So today, I went out with the full intention to just be relaxed. Not really trying to be successful, just trying to get comfortable again with rejection and enjoy myself. I've realized at this point that you can't force yourself to feel an emotion and it will fray your nerves and make you miserable trying. It needs to be easier feeling than that. So just tried to be relaxed and unaffected. Didn't always work but, hey, journey of a thousand miles.
Girl 1: "You are adorable" "Thank you, that made my day! I have to go to class though" But I followed her to class anyway. We talk and every time she tries to exit, I pull her back in, but she didn't really appreciate it. Still, I got the number but it's probably not solid.
I struggle with a strange form of AA. I don't feel physiologically nervous but am so relaxed that I don't want to do anything to upset my state. Then I remember my gorgeous teacher and I think to myself: "If I want a woman like that someday, I've got to talk to some women TODAY"
Girl 2: "Hello" Said weakly. I keep walking with her and she realizes that I said it to her. "Oh, hello" She tells me right off that she has a boyfriend and I reply with a phrase that I should really cut out of my arsenal: "That's okay, we can still talk" It implies that I need permission in a way. I think that's why it sucks. Just say: "That's cool."We talk for a minute and I depart knowing that it will go nowhere.
Girl 3: sitting on bench. I feel the AWESOME kick in for half a second when I open, then I get lame again when I try to talk to her. How to be curious without being insinuating? I do get the number but she was not very enthusiastic. Another unsolid one. Oh well.
Girl 4: Walking towards me. I open. She is walking faster than me and speeds up a little. Clear sign that she wants to leave. I bid her good day and leave.
Girl 5: sitting down. I approach not knowing what to say at all but then somehow slowly chant "I think that you are beautiful" A bit of an overstatement but I think it works. While talking with her, I try to emulate a role model in this case, George Clooney. But trying to imagine what he'll say and how he'll say it, and trying to make myself follow suit all while talking to this girl confuses the hell out of me, so I remember that I should be relaxing and not stressing, so I cut that out. Save that for later when I'm more outcome independent. I try to get her to walk with me. "But I have to go to class" "When?" "In six minutes" "Well, then, let's walk to your class" "You want to come with me to class?" Some more unsmooth banter on my part. Then, "Let's go!" I say. I get up and don't look back. I wonder if she's really following me, give up the prospect, and keep walking to meet someone else, but then I hear behind me "My class is right here!" I turn back and she's walking towards the building that she was sitting next to. Doy. I catch up and we talk some more. I try to make something happen. Boyfriend mention. I said something that was sexy frame but I can't for the life of me remember what it was.
Girl 6: Walking towards me. She is a little shy and evidently awkward from a guy just coming up to her but we talk for a little bit. She departs with a "It was nice to meet you" and I let her go.
Girl 7: great hair. Full bod. Open with comment about hair. We talk. I get number clunkily as the conversation dies. Probably not a good one.
Summary: Was relaxed, but not smooth, commanding, or sexy. Put into other terms, I was "just being myself". Man, why does any guy want to just be himself? But now I run into another issue. How to layer those next three characteristics on top of relaxation? Must use mental conditioning.
Girl 1: "You are adorable" "Thank you, that made my day! I have to go to class though" But I followed her to class anyway. We talk and every time she tries to exit, I pull her back in, but she didn't really appreciate it. Still, I got the number but it's probably not solid.
I struggle with a strange form of AA. I don't feel physiologically nervous but am so relaxed that I don't want to do anything to upset my state. Then I remember my gorgeous teacher and I think to myself: "If I want a woman like that someday, I've got to talk to some women TODAY"
Girl 2: "Hello" Said weakly. I keep walking with her and she realizes that I said it to her. "Oh, hello" She tells me right off that she has a boyfriend and I reply with a phrase that I should really cut out of my arsenal: "That's okay, we can still talk" It implies that I need permission in a way. I think that's why it sucks. Just say: "That's cool."We talk for a minute and I depart knowing that it will go nowhere.
Girl 3: sitting on bench. I feel the AWESOME kick in for half a second when I open, then I get lame again when I try to talk to her. How to be curious without being insinuating? I do get the number but she was not very enthusiastic. Another unsolid one. Oh well.
Girl 4: Walking towards me. I open. She is walking faster than me and speeds up a little. Clear sign that she wants to leave. I bid her good day and leave.
Girl 5: sitting down. I approach not knowing what to say at all but then somehow slowly chant "I think that you are beautiful" A bit of an overstatement but I think it works. While talking with her, I try to emulate a role model in this case, George Clooney. But trying to imagine what he'll say and how he'll say it, and trying to make myself follow suit all while talking to this girl confuses the hell out of me, so I remember that I should be relaxing and not stressing, so I cut that out. Save that for later when I'm more outcome independent. I try to get her to walk with me. "But I have to go to class" "When?" "In six minutes" "Well, then, let's walk to your class" "You want to come with me to class?" Some more unsmooth banter on my part. Then, "Let's go!" I say. I get up and don't look back. I wonder if she's really following me, give up the prospect, and keep walking to meet someone else, but then I hear behind me "My class is right here!" I turn back and she's walking towards the building that she was sitting next to. Doy. I catch up and we talk some more. I try to make something happen. Boyfriend mention. I said something that was sexy frame but I can't for the life of me remember what it was.
Girl 6: Walking towards me. She is a little shy and evidently awkward from a guy just coming up to her but we talk for a little bit. She departs with a "It was nice to meet you" and I let her go.
Girl 7: great hair. Full bod. Open with comment about hair. We talk. I get number clunkily as the conversation dies. Probably not a good one.
Summary: Was relaxed, but not smooth, commanding, or sexy. Put into other terms, I was "just being myself". Man, why does any guy want to just be himself? But now I run into another issue. How to layer those next three characteristics on top of relaxation? Must use mental conditioning.
