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Miss Starbucks Earings

James D

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 23, 2017
Messages
695
Gentlemen!

I am PUMPED to write this lay report!

This lay means a lot to me especially because I set out to solve two major sticking points:

First being hopelessness and defeat as a string of SIX girls never replying after what I deemed to be successful cold approaches. I posted it about it here https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/why-the-hell-is-this-happening.28083/

...and received some excellent advice from our members.

Second one was compliance, which I posted about here: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/compliance-momentum-as-a-sticking-point.28049/#post-166553

So today (Sunday), I set out to begin Chase's good ol' and lethally effective "Approach 4 girls a day for 30 days" challenge.

I ended up approaching 7 girls and number closed all 7 of them (I attribute that to luck more than anything else but hey, good for the ego)

Above all, I sought to keep the interactions maximum 5 minutes long, before grabbing the number and exiting.

The girl I layed was the 4th approach and it was a same day lay (she left my apartment around ten minutes ago)

I'll go into detail on the approach and summarize the date itself, so it should be a fast read.

The Approach

I'm walking out of a mall after three successful cold approaches within less than 30 minutes. I put my headphones on and decide to head back to my apartment to finish my work. Then, next magazine stand (they still have those lol?), I spot a gorgeous girl standing. She is wearing an elegant yet casual long green dress. Dresses... they do something to me... A girl who makes herself look extra feminine evokes something ancient within me.

My feet start moving before my mind can react.

Soon enough, I'm in front of her.

"Excuse me..."

She turns and smiles.

I'm about to launch into the compliment but something catches my eye, something absolutely riddiculous....

I dramatically act outraged and point at her earings.

"Are these... seriously... STARBUCKS cups?"

Yes, her earings were mini Starbucks cups.

The way I said it, the faux dramatic outrage, she can't help but erupt in laughter.

Her laugh, btw, is angel-like.

I keep my over dramatic exasperation and add:

"Look, I was coming over here to tell you how absolutely gorgeous you look in that dress... so feminine, so elegant... but NOW, these Starbucks cups? You better have a good explanation for those!"

She shakes even more of laughter.

I get closer and gently grab one of the earings.

I move my head from left to right, outraged.

HER: "I can expIain, I can explain!" She's still laughing.

ME: I'm all ears (faux serious)

HER: "So...stop looking at me like that!" She erupts in laughter again as I maintain my faux scandalized face.

ME: "Like what?"

HER: "You're making me laugh!"

ME: "Hey, I'm not the one with Starbucks cups swinging on each ear here!"

She laughs even more and I start laughing, breaking character.

ME: "Jokes asides tho, they look pretty cool. But yeah, there must be a story behind that."

HER: "Hahah thanks, well yes, my little cousin gifted me these and I promised her I would wear them!"

ME: "Well, it's honourable that you're respecting that promise, I salute you" (I do the formal salute sign)

HER: "Thanks!"

ME: "I'm James btw"

HER: "Elena!"

Handclasp.

I keep holding her hand.

ME: "Where are you from, Elena?"

HER: "Italy! Been working here for 3 years now. And yourself?"

ME: "Try to guess" ;)

HER: "I have no clue! America?"

ME: "Hahaha, no, never been to the US actually."

HER: "Wait... France? Your accent..."

ME: "Not bad... French is my native language but Im from (COUNTRY)"

HER: "Wow I've heard of it but never met anyone from there!"

ME: "Well, today's your lucky day"

HER: "Indeed!"

ME: "So, what are you up to right now?"

HER: "I'm meeting my girlfriends, we're gonna grab ice cream and then head to the harbour for the fireworks."

ME: "Oh yes, it's today, i almost forgot."

HER: "Yes! Are you going?"

ME: "Would love to but I got so much work to finish. I'm sure it'll be great!"

HER: "Yeah I've never seen fireworks at the harbour so I hope will be great!"

ME: "You're in for a treat then. Hey, look, Elena, I gotta head back to my apartment to complete my work but... it was so cool meeting you. Would love to get a coffee with you one of those days and hear about how you choose your earings."

She laughs again.

HER: "Sure. Do you use Whatsapp?"

We exchange numbers. I send her a message on the spot so she gets my number.

Two hours later, I send her a text saying it was cool to meet her and to enjoy the fireworks.

She replies almost immediately.

I catch myself drooling over her WhatsApp profile pic a couple times before putting my phone away.

Two or three hours later, she sends me a screenshot from an IG story announcing that, in addition to the 7 p.m fireworks, there will be additional fireworks at 9 p.m.

"Hope you can catch the 9p.m one!"

I reply saying that I'll be in the area around this time, so I should make it.

"Oh, cool. I'll be hanging out there too actually."

"Cool, we can watch it together."

And she replies "Sure, would love to :)"

The Date

Compliance... Compliance... Compliance.

My sticking point. I had to beat it.

I decide to focus solely on compliance, trusting myself to build a connection and escalate touch and proximity, which I'm very comfortable with now.

From the moment I meet her, I start building compliance.

I run my game as per usual.

As we're standing around the harbour, I deep dive her a bit, my hand on the small of her back the whole time (thank you Zan Perrion) and building compliance.

At some point, I mention the book I'm writing, which gets her very curious. I tell her it's in french but I still wanna show it to her. She says sure.

Fireworks illuminate the sky and everyone goes crazy, their phones out. She's standing in front of me, my hand around her waist.

Escalation Window

HER: "You know, when the fireworks are over, people are gonna flood to the metro. Maybe we should leave now, while they are still watching the fireworks?"

ME: "You're absolutely right, let's go."

HER: "Where tho?"

ME: "I'm tired of big crowds... let's head back to my place and I'll show you the book I'm writing."

HER: "Ohhh yes, I'd love to see your book.

Yeah, right.

My Place

I show her the printed chapter one of my book.

She looks at it for 5 seconds and then puts it away.

I pull her in for a kiss.

She kisses back.

I pull away first.

"You taste amazing."

"Thank you."

I return to kissing her.

No LMR.

Altho, she did pause the escalation for a moment to take off her Starbucks earings.

"Don't want them to fall off!"

I smile and shake my head at those riddiculous earings.

She smiles back and lies down with me.
 
Last edited:

Gram

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Oct 5, 2022
Messages
65
Great report, @James D.

I really like how grounded you were to open under one plan and immediately play on the earrings, which seemed to be the hook (and a lot more fun to discuss!)

One question on compliance as it seemed you nailed it. Plenty of articles to read but can you elaborate on what you did for compliance with this girl?
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

Zoro

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Messages
1,124
Seems like it was one of those match ups where there was instant chemistry. Well done staying consistent and not giving up.

Meeting women can be strange like that, lots of dismal rejections or almosts, and then you meet a girl where things flow effortlessly.

I have a question for you on the first sticking point. What would you say you did during this interaction to address it? Seems like on this occasion you had a real time constraint and things ended initially on a high note. Then later on you took the initiative once it was the right time to invite her home.
 

James D

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 23, 2017
Messages
695
Great report, @James D.

I really like how grounded you were to open under one plan and immediately play on the earrings, which seemed to be the hook (and a lot more fun to discuss!)

One question on compliance as it seemed you nailed it. Plenty of articles to read but can you elaborate on what you did for compliance with this girl?
Thanks man!

Read the post where I talked about it being my sticking point and see Chase's reply on the mindset/philosophy behind compliance.

My sticking point was not about generating compliance, done usually by good fundamentals, building a connecting and stimulating her...

Rather, my sticking point was on the momentum side of compliance.

That is, once the compliance generated, how do you take that compliance generated and lead things forward?

The distinction is important because simply increasing compliance momentum when no compliance is generated might not always work.

(although, it may. If a girl is attracted to you at the begining, i.e. some compliance is present, you can simply pile up requests and move her until you sleep with her)

So, to drive the interaction forward, I requested her to do things.

Like:

"stand over here"

"Move here"

"Tell me about X"

"Now tell me about Y"

"Ok so you told me about X and Y, but how does that impact Z?"

"Let's go this way"

"Turn here, you'll see the fireworks better"

Things like that scaterred throughout the interaction.

I skipped this part because I would have had to get into minute detail of the interaction and would have taken forever to write xD
 

James D

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 23, 2017
Messages
695
Seems like it was one of those match ups where there was instant chemistry. Well done staying consistent and not giving up.

I have a question for you on the first sticking point. What would you say you did during this interaction to address it? Seems like on this occasion you had a real time constraint and things ended initially on a high note.
Thanks man!

And yeah, it's strange how day game works sometimes.

For the first sticking point, my main goal with this interaction and everyone before her was to drive the conversation to the first high point, grab the number and exit.

I had a semi genuine time contraint. I could have hung around and chatted more. Truth be told, I wanted to but I resisted the urge.

Meeting women can be strange like that, lots of dismal rejections or almosts, and then you meet a girl where things flow effortlessly.
For sure!

Then later on you took the initiative once it was the right time to invite her home.
Yes, I had planned the date in such a way that we would drop by my place after the fireworks.

However, her suggestion mid fireworks that we better get going now to avoid the crowd was the signal to ditch the fireworks.
 

James D

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Jul 23, 2017
Messages
695
I like the positive vibes around this, and the positive regard in which you seem to hold the woman.
Always positive vibes, respect and empathy.
I hope the sex was good
Hahaha it was!

In the first draft of the post, there was the sex part in detail but decided to ommit it.

I guess Im not so comfortable being graphic lol

Overall, it was amazing.

Spent a lot of time post sex talking and spreading good vibes.

She visited me today as well :)
 

HoofHearted

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 10, 2022
Messages
461
Always positive vibes, respect and empathy.

Hahaha it was!

In the first draft of the post, there was the sex part in detail but decided to ommit it.

I guess Im not so comfortable being graphic lol

Overall, it was amazing.

Spent a lot of time post sex talking and spreading good vibes.

She visited me today as well :)

That's a good job.

I am so 50/50 about whatever these "reports" are, and I myself would probably never write one, unless I was 100% communicative about it with the woman I was sharing about. It's not really a moral question, but an examination of what really makes my interactions work.

No doubt these "reports" do amuse me a lot when they're well written. There's a guy around here who writes them and literally makes me lol

And sometimes I read them and see the big yikes with how some of these dudes perceive things.
 
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