- Joined
- Dec 20, 2012
- Messages
- 143
I feel like I've pulled myself out of the water recently, an unconscious decision on my part. I feel like I could either go back, do what society tells me to , and continue going to community college, even though I failed all of my classes my first semester, or give up and continue pursuing art without school, and get a day job. This feels like a really pivotal moment in my life, and any decision could end up changing who I am later down the line. I feel like college is holding me back, and that I might do better with a private instructor. I also feel kinda nervous at that conclusion. Like what if I can't find a job? what if I can't find a good private instructor? With school, I can pay the amount that is required, but I kind of feel like maybe school isn't worth the amount I have to pay. I don't have a job yet, and I feel as if I would never get that money back. I feel that I have been just going along the mainstream, and if I tried to deviate now I would fail because of my uncertainty. Is school right for me? I know nobody could answer that question but me. I feel like I could become a professional artist if I had the right instruction. I really want to make a living of my art someday, even though that's impossible at the moment. I feel like there is nothing waiting for me if I quit school, but what really is waiting for me if I do? Student loans? an art education? Degrees don't matter in art, and I feel like all I want is skill, not a piece of paper. I want to get my licence, get a job , and find a good art instructor. At the same time I feel like my mom wouldn't like that, and might kick me out. Whatever I do this semester, I'm sure I won't return to this college next semester because of the bad professors, and I feel like I'm not learning anything. I feel like I can't commit to college. I feel that enrolling in college may have been a mistake , and that I maybe should have thought about these thing back in high school. any advice would be appreciated.
