Mental?

[IVGuy]

I'm back again.

I haven't been approaching but I've been reading books. No, not books on how to be a charmer where you are told to do everything but practice. I haven't got practice but I did stumble on a helpful book. The Power of Now. I'm fine with spirituality but I have a tolerance. The book never goes insane with the deities or some nirvana stuff so far. What it propositions to the reader is how to be present. How to be in the now. How to be at this very moment alive and not taken by the mind. I thought it was new age stuff that didn't resonate but I found the meditation practices and staying present great. Not to mention, my mind finally turned off. I didn't have to think, just do. Thus, eye contact haven't felt like a problem. Tension was there but I didn't feel the overwhelming fear of THINKING that something would go wrong or THINKING I'm staring.

Basically, I could make my choices and tone down my anxiety all the way down.

The reason I bring this up is that a few days ago, a girl openly asked for my number for a study group and I agreed to help her. I'm taking things at face value but my mind keeps playing thoughts like oh it won't happen or your not good enough or doing some scenario of something that doesn't happen. The book presents this as false time or imagining something that hasn't happened yet or already happened and needs to be let go to move forward. So, I used a few tricks to block these thoughts and anxiety to be present and not focus on what COULD happen, onnly that whatever happens, happens.

Is Pickup a complete mental game to be fit, confident and to no longer be plagued by past results? I used to be anti-social thanks to my social upbringing. Now in college, I'm no longer like this but these thoughts linger unconsciously. I'm asking the veterans if this whole idea of picking up women is mental and also on experiences to help fuel your practice and cognitive skills. Cause this one book is making life and as a byproduct, inner game a breeze.

 

[Richard]

I like what I see in this post.

When you peel back the bullshit excuses and reasons people come up with for "life" you'll see that absolutely everything is dependent upon your mental capabilities. You are in control of your thoughts and feelings when you dig down but sadly, most people either do not understand this or can not accept it because it's easier to assign blame than take responsibility.

Anyway, a short answer is yes, pick-up and game is all mental. Confidence is a state of being (mental), becoming fit takes dedication and patience (mental), being plagued by the past (mental). Everything boils down to how in control you are of your conscious.

You've just caught a glimpse of the world I've been shown to walk around in and it's a place full of nothing but possibilities. I haven't read that book you mentioned (The Power of Now) so I'll have to check it out if it's given you this much insight. Seems like you're into books about spirituality (not to confused with religion) so I have a ton of books I could recommend if you want to do some further reading on this subject.

-Richard

 

[IVGuy]

I like what I see in this post.

When you peel back the bullshit excuses and reasons people come up with for "life" you'll see that absolutely everything is dependent upon your mental capabilities. You are in control of your thoughts and feelings when you dig down but sadly, most people either do not understand this or can not accept it because it's easier to assign blame than take responsibility.

Anyway, a short answer is yes, pick-up and game is all mental. Confidence is a state of being (mental), becoming fit takes dedication and patience (mental), being plagued by the past (mental). Everything boils down to how in control you are of your conscious.

You've just caught a glimpse of the world I've been shown to walk around in and it's a place full of nothing but possibilities. I haven't read that book you mentioned (The Power of Now) so I'll have to check it out if it's given you this much insight. Seems like you're into books about spirituality (not to confused with religion) so I have a ton of books I could recommend if you want to do some further reading on this subject.

-Richard

I was always given the advice from books to do practices or to do this and do that but my neurotic mind suggested otherwise or tried to not bring me pain so it tried to not get me hurt. An example was when someone asked if I could help jump start their car. I got nervous and fidgety not because I was asked but because I didn't know. My mind rationalized that if I didn't know something, to not go near it or do it or defer to someone else to avoid humiliation or fear of fucking up. And I only noticed this when I read the book. I've been doing this unconsciously for years now. And I just turned twenty.

So, with women, talking and chatting is something I didn't know and rather than try, I backed away cause I didn't want to fuck up or be laughed at or humiliated. When in reality, none of those options will happen unless I really fucked up.

I'm not into spirituality too much. I've read No More Mr. Nice guy and Models but they do plenty in exposing the fake thoughts portraying in the mind but relies on actions, not in thoughts. A neurotic like myself found solace in Power of Now in staying conscious and being healthy. I'm in college and play video games to a certain extent. I found success in both when I drain out thoughts and focus hard at the task. AKA, staying conscious.

Notably, when I felt weak, or lack confidence is when I'm thinking these thoughts when it's far from the truth. I'm open to recommendations but I highly recommend the book in the presentation and simple exercises that makes one feel terrific in a matter of minutes.

 

[Richard]

I tried writing a few responses but couldn't come up with anything I liked. There's simply too much to try and convey with text and it just isn't working out.

So, I'll sum it up with I totally understand where you're coming from. I have a lot of the same qualities that you're describing about yourself with the exception that I wasn't into spirituality until I had a mentor introduce me to it. Over the course of this year I've opened up to it a lot and while you may not realize it you've done the same thing by learning to be "present," and that's a cornerstone lesson of what Lao Tzu wrote in the Tao Te Ching. I would highly recommend you look into Taoism and Lao Tzu.

Here are a few examples of lessons to found in his poetry:

• Allow yourself moments of Yin silence. They are the basis for everything in our lives, they are the blank canvas in our lives.
• Developing consciousness in your life at all times allows you to have options and choices at any given time. Your body always knows what it's doing, and it guides you as long as you don't get in your own way. Always having a soft focus allows you to remain open to what is going around you, while intense is focus is limited and provides tunnel vision.
• Everything cycles between on and off; consciousness and unconsciousness. Remain in a place of stillness and see what opens up to you.
• Clay is shaped into a bowl, but the usefulness of the bowl lies in the empty inside. The usefulness of an object lies in what it is not. Empty yourself of everything, let your mind become still, in this way the universe surrenders to you.

If you find yourself relating to any of these then I'd recommend you take a look at Lao Tzu's teachings. They can be hard to sift through, and what worked for me was breaking them down one by one, focusing on only a few poems per day. I'd also recommend the following books;

• The Path of Least Resistance by Robert Fritz
• Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers
• The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck
• A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle
• As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

-Richard

 

[IVGuy]

I tried writing a few responses but couldn't come up with anything I liked. There's simply too much to try and convey with text and it just isn't working out.

So, I'll sum it up with I totally understand where you're coming from. I have a lot of the same qualities that you're describing about yourself with the exception that I wasn't into spirituality until I had a mentor introduce me to it. Over the course of this year I've opened up to it a lot and while you may not realize it you've done the same thing by learning to be "present," and that's a cornerstone lesson of what Lao Tzu wrote in the Tao Te Ching. I would highly recommend you look into Taoism and Lao Tzu.

Here are a few examples of lessons to found in his poetry:

• Allow yourself moments of Yin silence. They are the basis for everything in our lives, they are the blank canvas in our lives.
• Developing consciousness in your life at all times allows you to have options and choices at any given time. Your body always knows what it's doing, and it guides you as long as you don't get in your own way. Always having a soft focus allows you to remain open to what is going around you, while intense is focus is limited and provides tunnel vision.
• Everything cycles between on and off; consciousness and unconsciousness. Remain in a place of stillness and see what opens up to you.
• Clay is shaped into a bowl, but the usefulness of the bowl lies in the empty inside. The usefulness of an object lies in what it is not. Empty yourself of everything, let your mind become still, in this way the universe surrenders to you.

If you find yourself relating to any of these then I'd recommend you take a look at Lao Tzu's teachings. They can be hard to sift through, and what worked for me was breaking them down one by one, focusing on only a few poems per day. I'd also recommend the following books;

• The Path of Least Resistance by Robert Fritz
• Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers
• The Road Less Traveled by Scott Peck
• A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle
• As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

-Richard

I'm not saying hey, I don't have to cold approach anymore!!! That's foolish. Truly foolish. We need experience to grow. I'm not into the PUA because I favor and love emotions more than some pointless interaction with sex. However, before one can even get there, they have to be a great man. A social, charismatic man. And I'm building my body, mind and spirit to be that man. Ironically, an amazon reviewer complained that some of the teachings were straight out of lao tzu or possibly taking multiple Chinese practices and claiming as his own. But the techniques are important.

Outside of the clay, damn near everything has been stated inside the book. In a different writing but might as well be the same thing verbatim. Regardless how one finds it, the advice is sound and necessary for healthy living .

Eckhart Tolle is the author of Power of Now and I will be reading A New Earth once I finish the book. I'll also keep a tab on the others solely to boost my mental capabilities and healthier lifestyle. Thank you for the recommendations and personal experiences Richard. Good luck on the field.