming, even though hers were submissive and darting. At one point, I called her out on her shyness. I asked her why this was the case. "Because you're hot." She said she was shy around guys she wasn't familiar with. I reassured her that she didn't need to be shy, and that since we were having dinner together, we were now friends and familiar with each other. She accepted this frame. It turned out Ariel was from Zhangjiajie a place which I was considering visiting. I deep dived her about her hometown and culture. She was in Chengdu to practice dancing which I thought was pretty cool. I asked her about her motivation and ambitions behind dancing. Whenever there were lulls in the conversation, she'd point to the food on the table and say "Eat." It wasn't so much in an authoritative tone, but because she probably felt a little awkward in the silent parts of the conversation. I genuinely thought this was amusing so I smiled to myself whenever she did so. I locked my eyes with her and remained silent in a couple of instances, just gazing into her eyes. She'd do the same back, and would be the first one to break eye contact. She was quite shy to meet my eyes. Whether this eye contact was too much, or effective, I don't really know. We soon realised that we ordered too much food. I wasn't particularly hungry, and she kept complaining that she was fat and so she hesitated to eat the fried rice that was getting cold on the table. We eventually chowed down on most of the remaining food in any case. This joint effort to clear the table seemed to get her feeling more comfortable with me. We eventually finished I wanted to split the bill, which I said in English. I don't think she understood me. She ended up saying something in Chinese, which I didn't understand. So I ended up handing the cash to the cashier, and Ariel didn't reimburse me either. I hardly ever pay for my dates, and I usually demand to at least split the bill, but I wasn't too fussed about paying the full share. I suggested taking a walk. She complied. She also mentioned that she had a dancing lesson soon, so she couldn't stay for too long, so I knew I had some obstacles to overcome about pulling and laying.
We walked towards the lift downstairs, and whilst waiting for the lift, we small talked. I grabbed onto her hand and held onto it for around 10 seconds, breaking the awkward no touch barrier between us. We exited the shopping centre and walked out to the street. "Let's walk that way" I said, and pointed towards the direction of my hostel. She agreed and asked me if I wanted her to walk me back to my hostel, before she left for her dancing lesson. I deflected her suggestion which would have ended up nowhere. I suggested that we should just walk. At one point she said that she was cold, to which I said, "Really? Give me your hand." She rejected my compliance demand, and we kept walking. No big deal. We continued to walked for about 2 minutes and I decisively pointed towards a nearby bench. "Let's sit over there, I'm tired of walking after that big dinner." She agreed.
We sat down, I used this close proximity as an opportunity to physicallg escalate. Soon into sitting down, I looped my arm around hers, and held onto her hand. No resistance. The vibe was definitely now far more intimate. I made mention about how she was shy, which I thought was cute. She mentioned, "In China, girls are shy. They are meant to be shy. It is not good to not be shy around guys." She was talking about girls needing to have reservations about sex and putting out for dudes. I combated this frame by mentioning that girls should be free to do what they like, and if 2 people like each other, they should do whatever they want and feels good, no matter what other people think. We small talked a bit more, and I continued to escalated physically. I had my hands rubbing her thighs, and caressing her hands. After 5 minutes or so, I structured my pull. "It's so cold here, we can go back to my place where it's warmer... my place has a (in English) heater." She asked me what I meant by 'heater' and I translated it for her using my phone. She insisted that she had to go though because she had her dance lesson. I held strong to my frame.
We ended up walking for around 5 minutes back to the hostel. I was proactive prior to leaving my room, and I had the lighting figured out. The 2 bedside lamps provided a seductive ambience to the room. I told her that I didn't like shoes in my room, and told her to remove them. She complied. I hopped onto the bed and told her to join me.
At this point, I can't remember the specifics of what we were talking about too much. I tried to put on my "sweet talk" persona where I act very cute, and sweet, but she didn't seem very receptive to it. This persona was something I was experimenting with with overall positive results. However, this was the first experience I had encountered where the girl didn't seem to enjoy my cute persona so much.
In any case, I persisted with it, and started cuddling her. Eventually I was up close against her face and went in to kiss her. I don't remember how it happened exactly, but I figure it was around the height of emotional levels. She turned her face, so I met with her cheek. She said that in China, people only meant to kiss after knowing each other for a longer time. She seemed to enjoying my company, so I ignored her unhelpful frame. I cheek kissed her some more, breaking up the escalation with the "sweet talk" I was experimenting with. Eventually, she asked me, "You really want to kiss me right?" I don't remember my exact response, but I think I weaved my way around it, to keep the mystery. At one point I was just lying on my back, facing the ceiling and out of nowhere she came for my face and passionately made out with me, tongue and everything for about 1 second. Huh?
After that moment, I escalated into more kissing, which was met with token resistance. I managed to work past it, and we made out heavily. I was pretty passionate, and moaned a little bit. I rubbed my hands around her thighs, and rubbed her pussy through her pants. At one point, her hand grazed against my dick, and I grabbed hold onto her hand and cupped her hands on my dick. Instant hard on. I began to rub her pussy through her pants. After more kissing, I was the first to pull back. In hindsight, I don't know if this was a flaw on my behalf, such that I instead should've escalated further without breaks. In multiple instances I've escalated without breaks straight into sex successfully. Don't know if it is technically bad to have a break when things are already hot and heavy. Curious to hear about your thoughts on this.
Anyway, after the break, she seemed to be pulled out of a trance state and seemed to come back down to earth. I kissed her again, but it wasn't very well received. I then climbed on top of her, and kissed her, which she didn't seem to enjoy. She seemed to get pretty antsy. We fooled around a bit more, and she commented that she was so fat. I then proceeded to kiss her stomach and I reassured her she wasn't. She was probably a spot on average. I told her that I thought her body was very cute. She then asked me whether I liked her boobs, and she pulled up her top, flashing a large juicy pair almost bursting out of her bra. I told her I didn't get a good enough look (because I didn't have my glases) to tell her if I liked them or not and I told her to show me them again. At that point, so went full 180 on me and said she had to go to her dance lesson now. I persisted in getting her to stay, but I was met with a hard no. I accepted the fact she was leaving. She hurriedly packed her things, and left my room, curtly and coldly saying goodbye.
-----
Finishing thoughts:
What I did well:
- I had a strong frame. When it came to pulling and physical escalation, I led strongly and was not phased by her resistance.
- I think my comfort building was pretty good. Initially she was a little on edge around me, but by the time we were in bed, she seemed comfortable. Although I could've done even better with this.
- I think I managed my attainability pretty well. When she qualified her dancing ability to me, I rewarded her, telling her I thought it was really cool. I reassured her that I thought she was cute. I think attainability was especially important, because there was a clear value differential.
- Physical escalation was good mostly.
- I showed her that I was not judgemental and thought that girls should be free to express their sexual desire despite what their culture might think.
What I should've done differently:
- I should not have climbed on top of her when escalating. Especially since she was definitely inexperienced and giving me nervous resistance.
- I could've made her feel more comfortable in bed with me.
- I seemed too eager to see her boobs the second time. I think this combined with me climbing on top of her (given how inexperienced she was) was the reason why she left. Being late for her dance lesson provided even more of a reason to leave.
- I possibly should not have not created a gap between escalating straight from kissing to sex. But I'm not sure on this one.
More reports incoming!
Jeffrey
Hey fellas,
Here's another report of a girl I met through a dating app called Tantan in Chengdu, China.
I met up with Ariel just 2 hours after matching her. She sported a yellow turtle neck sweater, and skinny jeans. Her face was cute, and she had an average body type, neither skinny nor fat, but somewhere in the middle. She had big boobs. I was wearing one of two staple outfits that I have in China. Blue denim jacket, grey skinny ripped jeans, black crew neck top, oiled brown leather boots, and a pendant. We spoke almost entirely in Chinese, with some English thrown into the mix.
We met up at a shopping mall, a 10 minute walk from where I was staying. She approached me by playfully scaring me. I tried to cue introductions, but she seemed very skittish and immediately said "let's go." So no introductions, which was weird. I asked whether she was hungry, and she was slightly. We decided to grab some food. Whilst looking for a restaurant, she said that I looked different compared to my pictures online. She thought that I looked younger. I could tell that she was very shy and a little awkward.
We eventually found a place to eat and we sat down. I picked a seat, but preferred to seat elsewhere and she led us to a private place close to a wall. We then ordered food. She said that she was happy with whatever I wanted to order. Communicating with Ariel was difficult because she didn't speak much English, and my Chinese was terrible. We relied on using translator apps on our phones, which seemed to frustrate her greatly. At one point, she said that it was awkward to communicate using a translator. I insisted that I thought it was kinda cute. My main focus was on building comfort with her. My eyes and smile were warm and welcoming, even though hers were submissive and darting. At one point, I called her out on her shyness. I asked her why this was the case. "Because you're hot." She said she was shy around guys she wasn't familiar with. I reassured her that she didn't need to be shy, and that since we were having dinner together, we were now friends and familiar with each other. She accepted this frame. It turned out Ariel was from Zhangjiajie a place which I was considering visiting. I deep dived her about her hometown and culture. She was in Chengdu to practice dancing which I thought was pretty cool. I asked her about her motivation and ambitions behind dancing. Whenever there were lulls in the conversation, she'd point to the food on the table and say "Eat." It wasn't so much in an authoritative tone, but because she probably felt a little awkward in the silent parts of the conversation. I genuinely thought this was amusing so I smiled to myself whenever she did so. I locked my eyes with her and remained silent in a couple of instances, just gazing into her eyes. She'd do the same back, and would be the first one to break eye contact. She was quite shy to meet my eyes. Whether this eye contact was too much, or effective, I don't really know. We soon realised that we ordered too much food. I wasn't particularly hungry, and she kept complaining that she was fat and so she hesitated to eat the fried rice that was getting cold on the table. We eventually chowed down on most of the remaining food in any case. This joint effort to clear the table seemed to get her feeling more comfortable with me. We eventually finished I wanted to split the bill, which I said in English. I don't think she understood me. She ended up saying something in Chinese, which I didn't understand. So I ended up handing the cash to the cashier, and Ariel didn't reimburse me either. I hardly ever pay for my dates, and I usually demand to at least split the bill, but I wasn't too fussed about paying the full share. I suggested taking a walk. She complied. She also mentioned that she had a dancing lesson soon, so she couldn't stay for too long, so I knew I had some obstacles to overcome about pulling and laying.
We walked towards the lift downstairs, and whilst waiting for the lift, we small talked. I grabbed onto her hand and held onto it for around 10 seconds, breaking the awkward no touch barrier between us. We exited the shopping centre and walked out to the street. "Let's walk that way" I said, and pointed towards the direction of my hostel. She agreed and asked me if I wanted her to walk me back to my hostel, before she left for her dancing lesson. I deflected her suggestion which would have ended up nowhere. I suggested that we should just walk. At one point she said that she was cold, to which I said, "Really? Give me your hand." She rejected my compliance demand, and we kept walking. No big deal. We continued to walked for about 2 minutes and I decisively pointed towards a nearby bench. "Let's sit over there, I'm tired of walking after that big dinner." She agreed.
We sat down, I used this close proximity as an opportunity to physicallg escalate. Soon into sitting down, I looped my arm around hers, and held onto her hand. No resistance. The vibe was definitely now far more intimate. I made mention about how she was shy, which I thought was cute. She mentioned, "In China, girls are shy. They are meant to be shy. It is not good to not be shy around guys." She was talking about girls needing to have reservations about sex and putting out for dudes. I combated this frame by mentioning that girls should be free to do what they like, and if 2 people like each other, they should do whatever they want and feels good, no matter what other people think. We small talked a bit more, and I continued to escalated physically. I had my hands rubbing her thighs, and caressing her hands. After 5 minutes or so, I structured my pull. "It's so cold here, we can go back to my place where it's warmer... my place has a (in English) heater." She asked me what I meant by 'heater' and I translated it for her using my phone. She insisted that she had to go though because she had her dance lesson. I held strong to my frame.
We ended up walking for around 5 minutes back to the hostel. I was proactive prior to leaving my room, and I had the lighting figured out. The 2 bedside lamps provided a seductive ambience to the room. I told her that I didn't like shoes in my room, and told her to remove them. She complied. I hopped onto the bed and told her to join me.
At this point, I can't remember the specifics of what we were talking about too much. I tried to put on my "sweet talk" persona where I act very cute, and sweet, but she didn't seem very receptive to it. This persona was something I was experimenting with with overall positive results. However, this was the first experience I had encountered where the girl didn't seem to enjoy my cute persona so much.
In any case, I persisted with it, and started cuddling her. Eventually I was up close against her face and went in to kiss her. I don't remember how it happened exactly, but I figure it was around the height of emotional levels. She turned her face, so I met with her cheek. She said that in China, people only meant to kiss after knowing each other for a longer time. She seemed to enjoying my company, so I ignored her unhelpful frame. I cheek kissed her some more, breaking up the escalation with the "sweet talk" I was experimenting with. Eventually, she asked me, "You really want to kiss me right?" I don't remember my exact response, but I think I weaved my way around it, to keep the mystery. At one point I was just lying on my back, facing the ceiling and out of nowhere she came for my face and passionately made out with me, tongue and everything for about 1 second. Huh?
After that moment, I escalated into more kissing, which was met with token resistance. I managed to work past it, and we made out heavily. I was pretty passionate, and moaned a little bit. I rubbed my hands around her thighs, and rubbed her pussy through her pants. At one point, her hand grazed against my dick, and I grabbed hold onto her hand and cupped her hands on my dick. Instant hard on. I began to rub her pussy through her pants. After more kissing, I was the first to pull back. In hindsight, I don't know if this was a flaw on my behalf, such that I instead should've escalated further without breaks. In multiple instances I've escalated without breaks straight into sex successfully. Don't know if it is technically bad to have a break when things are already hot and heavy. Curious to hear about your thoughts on this.
Anyway, after the break, she seemed to be pulled out of a trance state and seemed to come back down to earth. I kissed her again, but it wasn't very well received. I then climbed on top of her, and kissed her, which she didn't seem to enjoy. She seemed to get pretty antsy. We fooled around a bit more, and she commented that she was so fat. I then proceeded to kiss her stomach and I reassured her she wasn't. She was probably a spot on average. I told her that I thought her body was very cute. She then asked me whether I liked her boobs, and she pulled up her top, flashing a large juicy pair almost bursting out of her bra. I told her I didn't get a good enough look (because I didn't have my glases) to tell her if I liked them or not and I told her to show me them again. At that point, so went full 180 on me and said she had to go to her dance lesson now. I persisted in getting her to stay, but I was met with a hard no. I accepted the fact she was leaving. She hurriedly packed her things, and left my room, curtly and coldly saying goodbye.
-----
Finishing thoughts:
What I did well:
- I had a strong frame. When it came to pulling and physical escalation, I led strongly and was not phased by her resistance.
- I think my comfort building was pretty good. Initially she was a little on edge around me, but by the time we were in bed, she seemed comfortable. Although I could've done even better with this.
- I think I managed my attainability pretty well. When she qualified her dancing ability to me, I rewarded her, telling her I thought it was really cool. I reassured her that I thought she was cute. I think attainability was especially important, because there was a clear value differential.
- Physical escalation was good mostly.
- I showed her that I was not judgemental and thought that girls should be free to express their sexual desire despite what their culture might think.
What I should've done differently:
- I should not have climbed on top of her when escalating. Especially since she was definitely inexperienced and giving me nervous resistance.
- I could've made her feel more comfortable in bed with me.
- I seemed too eager to see her boobs the second time. I think this combined with me climbing on top of her (given how inexperienced she was) was the reason why she left. Being late for her dance lesson provided even more of a reason to leave.
- I possibly should not have not created a gap between escalating straight from kissing to sex. But I'm not sure on this one.
More reports incoming!
Jeffrey
