Looking for a new motivation

[BarryS1]

I’ve accomplished my goals of changing my personality from a pushover to a passive asshole and defeating my bitterness towards a particular girl.

I started approaching in August after a girl friendzoned me in early 2013. She was the first girl I tried hitting on (besides clubs) because I had no experience. After 4 weeks of spending time with her, I disappeared and never answered her messages despite running into her several times. I am glad I never revealed my feelings because she was a bitter, cluster-B narcissist with no experience with men.

The first four months of pickup, I used her for motivation everyday. She even texted me in October to catch-up after 6 months of radio silence. When we met, I was so disgusted I didn't want to flirt with her. She ran into me the next day and said we could hang out anytime. Never contacted her since then. Here’s the link: https://boards.girlschase.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=3584.

After recovering from my first dry spell and getting my second lay, the bitterness disappeared. I knew what I did wrong and discovered women who gave me the same emotions. Looking at her twitter and Facebook pictures did nothing for me.

However, I kept at it! Pouring over her pictures almost everyday for motivation - it did nothing except for 4-5 episodes when something would turn up on her social media. By May when the results REALLY started pouring in, I lost the urge to look at her pictures altogether.

Here's what I realized:
It's hard to be mad at someone when the fault is yours.

I've lost motivation to do pickup because I was living for two goals.

Has anyone else gone through episodes of this success and motivation struggle?

 

[Gentle_Phrases]

I’ve accomplished my goals of changing my personality from a pushover to a passive asshole and defeating my bitterness towards a particular girl.

Has anyone else gone through episodes of this success and motivation struggle?

Kudos on achieving what you wanted to, man. I have absolutely been there.

I've lost motivation to do pickup because I was living for two goals

You must remember that the actual act of achieving a goal at best gives you momentary high and at worst relieves you of happiness, temporarily. Eventually, you'll stabilize and return to your base level of happiness (based on genetics plus your life station and your thinking habits). At that point you can review your experiences and choose a new objective that is more appropriate for you. Maybe you'll want to have sex with a million more women. Maybe you'll want to turn to a monastery. You do you.

I can't get laid but when I got my first date from cold approach I was elated! Then I hated the world because life is meaningless and wow that took a long time. Then I played playstation and got over myself. Now I'm chasing skirts again.

We're just animals, bro.

I've lost motivation to do pickup because I was living for two goals.

Time for some new ones

 

[BarryS1]

I can't get laid but when I got my first date from cold approach I was elated! Then I hated the world because life is meaningless and wow that took a long time. Then I played playstation and got over myself. Now I'm chasing skirts again.

Thanks Gentle_Phrases, I just got out of the phase - took a whole 3 weeks though. I had two really had FU reports the last couple weeks, so I am motivated again. My new goals include understand a type of girl and overcoming LMR. I guess what motivates me is getting tangled in a problem that gets me frustrated.

I definitely experienced moments of meaningless like you suggested.

 

[trashKENNUT]

BarryS1,

Here's what I realized:
It's hard to be mad at someone when the fault is yours.

I hate that stuff, but yea...

Zac

 

[BarryS1]

I felt motivated for a couple days, not I'm back to a slump. I don't want to be a psychic vampire, but I can't muster up the strength for cold-approach anymore. I spent 3hrs. spread over 3 days for cold-approach and I couldn't even do one! All I was thinking was "what's the point?" or "this is not exciting." This has been the biggest challenge in pick-up for me so far.

BarryS1,

Here's what I realized:
It's hard to be mad at someone when the fault is yours.

I hate that stuff, but yea...

Zac

Zac, now that I realized it, those two motivations drove everything for me the last year. It's been almost a year since I started approaching. I gained a lot of new skills, but I am just as lost now as when I started. I went through a momentary "arc" in my life, now I'm searching for something else.

Kinda like taking a shower to get the dirt off, drying off, and figuring out how spend the day.