I'm sure there's some article that deals with trumping male competition, or that sort. I'll assume it hasn't dealt with this:
Sometimes when on a night out, when going about your business, you might get a confident happy guy come up to
you offering a sort of dude handshake (I don't know what it's called), you know, type you'd in a bar. Then they'll just say something like "how's it going dude". The other night this happened and I said "hey stranger" as if to say "if we must".
It's harmless of course, and maybe they're just happy and want to say hello. But let's face it, they don't care who you are. The way I see it, is that they're getting a sense for the other guys in the vicinity, so that if a hot girl happens to come by, they'll know what they're up against. Or perhaps another way of looking upon it, is that they're confirming that you're beta.
Come to think of it, what if he'd done it when I was sort of busy... playing pool, as I had been? sort of occupied, but yet
not so busy to be able to refuse. Because if you refused, you might look like the guy who's killing the mood in the room.
If it were me, I wouldn't offer the hand to someone, if I saw they were potentially concentrating on something else. It sort of undermines the importance of what they're doing, and it's a cheap way to try look cool.
It's as if they've read pua or something. Or maybe I just think of it that way now, having done so myself! Have you guys come across similar, and how do you deal with such?
Thank you
Male competition story - the way I think of it as of now:
I happened end up chatting to one of these sorts lately, in a crowded bar, while we both happened to be leaning against the same table. While talking to him, I did have watch myself... to make sure that I wasn't just answering all his
questions, etc. The more the interaction was all about me, the more likely I'll be the one to get poked fun at, or offered
encouragement... i.e, beta maled.
While chatting, a girl walked by us (coming from my side), and I tried to pull her in. She then left, and as she passed him, he couldn't really do (on her) what I had already tried. Of course he'd something to say about it; and told him "stop being an expert". That shut him up, as we were in a bar after all. But come to think of it, if my confidence had dropped when near him, I mightn't have been able to act fast enough with this girl.
I guess every interaction kind of either up or lowers your state. Thankfully, with most dudes, you can take questions at face value, and need not have your guard up.
Sometimes when on a night out, when going about your business, you might get a confident happy guy come up to
you offering a sort of dude handshake (I don't know what it's called), you know, type you'd in a bar. Then they'll just say something like "how's it going dude". The other night this happened and I said "hey stranger" as if to say "if we must".
It's harmless of course, and maybe they're just happy and want to say hello. But let's face it, they don't care who you are. The way I see it, is that they're getting a sense for the other guys in the vicinity, so that if a hot girl happens to come by, they'll know what they're up against. Or perhaps another way of looking upon it, is that they're confirming that you're beta.
Come to think of it, what if he'd done it when I was sort of busy... playing pool, as I had been? sort of occupied, but yet
not so busy to be able to refuse. Because if you refused, you might look like the guy who's killing the mood in the room.
If it were me, I wouldn't offer the hand to someone, if I saw they were potentially concentrating on something else. It sort of undermines the importance of what they're doing, and it's a cheap way to try look cool.
It's as if they've read pua or something. Or maybe I just think of it that way now, having done so myself! Have you guys come across similar, and how do you deal with such?
Thank you
Male competition story - the way I think of it as of now:
I happened end up chatting to one of these sorts lately, in a crowded bar, while we both happened to be leaning against the same table. While talking to him, I did have watch myself... to make sure that I wasn't just answering all his
questions, etc. The more the interaction was all about me, the more likely I'll be the one to get poked fun at, or offered
encouragement... i.e, beta maled.
While chatting, a girl walked by us (coming from my side), and I tried to pull her in. She then left, and as she passed him, he couldn't really do (on her) what I had already tried. Of course he'd something to say about it; and told him "stop being an expert". That shut him up, as we were in a bar after all. But come to think of it, if my confidence had dropped when near him, I mightn't have been able to act fast enough with this girl.
I guess every interaction kind of either up or lowers your state. Thankfully, with most dudes, you can take questions at face value, and need not have your guard up.
