- Joined
- Jul 14, 2013
- Messages
- 230
I've been on break from school since the end of Wednesday but had spent three days non-stop studying. I was quite in my head as a result when I finally forced myself to go out last night.
For the past couple of months, I've mostly day-gamed, but now realize that focusing on night-time will improve my skills overall. I've especially noticed that my day game seems a little bit too-laid back for the momentum that I want to develop with progressing the interaction forward with girls. Gaining reference points of being high-energy during the night should spillover during the day. Also, I am training myself to game absolutely crystal-clear sober at night - no drinking.
I first hit up a bar where a band was playing live. Though it was midnight, there were relatively few people. Upon entering, I immediately spotted 2 girls standing and bantering at the empty bar. There were no seats around and they were right in my field of vision, but I chickened out. I checked out the music and the patrons out and really just tried to relax and enjoy myself. There were not a lot of customers and so it was hard for me to get some momentum.
After about 15 minutes, I said fuck it and went to another part of the bar where there were 4 girls. They were playing cornhole. I came up on two of them and made the mistake of not speaking right as I was coming to them. Instead, one of them happened to naturally turn her back to me, so I had to step around her and start speaking with her friend. I really just wanted to get in a light mood, so I decided to make fun of myself:
It's comical that this girl was also the least attractive of the group, but I really hadn't noticed that ahead of time, as I like to ignore that stuff to prevent approach anxiety and analysis from kicking in.
I eject. Really trying to incorporate humor and taking myself less seriously. In retrospect, could have made a joke out of it by asking her to introduce me to her friends, saying that they were my last chance for love cause I all I have is a fat girlfriend to come home to who I absolutely hate, etc (or some other gross exaggeration).
I chilled listening to the music and dancing a little bit by myself for another 10 minutes. I had noticed a couple of mature bleach blondes dancing. One was finally sitting down while the other had gone to the bathroom, so I went over to introduce myself. It was a very brief interaction, I just complimented her, introduced myself and then ejected. I should have probably stuck around to just prolong the conversation.
I listened to the music again and then noticed a set of who sat in an adjacent booth. Two of them left for the bathroom, so I decided to speak to them. Just as I was about to open my mouth, I realized it was the same cornhole group. My eyes locked with the bride-to-be and all I could mutter was, "Oh, it's you again." It felt comically awkward, I couldn't take it.
I decided to go to a bar in another part of town. It was about 1 when I got there - pretty happening place. There was also a (much louder) band here playing psychedelic music and it was pretty crowded up near the stage. Decent mix of girls. Lots of people in Halloween-themed outfits. Two girls sitting in a booth stood out because they were wearing sexy dresses (this was more of a rock type of place).
We were the last booth before the open area in front of the stage, and so it was really loud.
I asked about them and it turned out they were from Brazil, studying English. One of the girls seemed more enthusiastic to talk and the other one was colder. I asked them for their names and we had fun me trying to pronounce their names and them complimenting me.
But every time they replied, I had to tell them to speak louder and then lean in from my side of the table. Even though it was already around 1:15, I figured I just arrived, and didn't feel like having to keep leaning over. Now, in retrospect, what I realize didn't even cross my mind is that I should have at least asked to move them. This bar has a second floor that's much more conducive to conversation. It would have been worth a shot and I wouldn't have lost anything if they refused.
So I ejected from that one. They just kept sitting in the same booth for some time. Right after that, a short, chubby, black girl was getting up from a booth. She was about to say hi, but I pre-empted her.
We banter a bit more, she asks me what I do in town, etc. The convo takes the following turn:
Even though I'm not in the slightest attracted to her, I was just about to comply. This was the first time in my life (I think) that a girl I didn't know blatantly said she will buy me a drink. But just as I was about to do it, I got a better hold on myself. First of all, as I mentioned above, I'm not drinking. Second, complying to her command does not set a good tone. And third, even though I really want to lower my standards, this just seemed too easy. And at the end of the day, I wasn't attracted to her. So finally, after a 15-second pause
I stuck around for a bit more but there were few girls to initiate a conversation with. Finally, I noticed a gorgeous blonde return from the bar and she stood by herself in the open area in front of the stage, listening to the music.
I shook her hand and also hugged her hip. We bantered for a little bit about who she's here with and how she likes the music. Her friends weren't too far away so she excused herself to go back to them. How could I have improved this one?
I went back to the bar sipping my soda and then realized that the Brazilian girls were behind me talking to some dude. It was a bit awkward - I tried to reengage the cold aloof one, but to no avail. Well, now I see why - the window of opportunity had passed.
I did want to stay until 3 AM, closing time, to experience the dynamics, but it was 2:20 and there were relatively few girls. So I peaced. I'm an early bird, so one drawback of night game is the fact that I go to sleep late. I felt shitty when I got home because I have unrealistic expectations of what will happen and also because I just didn't have that much fun. I will focus on establishing a carefree vibe in the first part of the night (10 - 1AM) so that I'm easy-going and self-amused. Thoughts?
Writing this today is framing these events differently. Basically, nothing happened. But, I experienced just a little bit more to assist me in progressing forward. 改善 kaizen
For the past couple of months, I've mostly day-gamed, but now realize that focusing on night-time will improve my skills overall. I've especially noticed that my day game seems a little bit too-laid back for the momentum that I want to develop with progressing the interaction forward with girls. Gaining reference points of being high-energy during the night should spillover during the day. Also, I am training myself to game absolutely crystal-clear sober at night - no drinking.
I first hit up a bar where a band was playing live. Though it was midnight, there were relatively few people. Upon entering, I immediately spotted 2 girls standing and bantering at the empty bar. There were no seats around and they were right in my field of vision, but I chickened out. I checked out the music and the patrons out and really just tried to relax and enjoy myself. There were not a lot of customers and so it was hard for me to get some momentum.
After about 15 minutes, I said fuck it and went to another part of the bar where there were 4 girls. They were playing cornhole. I came up on two of them and made the mistake of not speaking right as I was coming to them. Instead, one of them happened to naturally turn her back to me, so I had to step around her and start speaking with her friend. I really just wanted to get in a light mood, so I decided to make fun of myself:
It's comical that this girl was also the least attractive of the group, but I really hadn't noticed that ahead of time, as I like to ignore that stuff to prevent approach anxiety and analysis from kicking in.
I eject. Really trying to incorporate humor and taking myself less seriously. In retrospect, could have made a joke out of it by asking her to introduce me to her friends, saying that they were my last chance for love cause I all I have is a fat girlfriend to come home to who I absolutely hate, etc (or some other gross exaggeration).
I chilled listening to the music and dancing a little bit by myself for another 10 minutes. I had noticed a couple of mature bleach blondes dancing. One was finally sitting down while the other had gone to the bathroom, so I went over to introduce myself. It was a very brief interaction, I just complimented her, introduced myself and then ejected. I should have probably stuck around to just prolong the conversation.
I listened to the music again and then noticed a set of who sat in an adjacent booth. Two of them left for the bathroom, so I decided to speak to them. Just as I was about to open my mouth, I realized it was the same cornhole group. My eyes locked with the bride-to-be and all I could mutter was, "Oh, it's you again." It felt comically awkward, I couldn't take it.
I decided to go to a bar in another part of town. It was about 1 when I got there - pretty happening place. There was also a (much louder) band here playing psychedelic music and it was pretty crowded up near the stage. Decent mix of girls. Lots of people in Halloween-themed outfits. Two girls sitting in a booth stood out because they were wearing sexy dresses (this was more of a rock type of place).
We were the last booth before the open area in front of the stage, and so it was really loud.
I asked about them and it turned out they were from Brazil, studying English. One of the girls seemed more enthusiastic to talk and the other one was colder. I asked them for their names and we had fun me trying to pronounce their names and them complimenting me.
But every time they replied, I had to tell them to speak louder and then lean in from my side of the table. Even though it was already around 1:15, I figured I just arrived, and didn't feel like having to keep leaning over. Now, in retrospect, what I realize didn't even cross my mind is that I should have at least asked to move them. This bar has a second floor that's much more conducive to conversation. It would have been worth a shot and I wouldn't have lost anything if they refused.
So I ejected from that one. They just kept sitting in the same booth for some time. Right after that, a short, chubby, black girl was getting up from a booth. She was about to say hi, but I pre-empted her.
We banter a bit more, she asks me what I do in town, etc. The convo takes the following turn:
Even though I'm not in the slightest attracted to her, I was just about to comply. This was the first time in my life (I think) that a girl I didn't know blatantly said she will buy me a drink. But just as I was about to do it, I got a better hold on myself. First of all, as I mentioned above, I'm not drinking. Second, complying to her command does not set a good tone. And third, even though I really want to lower my standards, this just seemed too easy. And at the end of the day, I wasn't attracted to her. So finally, after a 15-second pause
I stuck around for a bit more but there were few girls to initiate a conversation with. Finally, I noticed a gorgeous blonde return from the bar and she stood by herself in the open area in front of the stage, listening to the music.
I shook her hand and also hugged her hip. We bantered for a little bit about who she's here with and how she likes the music. Her friends weren't too far away so she excused herself to go back to them. How could I have improved this one?
I went back to the bar sipping my soda and then realized that the Brazilian girls were behind me talking to some dude. It was a bit awkward - I tried to reengage the cold aloof one, but to no avail. Well, now I see why - the window of opportunity had passed.
I did want to stay until 3 AM, closing time, to experience the dynamics, but it was 2:20 and there were relatively few girls. So I peaced. I'm an early bird, so one drawback of night game is the fact that I go to sleep late. I felt shitty when I got home because I have unrealistic expectations of what will happen and also because I just didn't have that much fun. I will focus on establishing a carefree vibe in the first part of the night (10 - 1AM) so that I'm easy-going and self-amused. Thoughts?
Writing this today is framing these events differently. Basically, nothing happened. But, I experienced just a little bit more to assist me in progressing forward. 改善 kaizen
