Nightgame: Going out to have fun vs Going out to get laid

[RisingCane]

Kind of a field report but posting it as a thread because of a concept that I wanted to explore a bit with you all. Some schools of thought say that you should go out to have fun with your friends and others, especially one that I still kind of hold, say that you are at a bar or club to get girls so why not be real about it? TBH, I feel like in most cases, if it was not for the abundance of hot girls in some venues, I would never go out on weekends in the first place. I am slowly starting to prefer sleeping early, waking up early, and having a productive morning.

I did want to share what I have found though. For the Miami locals like @Skills, @DonGately, and @S.S Can (who I hung out with), IYKYK. For others, there is a venue near me called Barracudas which on Thursday nights, gets flooded with college girls. It is a small bar with a massive path outside of it where everyone hangs out. I have written about it in previous posts.

One thing I noticed is that ratios at the venue are awful, like 65% dudes at least. The vibe kind of matches how @Teevster described Southern Europe and its women. You get aggressive guys and so women have their guards up.

Going out with PUA wings a year or two ago here to get laid.

When I went out with former RSD dudes I knew and guys I met on a Game chat, including one Wing in particular, we were at it. Like it was so bad that one wing and I were gameplanning how we would approach the venue. We had many nights out there and very little to show for it in most cases. We ran into:

• Aggressive cockblocking
• Bad rejections at times from girls
• Lots of hot girls in large cliques

I was also kind of miserable at times because I felt like I was on a mission. However, as a competitive guy, this kind of suits my personality as well. I see Game as Game and something to be won and get better at. It is part of why the whole advice of "go out with the boys and have a good time" never really registered with me.

Going out with a friend or normal dude/natural.

Yesterday night, I was just out for a walk and a guy I made small talk with hits me up asking what I am up to. We run into each other constantly and as a result, we socialize. He is what I would say is a natural as he claims to have a lay count of over a 100 that he mainly got from the apps. Outgoing and suave East Coast Italian guy. I also met this jacked older Latino guy that dresses well a couple years ago who was more of a natural, we ran into him yesterday too.

We just sat at a table, chatted like friends, and got opened a couple of times by women too. None of the women were great looking.

Here is what I noticed now reflecting on it:

• Certainly had a more fun time
• Was not as intense or stressful

I felt the same way when I hung out with @S.S Can at the venue. We were just normal dudes chatting and had a chick or two open us.

But at the same time, there are drawbacks I see to going out to have a good time, well really one serious one. My tenacity and urge to go for girls I found hot? It was kind of gone. It's like the good times softened me up and took out that hunter mindset or that guy who can talk to the hot girls.

My thoughts on fixing this.

Here are some thoughts I had on fixing this.

• Going out with cool normal dudes like Italian guy, jacked Latino bro, and @S.S Can type of personalities who are folks you can introduce to your normal friends
• Do have that good time
• Hold yourself accountable to doing a small number of approaches, like say no more than 3

Its like when I go out with a PUA wing or PUA mindset, I am in that mode of talking to hot girls but it doesn't pan out. When I go out with cool dudes and have a good time, I have a good time but naturally feel like not in the state of talking to hot girls.

Anyone else ever been there?