New Guy - A few Questions

[Desert Eagle]

Hello everybody! My name is Desert Eagle. I'm a 19 y/o guy in college with relatively little experience with women. In high school I tried with women, but new very little about them and ended up not getting anywhere past a few phone numbers and text conversations. The furthest I actually got with a girl was my best friend's date at Prom (he wasn't interested). It was great; I was hitting all the notes perfectly, and felt like I was in the zone. The only issue is that I was only using her to get the girl who I wanted as a girlfriend to get jealous, which worked.. but not in my favor as she just went into auto-rejection.

Then, I went to college, and fairly quickly got my first escalation to kissing/making out with a girl with an amazing body. I failed to escalate to sex even though I tried, but that most likely would've been extremely awkward because... I didn't really know what to do past getting to sex.

That's about all my experience with women up to this point. I was never "cool" or "popular" in high school. I was just a wise guy who cracked witty jokes in the middle of class. Never had many friends in high school.

Now, onto the questions.

1. Does anyone else feel like no-one wants to be approached? I constantly see people walking around quickly like they are in a hurry and want to avoid contact with others at all costs. I want to approach, but I find it extremely difficult to approach people when they seem so shut off to the world.

2. What does expert socialization look like? Never in my life have I experienced someone who was strong at socializing. Everyone bumbles along in conversation and it results in extreme awkwardness. I need something to emulate, but I haven't been able to find that. Everyone is as socially awkward as I am, there's just a few that are outgoing and therefore succeed.

3. Anyone want to take me under their wing, so to speak? I'm a great follower. If you tell me to do something, I'll do it and tell you what happened.

 

[TylerDurden]

I'm a beginner too, Tough I have an answer for 1
There are people that want to be approached, people that don't, and people that wouldn't mind it.
You can see it in the body language, for example in a nightclub if a girl is a little out of her group, dancing more or less alone, or looking around, she probably wants to be approached. In a shopping mall, if she looks kind of distracted looking some shop not really paying attention, I think she wouldn't mind being approached. and If she is in the street walking fast, she probably doesn't want it (but you never know!).
Also, sometimes people just walk fast out of habit, and some others are in autopilot, and If you try to talk to them it's like they thing you want to sell them something. You have to say something different/special to break that autopilot.

 

[Lexielai]

Hey Desert Eagle,

Glad to see more beginners joining the site! While I'm not nearly as experienced as some of the folks here, I think I know a few things that can help you out!

I agree that sometimes people seem shut off, but you really can't know until you try! I know it's hard, but you are going to want to approach every women you like if possible; even if they reject you, you'll still benefit! You might even find someone more willing to talk than they seem to be.

If you don't know what expert socialization looks like, you should probably start for looking for people that do! I myself have a hard time picturing it, but if you start roaming, going to events, hanging at popular spots, you may spot a cool, sociable guy. Otherwise, I believe movies are a good choice, as the actors often know what they're doing. Take it with a grain of salt, this is just guesswork from me.

See ya later,
-Alex

 

[BarryS1]

1. Does anyone else feel like no-one wants to be approached? I constantly see people walking around quickly like they are in a hurry and want to avoid contact with others at all costs. I want to approach, but I find it extremely difficult to approach people when they seem so shut off to the world.

New to game here too. Until beginning the 10-step newbie assignment, my philosophy was "there's a time and place for everything, especially seducing girls." I thought approaching girls in public places would yield the same terrible results I've heard by girls over the years. Experimenting for myself proved my assumptions dead wrong!

I got a mixed basket of reception during my first approach day, but guess what? It was not all bad! I could not believe a couple girls literally cracked like an egg with warmth after I said "Hi." I require more skills to push past simple conversation, but I am still amazed with what a little prodding could do.

Good luck to you! I wish I could have started that early in college, but I will make my last semester worth it (I'm 22).