I see. Although I wasn't actually talking about your investment level as perceived by her, I meant your investment level as perceived by you... thinking about her, planning, writing posts about her... all this is investment. Any level of investment makes it difficult to be completely in the moment and making rational, unfiltered decisions. Let me give you an example. I bought a stock... the value went down. So I thought to myself "I will wait until the value goes up again". Value went down a bit further... I thought to myself "ohh... now I will have to wait longer for the value to go up again"... value went down a bit further. The correct mental process here is "if I saw this stock for the first time, would I buy it? NOPE!... then SELL", it's clear to see that rationally this is correct, but emotionally incorrect. So I'm saying you now perceive her as higher value than she is, due to your having spent all this time planning and plotting the strategy and writing posts about her etc. DUDE, there are MILLIONS of women out there! Because she flirted with you she's almost your girlfriend in your mind. And, workplace seduction is not at all discreet! I don't mean to be an asshole, you are a great guy and I want to be gentle, but I have to drive this point home, because developing your abundance mentality is absolutely pivotal to success in seduction.
I also suggest that you read
this article, well I'm 39 soon to be 40 and I struggled with this a bit (was in the friendzone of a 23yo for a year or so, starting soon after my divorce, she claimed I was too old for her, although in hindsight it was more like moved too slow, attraction expired)... there is also a part 2
here. Umm I don't think your age is necessarily a HUGE issue provided you keep a few factors in mind. Firstly, at 50+ it helps to be SUCCESSFUL. Normally we wouldn't recommend wearing a Rolex or any of those flashy status-boosting devices, but for you and me, we should try to look the part whenever we go out. Smart casual is the ticket, like in
this article, this basically shows what I wear daily. More crucially be VERY careful of what personal information you give out about yourself, you want NOTHING that would disturb the image of you as a successful businessman, artist, or whatever is your bent. Secondly, you REALLY need your body fundamentals in check, and I understand you are concerned about your weight (so am I), this is doubly important given your age. Thirdly, you will simply have to be much more of a badass, much more of a playful, teasing vibe, saying things that most people couldn't get away with... or you can go for a VERY low effort, deadpan style, but whatever it is, you have to pull it off perfectly. This will take LOTS of practice, as a 20yo you could fumble it through, but as a successful high value older man you MUST be on point. If you want to be successful, I suggest not only diet, gym, fashion, but also consider voice classes, acting classes...? You CAN nail this, but you must be determined, get what I mean?
Okay, I realize the above might have sounded a bit discouraging, but the other thing to consider is there are plenty of girls out there who will sleep with you just as you are, you just have to find them. You absolutely must be approaching at every stage of your journey, as this will give you valuable feedback on what you need to prioritorize in terms of your body language fundamentals, conversation, and so forth. What I would suggest for you right at this moment, based on the information you've given, is homeless pickup. Tell your wife that you have to go to a company retreat, or perhaps a health spa or some bullshit, where you cannot be contacted... or a weekend with the boys or something of that nature. Then go to another city with a return ticket (I suggest 3 days initially) and $50 per day you'll be there, and a Starbucks card. Take a few changes of clothes and a travel iron, as you'll need to be looking sharp. The nature of the game is that you go out all day and night trying to pick up women, when you get too tired to continue, and if you haven't picked up you sleep in a park or on a pavement or somewhere. You screen aggressively for logistics and NEXT those who don't have their own place etc, unless they provide some sort of other value to you. Here is a
field report I wrote while playing this game, hopefully you will find it inspiring. Anyone can play -- I'm not sure I've ever been to a girl's place through homeless pickup, but I have had several lays, met a future girlfriend, and had SHITLOADS of fun trying, it has absolutely been the best thing for my game. I especially recommend it to you, because I feel you lack commitment due to your current living situation. Nothing focuses the mind more than being exposed and out on the streets with nothing to do but pick up girls.
Finally, I wonder why you don't consider a separation -- yes I understand you have kids etc, and your wife would probably be devastated, but part of being a high value man is that you MUST train yourself to put YOUR OWN NEEDS FIRST. Honestly, separated is not so bad, particularly if your kids are older. Why do you stay? Is it fear? Or is it caretaking your wife's emotions? Or is it that you genuinely love your wife, but want to have your cake and eat it too? (This is closest to the situation with me and my girlfriend of 2mths, with whom I've been kinda involved on/off for a year or so, I started dating again, even though I'm still in r/ship and I don't feel good about this, I will have to sort things out properly soon). Anyway, I feel that not much progress can be made in seduction until you separate, otherwise you simply will not have the edge you need (and I won't either).
Ray
