FR My mind went blank.....what do you do in these situations?

[sneaky_charm]

Hey guys!

If you have read my last report about my first cold approach date, then let me tell you that I was able to get one more girl out. But that girl is nothing special, and although I suppose she is attracted to me, I don't think I'm too interested in her.

Anyway, this report is about yesterday.

So I'm sitting in the stairs of a mall, and I see this girl walk from the right side of the mall to the left side, again after half a minute, she walks in reverse. I do not notice if she leaves the premises or not.

Fast forward 10 minutes or so, and I see the same girl sitting on the opposite side of the stairs, alone and examining her surroundings. She seems to take note of me, although I'm not certain of it.

I decide to take the plunge, and move toward her.

After I reach her, I notice her looking at another direction. I get her attention by telling her that I noticed her, and wanted to talk to her. At first, she does not understand, but after repeating, she does.

Then, SHE OFFERS HER HAND! What the fuck! That never happened to me. Always, I'm the one who extends hand first.

Anyway, I take her hand, and she does not take her hand back immediately, which is a good sign.

Till this point, everything was well and good. Then, it happened!

I ask "So, where are you studying?"
She replies "I am an assistant professor!"

For a moment, I went blank. I was thinking this girl was about 19 - 21. If she is an assistant professor, she must be at least 26! Terrible reading on my part. But don't blame me, the way she was dressed, although not revealing, was something only very young ones do.

So, as you may expect, I didn't push the interaction any longer, partly because I was dumbfounded in my own mind, and partly because I saw no hope since she was much older, as well as well-established.

I left after bidding her a good day ahead.

However, my mind has been analyzing the situation since yesterday, quite restlessly.

I want to know what you guys do in such situations when the girl is WAY OLDER than you are?

I am 20, and the main reason why my mind went blank was because I was CERTAIN that she was my age, and when she was not, it was a mental shock.

Anyway, what is the best course of action in such scenarios? Should I still go ahead? Should I just talk for a few minutes to understand older girls better, or for the sake of experience?

What would YOU have done?

- Kevin

 

[Thinkingenigma]

Re: My mind went blank.....what do you do in these situations?

That's when you joke with her that there's no way she's a professor, she's too cute for the job. Either that or acknowledge your mistake, but qualify it by joking about her apparent youth. Words don't particularly matter here, just try not to get flustered. Making a mistake like that is not a big deal, and honestly, she's probably flattered by it. Most assistant professors aren't that much older than the students they're teaching anyways.

 

[Richard]

Re: My mind went blank.....what do you do in these situations?

I'll say two things, maybe three

When my mind goes blank (and it does from time to time when I'm feeling socially exhausted) I have a few questions to fall back on. Kinda like my "Use only in case of emergency" questions that get people talking and I recommend that you create a few questions to keep in your head for those times where your mind goes blank.

In this case, your mind went blank while flirting and joking around and the only way to get better with joking and flirting is to do it more. Banter came relatively easily for me because my family is always joking and that's just how I grew up, but, a good exercise you can do is watch TV shows and try to make jokes at things characters say. The same can be used for learning to be more quick with sex/chase frames.

The other thing you can do when your head goes blank is to admit it: "Sorry, my mind just drew a blank. Tell me more about being an assistant professor." You only drew a blank because you were thinking about coming up with something clever to say here - and in reality, it's usually better just to say what's on your mind. For me, when I read what she said my immediate thought was:

"Hmm.. I've always had a fantasy about sleeping with a professor, but I guess you'll do "

So, as you may expect, I didn't push the interaction any longer, partly because I was dumbfounded in my own mind, and partly because I saw no hope since she was much older, as well as well-established.

No. No. No. Just no.

 

[sneaky_charm]

Re: My mind went blank.....what do you do in these situations?

That's when you joke with her that there's no way she's a professor, she's too cute for the job. Either that or acknowledge your mistake, but qualify it by joking about her apparent youth. Words don't particularly matter here, just try not to get flustered. Making a mistake like that is not a big deal, and honestly, she's probably flattered by it. Most assistant professors aren't that much older than the students they're teaching anyways.

Yeah, but since it was the first time something like this happened in my case, I did not know what to do. And oh well, after coming home I did realize that I could have said something along the lines "But you look too young, I thought you were 20 or something!" But alas!

the only way to get better with joking and flirting is to do it more. Banter came relatively easily for me because my family is always joking and that's just how I grew up, but, a good exercise you can do is watch TV shows and try to make jokes at things characters say. The same can be used for learning to be more quick with sex/chase frames.

I am no expert at this, but I like to believe that I have good flirting skills when my mind is relaxed. That is because when I'm relaxed, I find that I can make girls laugh whenever I want to, tease wherever I want to, imply sexual things, set frames and what not. Problem is, the situation was high pressure for me, and I was not relaxed. But your suggestion is very unique, I gotta try that! Chase frames while watching TV, wahahaha!

No. No. No. Just no.

Lol, I will sure push the interaction next time should something like this happen! And yeah, who doesn't fantasize about doing sexy professors! But that too, I remembered only when I reached home.