Making it nonchalant

[Native]

Hey. i've noticed something thats holding me back with women. I feel like when I ask a girl if shes single, if she says no im presenting it correctly.

like, i dont care if she has a boyfriend, its not the end of my world. how do i properly let girls know that im asking if shes single and regardless of her answer im chill about it. like, i dont like a girl because im asking, im asking because she was attractive and that's it. How do I properly communicate that to a girl.

Franco, Chase, Richard, Anatman? Any help here...

 

[Troy]

Native,

Have you seen the article " Are You Single?". If not check it out and if you have then reread it. The way you structure your sentence says a lot. One example I can think of as the wrong way to ask if she is single is using the word " boyfriend "

- " Do you have a boyfriend? "
- " Where is your boyfriend? "
- " Are you shopping for your boyfriend? "

If I understand your question correctly, you are saying that you find the girl attractive but you don't like her. Correct? Could you provide some examples of how you ask a girl if she is single? Ultimately, body language will help you convey what your intention is. Focus on facial expressions and voice tone to get the message across the way you want.

Troy

 

[fsc]

i dont care if she has a boyfriend

Then why do you even ask if she's single? Why not just have a conversation, then let her decide whether or not to disclose her relationship status when you try to make a more significant move, such as a number close?

how do i properly let girls know that im asking if shes single and regardless of her answer im chill about it

You: Are you single?
Her: No, sorry...I have a boyfriend.
You: Cool (bored face and pause). What brings you here?

Communicate by being. Be chill about it, it'll show in your responses and body language, and the girl will know.

Why not just tell her that you find her attractive?

 

[Franco]

Native,

I'm actually not really a fan of the "are you single?" opener, so I can't really give you much advice there. You have to have extremely strong fundamentals because you're forcing the girl to make a quick decision on whether or not you're "creepy," and it puts a lot of pressure on her to answer that question RIGHT after the very first thing you say. I prefer to open direct with a compliment or to use a situational opener.

I would experiment and see what works best for you.

- Franco

 

[Mr.Rob]

In my experience the basic deal of the "are you single?" opener is basically to start the conversation whilst breaking her out of autopilot, while also simultaneously displaying genuine interest without spilling all the beans at one time. If that makes sense.

It's the same as saying "hi" except it breaks her out of autopilot and she knows you most likely find her attractive while still not knowing completely if you do.

Whatever her answer is doesn't matter... at all. If she sticks around to talk to you then proceed as usual.

When I use it's like "Hey! are you single?... (whatever her answer is).. Oh cool so anyway blah blah blah"

Like view it for what it is. A way to start a conversation. It took me a while before I was able to do that correctly and have it go well.

Ideally the way I use it she gives her answer and I cut and switch the conversation thread so quick that by the time I'm finished talking to her she doesn't even remember how I opened her in the first place.

Give opener -> Change thread -> Get laid... if only it were that easy.

Good luck

-Rob

 

[someone]

Why bother asking if she's single? Who cares? Fuck her boyfriend if she isn't... If she gives you her phone number, then that's all that matters. YOU have no loyalty to her boyfriend.

Someone else (I think Franco) posted that the best way to ask younger women (younger than say 23-24) out is to say "hey, we should hang out some time, you seem [insert compliment here]." I couldn't agree more. Older women aren't typically looking to hang out, and younger women aren't usually looking for something serious.