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- Dec 30, 2019
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Saturday
I planned for the outing to be from 1-5pm then I would have dinner and run some errands from 5-6pm at the mall where I was gaming
I left the house at 1245 and got to the location roughly at about 110pm
The location for this outing
A set of 2 malls that are actually quite far away from each other but are linked by a very long underground walkway along which there are shops and even the underground walkway can be busy with shoppers
Social momentum interaction (Will abbreviate to SMI) 1
I walk from the building where I parked my vehicle to one of the malls and pass by the smoking corner. I see this girl in a colourful dress smoking and I open her. I do some fun opener I can't remember.
Here I was not approaching with intent just to start building my momentum. Less than 15s afyter I open, her friend comes and stands really close to her. I just exit the conversation
SMI 2
I walk to the taxi stand of the mall and see a guy wearing a bike helmet and waiting around. I stand next to him and just casually ask him a question and then we start bantering. We banter for 3-4 mins. I count this as warm-up interaction 1.
Time check: 1:15pm
SMI 3
At the same taxi stand, I see a mother and her 4-5 year old daughter and I think the mother's fashion is really elegant so I thought I would open with that because I'm not approaching with intent
I get blown off
SMI 4
I enter the mall and go to the basement where there is a fountain. In general, over the past week I've found that old people are always the most willing to talk to strangers and banter around so I sit next to old guy at the fountain and we banter for 3-4 minutes. I count this as warm-up interaction 2
SMI 5
I walk to the popcorn shop nearby and pretend to look at the many different types of popcorn on display. I banter with the female shopkeeper for 3-4 minutes and find out about an interesting popcorn brand. I count this as warm up interaction 3
SMI 6
I go to an area where there are benches and some people sitting there waiting around for something. I open this middle-aged looking Japanese woman and she seems kind of uncomfortable to talk to me but I just joke with her in a friendly way and connect with her briefly. After 1-2 mins, she just awkwardly looks down at her phone. She mentioned her family
Here I was not approaching with intent. I count this as my 4th warm-up interaction.
Over the past week, at this stage I would try to find a 5th person to talk to to warm up OR if I along the way saw girls I liked, I could start approaching with intent
Time check at this time: 145pm
Sudden Approach anxiety
I see this girl in a flamboyant red dress with white flowery patterns in high heels walking very confidently and I think to myself ok I want to approach her. For some reason, my mind starts getting scared because of how dense and close together everything is in the basement shopping district of this mall.
There's definitely more pressure to approach here than other places. tons of people in restaurants and shopkeepers and sales people line the walkways and I feel a lot of pressure so I give up on approaching this girl and chill out for a few minutes because the anxiety is suddenly getting to me
I seriously take a moment to chill out and decide to go do more casual talking to build more positivity (Good troubleshooting here)
The thing to note at this stage was that I was actually feeling quite socially warmed up but that mixed in with the social momentum was a burst of AA
SMI 7
I go back to the sitting area around the fountain and sit next to an average looking girl. I use an indirect opener and she looked slightly amused because she probably thought I was hitting on her. She blew me off my just looking at her phone and not responding to me when I asked her 2 or 3 questions.
Here I'm not approaching with intent. I keep my cool and as I try to start the conversation maintain the social fundamentals that I'm training as best I can. I get blown off but walk out of interaction quite happy with myself
SMI 8
I go to the ground floor to the taxi stand and try to talk to this guy at the taxi stand and ask him 2 or 3 questions with genuine interest and this guy ignores me so here I get blown of again... By a guy... HAHA
I don't let the blow-offs affect me. Honestly, Somehow from these blow-offs I realise how secure and independent I am because in spite of these I'm still keeping my cool
Time check: 2:05pm
Approach 1
So I went into a different place which was the link to a different Mall from the train station. I see a cute girl waiting for the drinks that she was buying and I approach her with intent.
I keep the body language under control but the pace of my asking questions was bad. The good thing was that I was conscious about my fking up of the questions that I was asking her/the pace with which I did it.
I got into some kind of a 4-5 min conversation with her while she waits for her drink and then she goes and gets her drink. She gives me her instagram and I can tell from her facial expressions it's not at all going to go anywhere but I keep my cool decently.
She was actually about to walk off, but then I as casually as possible asked her out. And she said yes, but it felt kind of shaky. I then asked her if she was single and she said no. Then she said it's fine to just make friends lol. Good practice here though I fked it up.
Approach 2
I go back up to the taxi stand and as I'm exiting the mall to the taxi stand I see a girl I want to talk to so as she's walking to me I wave to her and say hi from the front. I suppose I performed it rather weakly/needily. I could have performed it with more power and force.
I get blown off without her even stopping.
Time check 2:30
Approach 3
I went into the mall and I saw a girl standing outside the art gallery around some high class shops and I approach her by side-stopping her. This approach was ridiculously needy from me. The anxiety was hitting me directly during the approach.
I lost control of my speech because I did not know what to say. I was trying to conceal the anxiety and neediness but during this interaction even if I tried to even the concealment was not successful
I decide to do some damage control here because of the blow offs and I decide to just chill out and rebuild momentum. (Credits to me for that things improved for the better)
SMI 9
I walk into the meat jerky shop and banter with the 2 sales girls for 5-6 minutes and one of them is quite cute. I make them laugh pretty hard and I have quite a good time with them. This helped me recover quite significantly from an initially rather negative/unmotivated mood I was in from the blow-offs
Approach 4
I do into the supermarket and I approach a Korean American girl and she said that she had a boyfriend and didn't look like she was about to budge on that so I exit the conversation
Approach 5
In the same supermarket, I use the arm-tap to open a girl in the wine section and open by saying that I her hair style and I very rarely see someone with such a hair style. She seems genuinely grateful to me for the compliment but then blows me off by just seriously telling me she's occupied on a texting conversation with someone on her phone
Time check: 3pm
Approach 6 and 20 min insta-date
I went into the food court at the top floor of the shopping mall I see this cute girl in very plain clothes sitting down alone on one of the tables and I approach her standing and sort of towering over her. I ground my opener casually and then compliment her style and she seems very happy that I opened her.
She says it's very awkward that I'm talking to her while standing and I just play it off and keep my cool even though almost everyone in the surrounding tables is watching. I do eventually agree that we should get more comfortable so we move to sit at a different table that is empty and we have an insta-date.
Throughout the insta-date, I deflect her questions about my identity and watch my body language but my verbal game is not great. For some reason, she gets testy. Good thing is that she leaned in towards me way more times than I leaned in towards her (maximum 2 times and of very small degree)
The failure here was to get intermediate investment and buidling an easier compliance ladder I believe. Wasan't worrying about this today though so no problem
I ask her out to a date next week, and persist in my asking about 3 times over the course of the 20 min insta-date. At the end of the date, I gave up and just left. Good experience.
Time check 3:30 p.m.
SMI 10
I see this old guy dressed in jeans and a button down shirt leaning his legs over the public bench outside the food hall like a rebel and I talk to him and have a conversation for about 10-15 minutes. Quite interesting.
A lot people are watching me talk to this old guy who teaches at one of the universities and the girl I approach next also sees me talking to him.
Approach 7
I exit the conversation with the old guy after getting quite a lot of attention from the surrounding girls and guys (stares and looks and smiles and respect)
I think to myself fk it just go appraoch this girl in her pink shirt and slim grey pants. I open with my favorite confident attire opener. The funny part is that I literally fumble on the opener, I fail to say the sentence properly... But then I recover from it and then following that my body language and conversation goes very smoothly for the next 1 minute
She says she's from Australia and is a designer but then she exits the conversation because she's not comfortable talking to strangers and I let her go. I believe that the thing that was needed here was a hard push which I am not worrying about during this outing so no worries.
I was able to be so smooth with the conversation because I made a very good effort to listen to every single word she said and the way in which she said every single word.
Time check: 355pm
Approach 8
I went to the basement again and did another approach and got blown off. Delivered compliment twice and as a result looked stupid
SMI 11 & 12
I try to have conversations with 2 different guys and both of them happen very awkwardly. This puts me in a rather unmotivated state of mind.
For the first guy, he was of rather senior age and halfway through the conversation with me his wife and kid arrived so it abruptly stopped.
The second guy was young and the conversation was plain awkward.
Time check 415pm
I change venues by walking the long underground walkway into the rather faraway but larger 2nd mall.
At this stage, I was losing motivation to approach and getting in my head a lot. I told myself to just take action and do some approaches. Not that I was feeling very negative but quite unexcited
Approach 9
I went to the bus stop outside the mall and I did an actual approach using Alek's opener: walk past the girl then walk back. This 2nd mall also happens to be adjacent to a 3rd mall where I recently started taking street-dance classes and I find out that she takes classes at the same studio as me so I drop the intent and have a friend's conversation with her
and we agree to look forward to catching each other at the dance studio maybe even tomorrow or during a separate week.
Approach 10
I walking along the walkways of this 2nd mall and I see this girl who I did not approach about 2 minutes a go. I wave to her from the front and say "hi!" as she was walking to me and I emit the friendly-dog vibe rather successfully but she just shakes her head ignores me and blows me off without stopping.
I don't get too affected by it and just laugh it off. I did have a good opener (confident walk) but I didn't manage to use it because I couldn't even stop her.
Approach 11
I follow this girl towards the taxi stand of the large 2nd mall I'm in. I really like this girl. I found her fasion to be both striking and confident. Here I didn't actually deliver my opener perfectly either. But the good thing here was that I liked her style so much that the sincereness of the imperfect delivery made a difference.
The conversation started QUITE awkwardly but I saved it from worse by listening hard to every word she said and the way she said it. And asked her more interesting questions.
I managed to keep the social power fundamentals under sufficient control. She was apparently waiting for her friend at the taxi stand and 2-3 minutes into our conversation her friend arrived and the conversation was quite awkward so she exited to see her friend. I didn't want to worry about it too much so I made no attempt to hard push and let her walk towards her friend
It was roughly around 440/445pm so this was roughly the end of the outing. In general what I would do at this stage is run my errands, and use the remaining social momentum from previous approaches in case I saw anyone I liked along the way while running my errands
Ran my errands and had dinner
Time here was about 545pm
Approach 12
Walked back to the 1st mall to run one last errand. Saw a girl in a plain but elegant one-piece orange dress while I was inside the supermarket. Did not approach her initially. Though I felt quite quite a lot of sexual desire towards her.
Just as I paid for my groceries and was exiting the supermarket, I noticed her leaving the supermarket too ahead of me
I simply run up to her and successfully arm tap side stop her and she stopped and I opened with a "I really like your look". She looked at me and I could tell she was quite attracted to me.
Unfortunately, the place where I approached her, had a lot of sales girls standing around doing nothing and even I noticed from my side vision that one of them was fking openly staring at us.
My girl was directly facing that sales girl and my guess was that there was social pressure on her not to interact with me. Girl exits with a "Sorry I need to go and see my friend" and starts walking away.
Skills that I am deliberately training in this outing
Advice on social momentum from HTMGC:
The simple concept of building social momentum and then maintaining social momentum.
Today, when I am building/maintaining social momentum, I am not going to specifically talk to women unless circumstances are easy to do so.
Before I do my first approach, I will talk to 5 different people.
If I for some reason get particularly negative, I will stop approaching, and go and talk to 2 new people. That's it. Not that hard to fk it up.
After rebuilding social momentum and positivity, I will start approaching again.
Chase does not specifically state but it seems quite evident that in building social momentum he recommends that u build social momentum with new women. I will get to this stage soon enough. For today, it's just going to be talk to sufficient numbers of whoever (guys or girls).
Advice on the fundamental of using the law of least effort in conversation from HTMGC:
In general, putting in as little effort as possible.
Ignoring insults and never getting defensive
Expressing ideas concisely and to the point not only with words
Deflecting requests for compliance, using ambiguity and statements like "maybe later"
Learning to make the other person try to get your attention
In general, appearing independent and secure.
At the core, not needing the other person's approval, acceptance, or interest.
Lessons learnt
1. Throughout this outing, there were a lot of beautiful girls that I did not approach. The excuse that I made was that the edge to their beauty is not an edge that I am personally very attracted to even though other guys may have found it attractive. I believe I cannot afford to be giving up approaches like this. Something will have to be done about this and I will follow up with a solution.
2. I have this harmful mindset, where I'm not willing to follow girls too far to approach them. A lot of times, girls are already completely aware that I am going to approach them before I approach them. They can tell purely from reflections in the glass on shops, shadows on the ground, some person walking particularly quickly (me). What this leads to is some girls putting themselves in particularly difficult scenarios in which to be approached.
E.g. Walking into a shop, choosing to get on the escalator, etc. The solution to this is to interpret this as a sign that she does not want to look easy and wants to test my social calibration and creativeness. I won't implement this immediately but the eventual goal is to whenever this happens make sure that I pursue the approach and make it happen no matter what. As long as the approach circumstances do not happen too awkwardly, I will make the approach.
3. Clear skills that I am lacking as apparent throughout the approaches documented in this field report are: Getting investment and compliance, Making the hard push when necessary,
Another skill that is not well-documented over here but I have noticed throughout my outings this week is connection-building and deep-diving.
4. There are actually a lot of approaches where I don't put a lot of effort into the opening and just get blown off, like at least twice when trying to say hi from the front. I should avoid doing these. These are not difficult to avoid.
5. Quite happy with how I managed my positive attitude and emotional state throughout this outing. There were actually quite a couple of instances (more than I normally experience) where things were going downhill. I had the discipline to chill out, rebuild social momentum, and each time some miracle happened where I my positivity and mental state recovered. Not too bad.
This concludes the end of my first week of skill-building of skills from "How To Make Girls Chase". In the week following this, I will start working on a different skill from How To Make Girls Chase. Hopefully while maintaining my progress in the skills I was deliberately training this week.
I understand my social fundamentals are far from perfect. They're not going to become perfect anytime soon. I'll see how well I retain the skills I learnt this week while having a new focus next week.
I planned for the outing to be from 1-5pm then I would have dinner and run some errands from 5-6pm at the mall where I was gaming
I left the house at 1245 and got to the location roughly at about 110pm
The location for this outing
A set of 2 malls that are actually quite far away from each other but are linked by a very long underground walkway along which there are shops and even the underground walkway can be busy with shoppers
Social momentum interaction (Will abbreviate to SMI) 1
I walk from the building where I parked my vehicle to one of the malls and pass by the smoking corner. I see this girl in a colourful dress smoking and I open her. I do some fun opener I can't remember.
Here I was not approaching with intent just to start building my momentum. Less than 15s afyter I open, her friend comes and stands really close to her. I just exit the conversation
SMI 2
I walk to the taxi stand of the mall and see a guy wearing a bike helmet and waiting around. I stand next to him and just casually ask him a question and then we start bantering. We banter for 3-4 mins. I count this as warm-up interaction 1.
Time check: 1:15pm
SMI 3
At the same taxi stand, I see a mother and her 4-5 year old daughter and I think the mother's fashion is really elegant so I thought I would open with that because I'm not approaching with intent
I get blown off
SMI 4
I enter the mall and go to the basement where there is a fountain. In general, over the past week I've found that old people are always the most willing to talk to strangers and banter around so I sit next to old guy at the fountain and we banter for 3-4 minutes. I count this as warm-up interaction 2
SMI 5
I walk to the popcorn shop nearby and pretend to look at the many different types of popcorn on display. I banter with the female shopkeeper for 3-4 minutes and find out about an interesting popcorn brand. I count this as warm up interaction 3
SMI 6
I go to an area where there are benches and some people sitting there waiting around for something. I open this middle-aged looking Japanese woman and she seems kind of uncomfortable to talk to me but I just joke with her in a friendly way and connect with her briefly. After 1-2 mins, she just awkwardly looks down at her phone. She mentioned her family
Here I was not approaching with intent. I count this as my 4th warm-up interaction.
Over the past week, at this stage I would try to find a 5th person to talk to to warm up OR if I along the way saw girls I liked, I could start approaching with intent
Time check at this time: 145pm
Sudden Approach anxiety
I see this girl in a flamboyant red dress with white flowery patterns in high heels walking very confidently and I think to myself ok I want to approach her. For some reason, my mind starts getting scared because of how dense and close together everything is in the basement shopping district of this mall.
There's definitely more pressure to approach here than other places. tons of people in restaurants and shopkeepers and sales people line the walkways and I feel a lot of pressure so I give up on approaching this girl and chill out for a few minutes because the anxiety is suddenly getting to me
I seriously take a moment to chill out and decide to go do more casual talking to build more positivity (Good troubleshooting here)
The thing to note at this stage was that I was actually feeling quite socially warmed up but that mixed in with the social momentum was a burst of AA
SMI 7
I go back to the sitting area around the fountain and sit next to an average looking girl. I use an indirect opener and she looked slightly amused because she probably thought I was hitting on her. She blew me off my just looking at her phone and not responding to me when I asked her 2 or 3 questions.
Here I'm not approaching with intent. I keep my cool and as I try to start the conversation maintain the social fundamentals that I'm training as best I can. I get blown off but walk out of interaction quite happy with myself
SMI 8
I go to the ground floor to the taxi stand and try to talk to this guy at the taxi stand and ask him 2 or 3 questions with genuine interest and this guy ignores me so here I get blown of again... By a guy... HAHA
I don't let the blow-offs affect me. Honestly, Somehow from these blow-offs I realise how secure and independent I am because in spite of these I'm still keeping my cool
Time check: 2:05pm
Approach 1
So I went into a different place which was the link to a different Mall from the train station. I see a cute girl waiting for the drinks that she was buying and I approach her with intent.
I keep the body language under control but the pace of my asking questions was bad. The good thing was that I was conscious about my fking up of the questions that I was asking her/the pace with which I did it.
I got into some kind of a 4-5 min conversation with her while she waits for her drink and then she goes and gets her drink. She gives me her instagram and I can tell from her facial expressions it's not at all going to go anywhere but I keep my cool decently.
She was actually about to walk off, but then I as casually as possible asked her out. And she said yes, but it felt kind of shaky. I then asked her if she was single and she said no. Then she said it's fine to just make friends lol. Good practice here though I fked it up.
Approach 2
I go back up to the taxi stand and as I'm exiting the mall to the taxi stand I see a girl I want to talk to so as she's walking to me I wave to her and say hi from the front. I suppose I performed it rather weakly/needily. I could have performed it with more power and force.
I get blown off without her even stopping.
Time check 2:30
Approach 3
I went into the mall and I saw a girl standing outside the art gallery around some high class shops and I approach her by side-stopping her. This approach was ridiculously needy from me. The anxiety was hitting me directly during the approach.
I lost control of my speech because I did not know what to say. I was trying to conceal the anxiety and neediness but during this interaction even if I tried to even the concealment was not successful
I decide to do some damage control here because of the blow offs and I decide to just chill out and rebuild momentum. (Credits to me for that things improved for the better)
SMI 9
I walk into the meat jerky shop and banter with the 2 sales girls for 5-6 minutes and one of them is quite cute. I make them laugh pretty hard and I have quite a good time with them. This helped me recover quite significantly from an initially rather negative/unmotivated mood I was in from the blow-offs
Approach 4
I do into the supermarket and I approach a Korean American girl and she said that she had a boyfriend and didn't look like she was about to budge on that so I exit the conversation
Approach 5
In the same supermarket, I use the arm-tap to open a girl in the wine section and open by saying that I her hair style and I very rarely see someone with such a hair style. She seems genuinely grateful to me for the compliment but then blows me off by just seriously telling me she's occupied on a texting conversation with someone on her phone
Time check: 3pm
Approach 6 and 20 min insta-date
I went into the food court at the top floor of the shopping mall I see this cute girl in very plain clothes sitting down alone on one of the tables and I approach her standing and sort of towering over her. I ground my opener casually and then compliment her style and she seems very happy that I opened her.
She says it's very awkward that I'm talking to her while standing and I just play it off and keep my cool even though almost everyone in the surrounding tables is watching. I do eventually agree that we should get more comfortable so we move to sit at a different table that is empty and we have an insta-date.
Throughout the insta-date, I deflect her questions about my identity and watch my body language but my verbal game is not great. For some reason, she gets testy. Good thing is that she leaned in towards me way more times than I leaned in towards her (maximum 2 times and of very small degree)
The failure here was to get intermediate investment and buidling an easier compliance ladder I believe. Wasan't worrying about this today though so no problem
I ask her out to a date next week, and persist in my asking about 3 times over the course of the 20 min insta-date. At the end of the date, I gave up and just left. Good experience.
Time check 3:30 p.m.
SMI 10
I see this old guy dressed in jeans and a button down shirt leaning his legs over the public bench outside the food hall like a rebel and I talk to him and have a conversation for about 10-15 minutes. Quite interesting.
A lot people are watching me talk to this old guy who teaches at one of the universities and the girl I approach next also sees me talking to him.
Approach 7
I exit the conversation with the old guy after getting quite a lot of attention from the surrounding girls and guys (stares and looks and smiles and respect)
I think to myself fk it just go appraoch this girl in her pink shirt and slim grey pants. I open with my favorite confident attire opener. The funny part is that I literally fumble on the opener, I fail to say the sentence properly... But then I recover from it and then following that my body language and conversation goes very smoothly for the next 1 minute
She says she's from Australia and is a designer but then she exits the conversation because she's not comfortable talking to strangers and I let her go. I believe that the thing that was needed here was a hard push which I am not worrying about during this outing so no worries.
I was able to be so smooth with the conversation because I made a very good effort to listen to every single word she said and the way in which she said every single word.
Time check: 355pm
Approach 8
I went to the basement again and did another approach and got blown off. Delivered compliment twice and as a result looked stupid
SMI 11 & 12
I try to have conversations with 2 different guys and both of them happen very awkwardly. This puts me in a rather unmotivated state of mind.
For the first guy, he was of rather senior age and halfway through the conversation with me his wife and kid arrived so it abruptly stopped.
The second guy was young and the conversation was plain awkward.
Time check 415pm
I change venues by walking the long underground walkway into the rather faraway but larger 2nd mall.
At this stage, I was losing motivation to approach and getting in my head a lot. I told myself to just take action and do some approaches. Not that I was feeling very negative but quite unexcited
Approach 9
I went to the bus stop outside the mall and I did an actual approach using Alek's opener: walk past the girl then walk back. This 2nd mall also happens to be adjacent to a 3rd mall where I recently started taking street-dance classes and I find out that she takes classes at the same studio as me so I drop the intent and have a friend's conversation with her
and we agree to look forward to catching each other at the dance studio maybe even tomorrow or during a separate week.
Approach 10
I walking along the walkways of this 2nd mall and I see this girl who I did not approach about 2 minutes a go. I wave to her from the front and say "hi!" as she was walking to me and I emit the friendly-dog vibe rather successfully but she just shakes her head ignores me and blows me off without stopping.
I don't get too affected by it and just laugh it off. I did have a good opener (confident walk) but I didn't manage to use it because I couldn't even stop her.
Approach 11
I follow this girl towards the taxi stand of the large 2nd mall I'm in. I really like this girl. I found her fasion to be both striking and confident. Here I didn't actually deliver my opener perfectly either. But the good thing here was that I liked her style so much that the sincereness of the imperfect delivery made a difference.
The conversation started QUITE awkwardly but I saved it from worse by listening hard to every word she said and the way she said it. And asked her more interesting questions.
I managed to keep the social power fundamentals under sufficient control. She was apparently waiting for her friend at the taxi stand and 2-3 minutes into our conversation her friend arrived and the conversation was quite awkward so she exited to see her friend. I didn't want to worry about it too much so I made no attempt to hard push and let her walk towards her friend
It was roughly around 440/445pm so this was roughly the end of the outing. In general what I would do at this stage is run my errands, and use the remaining social momentum from previous approaches in case I saw anyone I liked along the way while running my errands
Ran my errands and had dinner
Time here was about 545pm
Approach 12
Walked back to the 1st mall to run one last errand. Saw a girl in a plain but elegant one-piece orange dress while I was inside the supermarket. Did not approach her initially. Though I felt quite quite a lot of sexual desire towards her.
Just as I paid for my groceries and was exiting the supermarket, I noticed her leaving the supermarket too ahead of me
I simply run up to her and successfully arm tap side stop her and she stopped and I opened with a "I really like your look". She looked at me and I could tell she was quite attracted to me.
Unfortunately, the place where I approached her, had a lot of sales girls standing around doing nothing and even I noticed from my side vision that one of them was fking openly staring at us.
My girl was directly facing that sales girl and my guess was that there was social pressure on her not to interact with me. Girl exits with a "Sorry I need to go and see my friend" and starts walking away.
Skills that I am deliberately training in this outing
Advice on social momentum from HTMGC:
The simple concept of building social momentum and then maintaining social momentum.
Today, when I am building/maintaining social momentum, I am not going to specifically talk to women unless circumstances are easy to do so.
Before I do my first approach, I will talk to 5 different people.
If I for some reason get particularly negative, I will stop approaching, and go and talk to 2 new people. That's it. Not that hard to fk it up.
After rebuilding social momentum and positivity, I will start approaching again.
Chase does not specifically state but it seems quite evident that in building social momentum he recommends that u build social momentum with new women. I will get to this stage soon enough. For today, it's just going to be talk to sufficient numbers of whoever (guys or girls).
Advice on the fundamental of using the law of least effort in conversation from HTMGC:
In general, putting in as little effort as possible.
Ignoring insults and never getting defensive
Expressing ideas concisely and to the point not only with words
Deflecting requests for compliance, using ambiguity and statements like "maybe later"
Learning to make the other person try to get your attention
In general, appearing independent and secure.
At the core, not needing the other person's approval, acceptance, or interest.
Lessons learnt
1. Throughout this outing, there were a lot of beautiful girls that I did not approach. The excuse that I made was that the edge to their beauty is not an edge that I am personally very attracted to even though other guys may have found it attractive. I believe I cannot afford to be giving up approaches like this. Something will have to be done about this and I will follow up with a solution.
2. I have this harmful mindset, where I'm not willing to follow girls too far to approach them. A lot of times, girls are already completely aware that I am going to approach them before I approach them. They can tell purely from reflections in the glass on shops, shadows on the ground, some person walking particularly quickly (me). What this leads to is some girls putting themselves in particularly difficult scenarios in which to be approached.
E.g. Walking into a shop, choosing to get on the escalator, etc. The solution to this is to interpret this as a sign that she does not want to look easy and wants to test my social calibration and creativeness. I won't implement this immediately but the eventual goal is to whenever this happens make sure that I pursue the approach and make it happen no matter what. As long as the approach circumstances do not happen too awkwardly, I will make the approach.
3. Clear skills that I am lacking as apparent throughout the approaches documented in this field report are: Getting investment and compliance, Making the hard push when necessary,
Another skill that is not well-documented over here but I have noticed throughout my outings this week is connection-building and deep-diving.
4. There are actually a lot of approaches where I don't put a lot of effort into the opening and just get blown off, like at least twice when trying to say hi from the front. I should avoid doing these. These are not difficult to avoid.
5. Quite happy with how I managed my positive attitude and emotional state throughout this outing. There were actually quite a couple of instances (more than I normally experience) where things were going downhill. I had the discipline to chill out, rebuild social momentum, and each time some miracle happened where I my positivity and mental state recovered. Not too bad.
This concludes the end of my first week of skill-building of skills from "How To Make Girls Chase". In the week following this, I will start working on a different skill from How To Make Girls Chase. Hopefully while maintaining my progress in the skills I was deliberately training this week.
I understand my social fundamentals are far from perfect. They're not going to become perfect anytime soon. I'll see how well I retain the skills I learnt this week while having a new focus next week.
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