LR  NYE Salsa Party (Social Circle)

MrRapo

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Feb 1, 2015
Messages
46
Location
Europe
18 jan 2020

Background

On January 3th I attended a NYE salsa party downtown in my city. There were around 500 people in this venue. The dance level overall is pretty intermediate. So most people have 1 or 2 year dance experience here. In this venue there were two rooms. In 1 room they were playing salsa music and in the other Bachata music. Most of the time I was in the Bachata room. I enjoyed this party. So many of my friends and acquittances were there. The ratio was in the favor for men. I had a great time. Also I’m a pretty good dancer, which also increases my social value. At this party there were a lot of 6s and 7s. So many girls were giving my signs. I’m picky cuz everyone knows each other’s. I prefer to be that innocent Asian guy in the salsa dance that knows how to dance. But my ex-lovers, fbs and friends from salsa know I’m not that so innocent. The reason I prefer to stay low is, I prefer to keep it drama free and I like to come back here and treat it like a Zen place for me. Unless the woman is really pretty or we have great chemistry than I will do pickup.

Approach
The girl ( let’s call her NYESalsa1.0) She is cute, I like her, blond, taller than me, nice body. We have some mutual friends and I have seen her before at another salsa party but we haven't spoken to each other yet. I met her in the resting area. Between the two rooms from this venue there is this area where people can sit and relax. NYESalsa1.0 was leaning at the wall near the exit, it looked like she was waiting for someone. I approached her and we started talking. I don't remember my opening, but she told me that she is waiting for a phone call from her little brother and that something serious might have happened to him. Okay whatever.

We started talking. She's from another city. Its 1 hour distance traveling to my city, she’s 21 years old, a fulltime schoolteacher for primary students, likes to dance salsa and has done jazz dance during her teenage years, laidback and carefree personality. Logistic is bad, she is carpooling and has to drive back her friends. It's 15min walk to my place The party is ending soon, It seems better not to go for the pull at that time, So I decided to meet up later and go for the #. I asked her out and we traded numbers. We did one dance together, after the song ended, we separated cuz of the people and the surrounding we kinda lost each other in the crowd.

Some interesting remarks from this conversation:
Cuz the party was ending soon, people were starting to leave, Most of them I know. 80% of the time when someone left they said goodbye to me.

NYESalsa1.0: Wow you know a lot of people
Me: Well it's all right, Its cuz I live in this city and I have been dancing over 4 years in the salsa scene.
NYESalsa1.0: Yeah and you're also really social and you dress really nice.
Me: Haha, Thanks

Another remark, during our conversation, she asked me this question out of the blue. It felt like a test to me and I wanted to answer it smoothly haha.

NYESalsa1.0: Blablabla
Me: haha cool, blablabla
NYESalsa1.0: And what about you, what's your passion?
Me: Hmm my passion. Women are my passion.
NYESalsa1.0: Haha what?
Me: Yeah women are man-makers. It's like they are holding a mirror in front of me. They always try to look for any weaknesses a man may have and start to poke at it to stress test us. Every woman does that in her own unique way, I like that. So I try to meet many kinds of woman, so in return it makes me a better man. So that's why women are my passion.

( Something like that. It sounded better in Dutch XD. I could tell in her eyes that she really liked my answer)

Texting
Mainly texting about date and meet up. I wanted to meet with her in another city, where we both have to travel 30min with the train. She agreed to the plan. A week later she flaked, told me that she’s not feeling well, and wants to reschedule. I told her not to worry about it, that I will text her again. Few days later, I asked her out through texting and I convinced her to come to my city, grab drinks here and that I will also show her around. She agreed with the plan and has to travel 1 hour with the train to meet up with me.

So finally after 15 days we meet up again.

The Date
We met up on 18 jan Saturday noon. In summary it was a relax date. I did not do anything special. Some banter here and some deep dive there.
The whole date lasted around 1.5 hour:
  • 10min walk from the train station to the cafe
  • 45min for having drinks and talking at the cafe.
  • Afterwards I gave her a tour around my city for 30min.
  • Somewhere during the conversation she asked where I live. Told her its close by and only 10min walking from here.
  • Later during the date, I suggested we could grab lunch at my place cuz I'm hungry it's close by. She agreed to it
Pull
At my place, we sat at the couch, I offered her drinks and we're talking. Slowly I started to come closer, while closing the distance, she is looking at my lips. I go for the makeout . This happens in than less ten minutes. I continue escalating. I lifted her up and toss her on my bed. No LMR and we had sex for 2 hours.

Some remarks
  • I found out later that she had to travel 1.5hour with the train to meet me and not 1 hour.
  • She was surprised that I could lift her up so easily. ( Bitch do I look that weak XD, Damm I gotta lift more)
  • During sex, she told me that I have to wear a condom, I respected that so I did. Sometime later she took my condom off to give me a BJ. After the BJ session, I wanted to fuck her, she didn't resist that I went in her raw. Also during the sex she told me not to cum inside her cuz she's not on birthcontrol.
  • During the city tour we were walking the whole time while our arms are locked together.
  • Maybe I could have skipped the city tour, But then again it was hard to read her. She didn't show much IOI, So I decided to play it safe and stick to the date plan and I just focus on SAC and mainly on the compliance part.
  • For me picking up during Salsa parties is hard, It’s hard for me to switch from dance mode to social and to pick up mode, also I’m there to dance and only focus on receptive girls. I have no patience for neutral and uninterested girls (duh). For Salsa party you have to pay cover. I feel like I have to get my money back through first dancing a lot on the first few hours and then I feel satisfied enough to go and approach girls for dates/sex.

I like this girl. I want to keep her as a FB or a causal relationship. I will try to set up future dates with her at my place.
 

Científico

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 20, 2018
Messages
437
Good shit. I like reading field reports from other people in the dancing scene. Getting phone numbers and meeting up later is the typical pattern though, rarely have I pulled directly from salsa events - only a few times in my life, always horny MILF's open to hooking up that evening. Let me know what your experience has been.

I'm trying more these days to go to more congresses in other cities (further away where I know less people) and getting a hotel room - literally the best logistics possible.
 

MrRapo

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Feb 1, 2015
Messages
46
Location
Europe
@Científico,

Thanks for your comment. Yes there are alot of older women at these salsa parties, but I dont find them attractive that much.

If I look back to my experience. Most of the girls I pulled were from dancing classes:

1. Join try-out salsa classes at university campus.
Many young hot single girls 18-21, joining the class out of curiosity. They don't stick long so act fast. Nobody knows eachother that well. You dont even have to be really good dancer to get girls here. I always # here. And this is were I found my last girlfriend.

2. Join try-out salsa classes at salsaschool.
same as above but, the crowd is usually older.

3. Help out with the try-out classes at your danceschool.
Sometimes schools, need better dancers to give demostrations to the public. I always volunteer. Were I can show my dance and increase social proof. During the break I talk with the people there and look for IOI and #close. Or I play the long game with certain girls, cuz some will join the dance school.

4. Help out in the beginner classes.
More of a hit and miss. Back in the days, when I wanted to good really good at salsa. I wanted to dance as many as possible, So I volunteer to help at the newb classes. I've met some cute girls this way and got the # or suggest to grab drinks later after class.

As for parties, its really inconsistent. I'm there mostly to dance.:

5. local dance party from danceschool
I would not go for the girls that come here regularly and if you wanna come back here. due to reputation. I've seen guys get blacklist for bothering girls to much, and also we in a sensitive time. Use the regularly girls to show off your danceskills and increase pre selection by flirting with them. and focus on the beginners and new visitor girls.

6. bigger parties ( 2 or more rooms)
these parties are usually far away, logistic are bad. I go for # or pull in the bathroom or in my car.

7. And lastly
I'm trying more these days to go to more congresses in other cities (further away where I know less people) and getting a hotel room - literally the best logistics possible.

Yes congress are my favorite. especially when it last for the whole weekend. I treat it as a mini holiday. Get hotel close to congress. I've pulled many girls here. Congress are big and people feel more anonymously here. Lots of hot girls there. I always try to go for the same night lay here.

Only drawbacks of congress is that it may cost alot of money and it can be tiring, cuz of the workshop during the day and the party in night. Wat I do is I take a nap before the party.
 

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 24, 2020
Messages
285
Love you report and, like you, I'm very cautious about getting a reputation at local Salsa venues. I keep value high by dancing with lots of good dancers but also keep my availability visible by dancing with intermediates plus any newbies that take my fancy. I also do the "help with beginners classes" when I get the chance.

When they do a Friday night special event I always keep an eye out for single girls that I've not seen around before as they are often out of towners that are down for the weekend. Sometimes they are down for the event or another reason but they are out on their own which means:
1. They have gone out on there own which takes confidence, and is very attractive in itself, and are most likely looking to get into mischief and have a fun memorable evening without any risk of friends or anyone else reporting back to their normal home life,
2. They probably have excellent logistics, and even if they don't I do,
3. They are usually quite keen to go back to their normal life after the weekend with no drama or complications - unless you both fancy a future weekend

I live in the UK and here we've moved away from calling them "congresses" and most are now "Festivals". Don't get any illusions of grandeur such as "Glastonbury", they are all usually fairly small and range from 60 people to 500 but that means they are usually very friendly and plenty of opportunity to meet and chat. Most are held in venues that have fairly inexpensive rooms so the whole weekend can be quite economic as there's no additional complications such as Taxis or cover charges other than the hotel and event pass which are often combined.

Most of our festival weekends have a mix of Salsa and Bachata in one room and a separate room for Kizomba (a very close intimate dance). The mode of operation I try and use is:
-ask her to dance in the salsa room - either Salsa or Bachata doesn't matter
-take her to get a drink
-take her for another Salsa/Bachata dance
-ask her for a Kizomba dance
-ask her to go home/upstairs depending on logistics

All the way through you are asking for compliance and moving her, rarely do you get resistance, so you can isolate her and escalate.

I used to think that you needed to be a good Kizomba dancer but you really don't. Most girls actually expect it to be more like an 80s smooch dance so most will go to the Kizomba room with that expectation and most can't do much Kizomba anyway but as the room is always dark with minimal lighting even those that can't do more than a basic 2 step can deliver on their expectations.

Would love to hear others experience and field reports from similar environment as I also dance Ballroom but this tends to only result in phone numbers - which isn't a bad thing - just a different game.
 

Dragon913

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jan 21, 2018
Messages
68
great post.
i like ur fr organization template.
would u mind me using parts of it for my reports?
 

Científico

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 20, 2018
Messages
437
If I look back to my experience. Most of the girls I pulled were from dancing classes:

Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I'm in my 30's now and don't have ready access to university dance classes in my day to day life. I've been dancing 10 years anyway and will quite honestly be bored at beginner classes.

My best shot at this kind of game, where I get laid by taking advantage of interest from women that see me as having high value in the dancing world, is probably to either 1.) join a performance team or 2.) help teach classes at a dance school. Both of these require time I simply don't have right now. Maybe in the future.

Most of our festival weekends have a mix of Salsa and Bachata in one room and a separate room for Kizomba (a very close intimate dance). The mode of operation I try and use is:
-ask her to dance in the salsa room - either Salsa or Bachata doesn't matter
-take her to get a drink
-take her for another Salsa/Bachata dance
-ask her for a Kizomba dance
-ask her to go home/upstairs depending on logistics

I experimented with a similar system at a congress last year and had some good preliminary results - got my first bounceback to a hotel room this way (the write-up is in my first journal). Moving a girl from dance floor to dance floor is a great way to get compliance before a final bounceback back to your room.

When it's late, past 2 am, or sometimes even 4,5,6 am at some congresses, for the most part I have to skip the drink since the bar has closed hours ago. I think to do this successfully you have to screen for a rock and roll girl just based on the way she is dancing - is she putting her face close to yours.

There will certainly be more experiments this year :)
 

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Jan 24, 2020
Messages
285
When it's late, past 2 am, or sometimes even 4,5,6 am at some congresses,
If it gets to 2 am and I haven't had success I'll be going to bed alone! Too old to be up that late, I can't do staying in bed late the following morning as it messes up my body clock and I hate feeling crappy.

I think to do this successfully you have to screen for a rock and roll girl just based on the way she is dancing
I'd never really thought about it like that. I have learned that it's best to ask girls to dance that are "asking you to ask them" with eye contact and/or a smile. At a congresses/festivals I do screen a girl quite hard both in the first dance and when getting a drink at the bar. As a rough guide I will probably dance with 3-4 girls before getting a drink with one, and then only one of the 2-3 that I get a drink with will move to a second dance. If she doesn't pass screening or doesn't pass compliance tests I move on. Dancing with lots of ladies and chatting to them after, even if it's just a couple of minutes, gives me good social value and also a good vibe. It's not unusual for a girl to come and ask me for another dance later, again I will try and move her quickly. I guess by this point she may have decided either I'm a good option or she's become much more horny and receptive after more dancing and/or drinks.

One piece of dance advice I would give to any man dancing close hold or in close contact with a lady is to "invite her into your space" and not "step into her space". By allowing her to decide how close she stands she feels in control and less "threatened" and therefore likely to present less resistance, if any. I tried this out in a large Kizomba festival class where there were over 100 ladies. If I allowed the lady to step into me and take position 99% of the time she would adopt a close contact hold and be quite relaxed. If I stepped into her space she would try to keep a small distance and would be very tense. Bearing in mind I had never met any of these ladies before it was quite a surprise that they were all very willing and very comfortable being this close to a man they had never danced with before. This applies equally to Kizomba, Bachata Sensual (which I'm not keen on) or ballroom.

- is she putting her face close to yours.
That's a good read on her - I'll remember that as I get a lot of girls do it and I hadn't seen it that way - thanks.
 
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