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FR  losing a girl 'cause you needed to buy condoms

lux7

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Apr 10, 2013
Messages
880
The way I met is one of those things which made me reflect today: we exchanged a few emails as I was interested in a real estate property and then proposed a lunch.

We couldn't make lunch and it was EXTREMELY easy to transition to a drink-date thing.

The same is happening with another girl I had met for a viewing.

What made me reflect is that when you come from a position of safety (a customer with a job) and good value (a guy who interested in buying a flat), getting dates is so incredibly easier than street game.

Anyway, I'll keep it short: I meet this real estate woman for drink and sushi, we talk about everything and we speak a lot about life and dating dynamics (mostly me explaining her).

As we then move towards my place a thoughts keeps bugging me: I finished all condoms. We stop at a supermarket and we both know I'm looking for condoms even though I keep calling it "need to get chewing gum". As we resume walking towards home it's all a lot of jokes about innuendos of the customer-agent relationship and the wine we are going to drink.
She even suggests a late night shop might have condoms.

But here's the thing: joke and reality don't mix well.
Once I indeed stop at a late market shop on the way and ask her to wait outside as I buy the "chewing gum", all changes.

Now as she waits outside alone, probably thinking what a slut she is (she's married), she's not so willing to come to my place for the "real estate assessment" we were joking about.
Now there's no plausible deniability.

Now the resistances are not on a humorous level anymore, she calls it on the carpet that I was buying "rubbers".

And a few meters after the shop, she doesn't go forward anymore.
She still likes me a lot till the point she says tomorrow she would cook for me (she's often alone with the husband being a pilot), but I'm having none of that shit and tells her it's now or never.
She turns back.

Lost her because I bought condoms on the way.


LESSONS LEARNED:
Have your condoms home :).
 

Smurf

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Apr 7, 2013
Messages
714
Yo lux!

Bad luck on the comdon thing, I try and always have a backup somewhere with me or somewhere at my house.

What made me reflect is that when you come from a position of safety (a customer with a job) and good value (a guy who interested in buying a flat), getting dates is so incredibly easier than street game.

Can you flesh this out more? I'm not entirely sure what you mean but I'm really interested!

She still likes me a lot till the point she says tomorrow she would cook for me (she's often alone with the husband being a pilot), but I'm having none of that shit and tells her it's now or never.
She turns back.

Why not take her up on it? I could understand going for a hard push, but if she counter offers, why not take her up on it? Seems like she was still somewhat interested if she was willing to cook for you (most likely at her house?)

Seems like you played it well to the end, sometimes luck isn't on our side ;)

Jake.
 

Byron

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jun 10, 2013
Messages
186
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

lux7

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Apr 10, 2013
Messages
880
Can you flesh this out more? I'm not entirely sure what you mean but I'm really interested!

Well yeah, on a more general note I'm a bit changing my views on (pure) cold VS "warm" approach in the sense that the latter seems to be much more reliable and much lower effort (provided you have the chance of course, I shouldn't even add that this is on no way suggesting on giving up completely to cold approach).

Example, if you meet a pretty girl in the street and she likes you, great. But if the next evening her, say, colleagues, are organizing a night out and the cute boy she likes in the other team will also be there... What are the odds for the cool street stranger VS the colleague?
I think if the two guys are around the same level the cute colleague will be in a stronger position to see her 7-8 times out of 10.

Any other "warm" positions which don't entail social circle seem to me also hold a stronger position. Say, if you two were attending the same event. Or the same course. Or if you entered into contact "naturally" or because of common obligations.

In this specific cases: one girl saw me before as I visited her office, so I was a potential client of her firm.
The other one was supposed to show me a flat, so I was a potential direct customer of hers where she had chased me a couple of times as part of her normal work routine.
In these two specific cases I also had the added bonus of a "safer", "rather well off" background: even though I'm as far from rich as it gets, I was still looking to buy a house, which puts me in a good category in many women's eyes.

I could bring more examples of times it was very easy getting dates out of "warmer" interactions, but you probably got the point.
 

Byron

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jun 10, 2013
Messages
186
hahaha i just bought more. I've got three field reports to put up.

hopefully talk soon fam
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