This isnt a "true" LR because this isnt the first time I have slept with this girl. I met her off Tinder about 18 months ago and we hooked up, but then she ghosted.
So when I saw her add me to Facebook on Monday I knew immediately either I was a dad or she was horny and wanted to hook up again.
Luckily it was the latter.
I knew in situations like this where you know the girl likes you that all you have to do is do a decently good job of leading the interaction forward, and not do anything stupid along the way, so I kept it cool. On Facebook it was just "Oh hey stranger! how have you been?" talk about what we've been up to, etc. Drop some cool/funny antidotes in there and ask her out. I was sure never to mention the fact that I had been ghosted for 18 months and showing absolutely no judgement toward her. Just act like it was the next week or whatever.
I got her number and messaged her Friday that I wanted to go out tonight or tomorrow was she free? I again told her I was curious about 3 bars which did she prefer and she volunteered lets bar hop! Perfect, lots of built in venue changes!
So we meet up on time, and since I knew this was a wait out the clock until we hook up situation I didnt really do anything except vibe and let her chase. Since we already planned on barhopping it served as a great segue whenever the conversation lulled. Just suggest going somewhere else. A few times she suggested places to go. I didnt feel like this wasnt me leading. It felt more like when a girl takes your hand and leads you through the club. You know youre in. So I let her game me. We were taking turns paying for rounds and and was qualifying pretty hard.
After a few bounces Im like uhhh lets just go to your place and chill to which she agrees. We get there and get situated on the couch. I expect netflix or whatever to come on but she says shes a psych major and has these games she plays to get to know her kids. She gets it out and its basically the fucking question game. Now this girl is running the question game on me, great. So we play that for a while getting closer and closer cuddling and then make out and go in her room and hook up.
The only thing im worried about from this lay is im not super attracted to her physically, and Im not sure I put enough of a FB frame out there, especially cuz some of the questions got deep. I asked her why she ghosted me the last time at some point, to see what happened, and she said something along the lines of she was super busy in her life and was liking me a lot and couldnt have a relationship. If I see her again Im going to have to focus on managing her expectations so she knows I will come fuck her now and again but I wont be her boyfriend.
The other thing that stuck out to me is how this was basically her gaming me. She decided she wanted some, reached out to me and other than stepping back and letting me play the man role of asking her out and suggesting we go to her place, she basically ran the pickup by the book.
The only thing I thought was a little odd was I did tell her on FB to text me we should hang out and gave me her number, and re replied on facebook with basically the same message: her number and said text me we should hang out. I didnt think her not jumping through the hoop was a shit test, I think it was her saying do your role in the dance, man. What do you guys think?
So when I saw her add me to Facebook on Monday I knew immediately either I was a dad or she was horny and wanted to hook up again.
Luckily it was the latter.
I knew in situations like this where you know the girl likes you that all you have to do is do a decently good job of leading the interaction forward, and not do anything stupid along the way, so I kept it cool. On Facebook it was just "Oh hey stranger! how have you been?" talk about what we've been up to, etc. Drop some cool/funny antidotes in there and ask her out. I was sure never to mention the fact that I had been ghosted for 18 months and showing absolutely no judgement toward her. Just act like it was the next week or whatever.
I got her number and messaged her Friday that I wanted to go out tonight or tomorrow was she free? I again told her I was curious about 3 bars which did she prefer and she volunteered lets bar hop! Perfect, lots of built in venue changes!
So we meet up on time, and since I knew this was a wait out the clock until we hook up situation I didnt really do anything except vibe and let her chase. Since we already planned on barhopping it served as a great segue whenever the conversation lulled. Just suggest going somewhere else. A few times she suggested places to go. I didnt feel like this wasnt me leading. It felt more like when a girl takes your hand and leads you through the club. You know youre in. So I let her game me. We were taking turns paying for rounds and and was qualifying pretty hard.
After a few bounces Im like uhhh lets just go to your place and chill to which she agrees. We get there and get situated on the couch. I expect netflix or whatever to come on but she says shes a psych major and has these games she plays to get to know her kids. She gets it out and its basically the fucking question game. Now this girl is running the question game on me, great. So we play that for a while getting closer and closer cuddling and then make out and go in her room and hook up.
The only thing im worried about from this lay is im not super attracted to her physically, and Im not sure I put enough of a FB frame out there, especially cuz some of the questions got deep. I asked her why she ghosted me the last time at some point, to see what happened, and she said something along the lines of she was super busy in her life and was liking me a lot and couldnt have a relationship. If I see her again Im going to have to focus on managing her expectations so she knows I will come fuck her now and again but I wont be her boyfriend.
The other thing that stuck out to me is how this was basically her gaming me. She decided she wanted some, reached out to me and other than stepping back and letting me play the man role of asking her out and suggesting we go to her place, she basically ran the pickup by the book.
The only thing I thought was a little odd was I did tell her on FB to text me we should hang out and gave me her number, and re replied on facebook with basically the same message: her number and said text me we should hang out. I didnt think her not jumping through the hoop was a shit test, I think it was her saying do your role in the dance, man. What do you guys think?
