Understandble. Before mentioning what's good I'd clarify the importance of being yourself, the you that has accumulated 20 years of different experiences. Do not try to discard that because you think it will make you more interesting for girls, it won't. Stand for who you are and keep refining your calibration when using your social skills.
And here they come, the pitfalls. It has nothing really to do with your specific personality when girls or guys don't like you but more how you calibrate with them, you may look awkward, you don't accept them or you say a sentence a bit wrong, or you simply don't trust yourself enough to say out loud what you mean and with confidence and this has nothing to do with your own personality but more in how your personality connects with others'. So unless you eat children for breakfast your own background should hardly mean anything when having fun with people, it's all in the connection between you, which needs calibration depending on situations.
My recomendations are to get confidence in what you are. Improve what you already like and want to do and skip the things you don't like, to improve your confidence further. With confidence you'll be more relaxed when socializing, and people feel that vibe.
When in conversations try to say what's on your mind at times. You may burn your fingers but without failures there won't be success. Later on you'll learn you can say almost anything if you're good at calibration (is the person in a bad/good mood, has it been built up? do you do it with a smile etc.).
Biggest factor is to keep going even if you have a bad day and felt it went shit. Go home and work on what went right and wrong and be prepared for the next day. Those who can see their failures as success are those who improve the best. Remember to have fun with it as well and don't expect to be an expert within a year if seduction is a rare thing in one's life. Hope it helps.
I'll add onto your wise words with this.