Location location location??

[douchecookie]

Alrighty So I have a question for you guys that I already think I have the answer to but I was just wanting some input!

I just recently graduated college from school in saint louis and I moved to wichita kansas. Now mind you wichita is a fairly descent size town (for what you expect in the middle of nowhere lolol ) but I was having an extremely hard time closing the deal in this area. Back in saint louis it was pretty easy to close as i had somewhere around a 50% success rate and I always at least made out with the chick. Now I move down to wichita and every girl is a "saint" lol! Obviously I think my status change from an unemployed college student to a working individual did change my success rate... quite a bit... For a month it was 0/9. Obviously I tried to make myself less of boyfriend material as I just hinted at my job, said I was only staying in wichita for a short period of time, and I even bought another car (an old civic) to help with that image lol. But still my success rate is nowhere near what it was at in saint louis. Now do you guys think that just culturally wichita and saint louis are just different because wichita is a conservative area? (at least that is what I believe)

Thanks a bunch guys for your input!!

 

[A Life Loquacious]

No, I think location has a lot to do with it. I live in a pretty small town and the kind of women I am most attracted to (and also tend to attract with minimum effort) aren't so plentiful. If I wanted to get with local women I'd have to change my look and personality to fit their more conservative requirements. On the other hand when I make trips up to bigger cities I find it much easier to get to talk to women that are what I'm after but because I'm usually staying on friends' couches and so on, the logistics side is letting me down a little when it comes to actually getting them to a seduction location. A couple of times now I've missed out on sex because I've not had anywhere to take them and it's not been an option to go to theirs either for whatever reason. I'm starting to think I might have to start renting a hotel room for a couple of nights rather than couch-surf but that probably doubles the cost of a weekend away which is already hard to afford on my (currently) mediocre income. Also when you're out socialising in a big city like London there's no guarantee the party or club you end up going to will be within ten miles of your hotel. I'm still not very confident with the idea of sex in semi-public locations either, which so far has ruled out the idea of bathroom cubicles in clubs/back alleys etc which is again, something of a shame as I'm sure I've missed out on a couple of prime opportunities there in the past too!

 

[Chase]

Hey DC,

It's hard to say without knowing more about your situation - e.g., were you meeting girls at college parties now and you're meeting them at bars so it's a different type of environment, or were there other changes, etc. But, having spent a few nights out in St. Louis and a few nights out in Kansas City (I never made it to Wichita), I can tell you I definitely felt a more conservative vibe in KC than STL. That's not to say that's accurate; anyone who tells you he's got a pulse on a place after only a few nights out is deluding himself. But my quick and dirty impression was that as you neared Kansas, the conservativism went up.

You can probably still find ways to close, but you'll have to tweak your game. One recommendation is finding a guy living in town there who's got it figured out and is pulling and laying girls regularly and figuring out what he's doing that you're not - and then start doing that.

Chase

 

[douchecookie]

Hey Chase! Thanks for the response!

I actually was still in the bar scene in saint louis but i was mainly meeting college chicks (Ive had fake id since ive been 18 lolol). But the chicks I have been meeting wichita are not college chicks and are currently working (they have never gone to college). A large portion of them have kids too... which is kinda weird but apparently its common in wichita. But yeah I think I am just not "connecting" to them properly as I have refined my skills toward specific types of chicks (prepy college educated brunettes) in saint louis and I am just gonna have to adjust my game. One thing I have thought about is "adjusting" my wardrobe as I honestly dress kinda metro and I have noticed a lot of chicks in wichita arent too into that... oops
I have tried to find individuals who specialize in pulling in that area... but so far no such luck!

 

[Chase]

DC,

I actually was still in the bar scene in saint louis but i was mainly meeting college chicks (Ive had fake id since ive been 18 lolol). But the chicks I have been meeting wichita are not college chicks and are currently working (they have never gone to college). A large portion of them have kids too... which is kinda weird but apparently its common in wichita. But yeah I think I am just not "connecting" to them properly as I have refined my skills toward specific types of chicks (prepy college educated brunettes) in saint louis and I am just gonna have to adjust my game. One thing I have thought about is "adjusting" my wardrobe as I honestly dress kinda metro and I have noticed a lot of chicks in wichita arent too into that... oops

I struggled with girls like this for a long time. Girls tend to auto-reject pretty easily when you're an attractive, well-dressed, college-educated guy, and they're uneducated, poorly-dressed women with kids. They just assume you'll consider yourself superior to them, and shut you down before you can wound their pride. And to be honest, I DID have an ego thing with these girls for a long time... my feeling was always, "Whoa, this girl couldn't even go to COLLEGE? And she's got KIDS? All right, I might as well try and take one for the team to get down the skill of connecting with and picking up low class girls..." but I was always somewhat reserved and aloof, and women can tell this and it makes them shut down and go cold on you faster.

You may not have any prejudices yourself; if you do, you'll need to sort them out before you're able to close with any consistency here. Being judgmental, while internal, shows on the outside and plays havoc with your interactions.

Aside from that, focus on being warm, charming, and self-deprecating - you'll need to tone down your game and be more humble with a woman from a lower socioeconomic class than you will with one from a higher one, with whom you'll be accustomed to doing more teasing and challenging.

Chase