Calls & Texts No Confirmation Texts

[Zoro]

I typically do not respond to texts like "Oh yeah, I'm busy this weekend." Or sometimes to texts like "I'm leaving now see you soon" (though I have no qualms responding to the latter and sometimes do)

Usually I feel as though some sort of response might be okay or better( like "ok" or "Ahh, well have a good weekend then.") But, I never seem to have any issue when I just do NOT respond.

Not sure what to think of that.

 

[Franco]

J Wick,

Generally I try to calibrate this to the girl as much as possible. If she seems to give confirmation texts, then I'll give confirmation texts as well. If she seems to refrain from confirmation texts, then I refrain from them as well.

It usually has to do with the girl's personality -- if she's very organized and adamant about being "sure" of things before acting, then giving her that confirmation text will help her feel like you are similar to her, and help her feel like she has "some" control over the situation (which is just enough control to get her out on the date).

If the girl is very aloof, then it's probably because she's very aware of social cues and men chasing her, and she also likes to make men chase by refraining from sending unnecessary texts. Of course, the best way to deal with this is to throw her off her game by also being aloof, which may in turn cause her to think she's being TOO aloof (and send you a text because she still wants to see you) or just hope that your "no confirmation" text means that you're still seeing her because she isn't used to guys not constantly texting her.

Mirroring her actions seem to work best for me here. =)

- Franco

 

[Zoro]

Ahh thanks Franco,

What you advised are things I have felt but hadn't been aware of consciously, definitely depends on the girl here.

I also use cofirmations to gauge compliance, confidence/comfort and to add warmth, sometimes even seeing girls mirror me!

Actually now that I think about it, even text time intervals can be established by way of leading example and I think this is one reason I dislike confirmation texts (they usually are sent fairly quickly, imagine an reply like "Ok cool" a day later. While I have experienced girls do things like this, I like to avoid that.)

About gauging compliance, I may see what happens if I do not confirm our plans to hang out. If she shows up that's a little indicator that she's pretty confident/comfortable and compliant.

Thanks again Franco as you led me to think a little more deeply about this!

-J