Is it worth to physically chase in these 3 cases

[lux7]

In your experience and/or following your style:

1.
A girl is leaving a club/bar, you like her but you haven't talked to her at all (for whatever reason).
Is it worth it to chase her outside to ask for her contact?

2.
A girl is leaving a club/bar, you try to stop her, she's not unfriendly (and possibly she actually smiles) but she doesn't stop anyway (maybe a friend was ahead or she was in a group).
Is it worthy to chase her outside to ask for her contact?

3.
You see a girl entering a metro stop (or a train station or something similar), she possibly looks a bit hurried and/or listens to music.
You're going somewhere else, you should literally run after her to catch her.
Is it worth it?


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In my experience, for 1 and 2, it wasn't really too worthy of my time (and being seen like a crazy guy by the bouncers or by the bystanders ) even though in some rare instances I got at least a lead for a meet up.
But every time I don't do it, I always feel like I should have and/or I might have missed "my (kind of) girl", even though it's likely I might see a similar one later on or the next day.

I think I have 2 issues that bring me to regret every time I don't "at least give it a shot":

1. I have "girl ADD", whenever I see someone I like, I don't mind much about all the other girls: I gotta go there and ask for a contact, even though I know that most of the times it won't go anywhere without the chance for a deeper connection. Asking for a contact is for me like saying "cool, at least you've tried and done everything from your side".

2. I'm short and my target girl is not taller than I am, plus I wouldn't consider sleeping or going out with a girl I don't really like. This means that for me seeing one that "fits the bill" is not too common. However, rationally, it's likely I will see more than one in an evening out or the very next day.

What do you guys think?

 

[Light]

Hi Lucifer,

The simple answer is a "No" for all 3.

However, in regards to question 1, I would do this:
- Head outside before she does, either for a quick smoke (if you're a smoker), or pretend to be looking / waiting for a friend to come out. Once she comes out, you can open her normally, and wouldnt' come across as chasing, since you're already "just happen to be there".

I think I have 2 issues that bring me to regret every time I don't "at least give it a shot":

1. I have "girl ADD", whenever I see someone I like, I don't mind much about all the other girls: I gotta go there and ask for a contact, even though I know that most of the times it won't go anywhere without the chance for a deeper connection. Asking for a contact is for me like saying "cool, at least you've tried and done everything from your side".

2. I'm short and my target girl is not taller than I am, plus I wouldn't consider sleeping or going out with a girl I don't really like. This means that for me seeing one that "fits the bill" is not too common. However, rationally, it's likely I will see more than one in an evening out or the very next day.

What do you guys think?

Sounds like you have some Approach Anxiety when you spot a girl that "Could be the one".
But this mindset is a poison for you. Because every time you see a girl you like and fits your criteria, you may be putting her as a "Potential Girlfriend". This creates scarcity about women in your mind, and you will always be going through this cycle of problem 1 and 2.

What you need to be doing is approach all kinds of girls, tall or short, to help build up both your experience and confidence.

Trust me, I'm a short guy too (about 5 ft 3"), but I still do well with taller women.

 

[Chase]

Lucifer-

These are all low-percentage moves that you'll want to consider versus the risk factors. e.g., if you're in a nightclub you're never going to be in again, and there aren't really any other women there that you're interested in and you're probably going to leave and go somewhere else anyway, then yes, do it - occasionally this will work okay. If your reputation at that club is important (i.e., it's a place you go regularly) or there are more women you'd like to meet there and some of them or some people who know them may potentially see them, don't do it.

On the transit approach, the "risk" here is defraying your confidence and desire to run transit game. Meeting girls on transit is right up there with nightclubs as a favorite for me; you can meet women easily, naturally, effortlessly, and do it wherever you're going. However, if you're in the zone and you're doing a lot of street and transit approaches in quick succession, these can sometimes be worth doing; whereas normally you'd run a girl like this down and then proceed to fumble all over yourself if you aren't used to doing it, when you're "on" you stand a much better chance of coming across charming, charismatic, and commanding, and having her stop and take note. And if you take a rejection (pretty likely, considering the circumstance), it isn't liable to knock you off too much, and you'll just keep going and meet another girl in a minute when you re-board the train / bus / etc.

Chase

 

[lux7]

Hi Lucifer,

The simple answer is a "No" for all 3.

However, in regards to question 1, I would do this:
- Head outside before she does, either for a quick smoke (if you're a smoker), or pretend to be looking / waiting for a friend to come out. Once she comes out, you can open her normally, and wouldnt' come across as chasing, since you're already "just happen to be there".

What you need to be doing is approach all kinds of girls, tall or short, to help build up both your experience and confidence.

Trust me, I'm a short guy too (about 5 ft 3"), but I still do well with taller women.

Agree, that's a move I use often, also when she's in a group/position hard to approach and I see her going to the toilet .

Yes, that could be useful indeed.
My "awe" towards taller women is slowly receding, last evening one was asking me to go to the dancefloor and it took "only" a drunk girl's 5 pushes and a friend's push to get there .

Lucifer-

These are all low-percentage moves that you'll want to consider versus the risk factors. e.g., if you're in a nightclub you're never going to be in again, and there aren't really any other women there that you're interested in and you're probably going to leave and go somewhere else anyway, then yes, do it - occasionally this will work okay. If your reputation at that club is important (i.e., it's a place you go regularly) or there are more women you'd like to meet there and some of them or some people who know them may potentially see them, don't do it.

Yes, I totally agree.

Guys, to avoid these situations where your target might be taking off and you're left in a position to chase,
what do you think about the famed 3 seconds rule?

I feel it might come across as desperate entering a bar and jumping right away on a girl.
So I often think "OK, I'll spend a little bit of time around, check the surroundings, accustomize myself here and make people feel accustomed to my presence and then an approach would seem much more normal".

Possible exception: when I go late to a bar, like when I wrote this message, in those cases it could be good to obey the 3seconds rule because otherwise you run the risk that the prettiest girls will be leaving as people get more and more wasted..

On the transit approach, the "risk" here is defraying your confidence and desire to run transit game. Meeting girls on transit is right up there with nightclubs as a favorite for me; you can meet women easily, naturally, effortlessly, and do it wherever you're going. However, if you're in the zone and you're doing a lot of street and transit approaches in quick succession, these can sometimes be worth doing; whereas normally you'd run a girl like this down and then proceed to fumble all over yourself if you aren't used to doing it, when you're "on" you stand a much better chance of coming across charming, charismatic, and commanding, and having her stop and take note. And if you take a rejection (pretty likely, considering the circumstance), it isn't liable to knock you off too much, and you'll just keep going and meet another girl in a minute when you re-board the train / bus / etc.

Chase

You mean that the risk is that by blown off the confidence level might go down?

Yeah, I see what you mean, it's much better not being blown off, but I can manage not to make too big of a drama out of it. Personally the problem is more about the people witnessing than the girl itself.