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Making out fast. Conflicting experiences.

Prehistoric

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 17, 2013
Messages
172
I just came back from a club (it's 1:30 am in Europe now :D) where I opened this very stunningly beautiful girl very successfully (there was an old woman with big fake boobs and I told the girl I opened that the old woman was my ex wife and that we divorced because during sex she was suffocating me with those huge boobs), she was all over me and she was touching me after 1 minute, I went for the kiss and she pushed my back very angrily (then I moved to another spot and ignored her completely and she actually started looking at me the whole time).

Now this entirely conflicts with an experience I had months ago (when I still wasn't reading a lot of stuff on picking up, dating etc..) where I approached a girl, the reaction was the same as the girl above, I went for the kiss after basically the same amount of time and things went pretty well.

Now, until the kiss, the reaction of the two girls was basically identical.

Why do you think the reaction to the kiss attempt was entirely opposite? Is there some hidden signals I missed?
And by the way, what do you think about making out so fast? Is it really the best thing to do, or should I just build attraction for 20/30/40 minutes and the ask her to move with me somewhere else, build rapport and then making a move? I am kinda scared of letting time go by without moves. Am I exaggerating and should take my time? Have I taken the article "Attraction has an expiration date" too literally?

Obviously I am talking about situations when u're planning to bed her on the same day you meet her without grabbing number and going on a date.

I am also experimenting asking numbers and bring them on a date, but I see that as an entirely different kind of game. I'd like to get good at both.
 
you miss 100% of the shots you don't take

topcat

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Dec 20, 2012
Messages
964
And by the way, what do you think about making out so fast? Is it really the best thing to do, or should I just build attraction for 20/30/40 minutes and the ask her to move with me somewhere else, build rapport and then making a move? I am kinda scared of letting time go by without moves. Am I exaggerating and should take my time? Have I taken the article "Attraction has an expiration date" too literally?

Hey Prehistoric,

I believe the consensus on here is that it's best to save kissing for escalation to sex.

I like to think of it like this. You meet a girl, there's sexual attraction. Let's liken this attraction (or "energy") to steam. The attraction builds like pressure, and when you escalate that sexual "pressure" is being relieved i.e channeled through a sexual act. What happens when you escalate early is you let off this sexual pressure without being able to convert it to sex. It get's let off, it's gone, and in order to get it back you have to build it back up again - if even possible. The sexual energy get's lost and the girl has got her fill of sexual "validation" without it leading to sex. Not good. What you want to do is channel as much of the sexual energy that get's built up into the sex act, ie. convert it through escalation to full on sex, so all the pent up energy is channeled into that act.

Save the kissing for when it really counts ;)

Hope that helps hombre,

Topcat
 

Prehistoric

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 17, 2013
Messages
172
Yes, very helpful thanks.

It might also be that I still have strong social conditioning. We're raised to think that sex is the ultimate step of a long chain that starts with holding hands, then hugging her, kissing her, etc..

the idea of interacting for some time with a girl I like with only mild incidental touching, building attraction and comfort through personality and conversation and then escalate things from kiss to sex in one blow is one I am not used to but I'll try to experiment with the next dates / girls I meet.
 
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