LR Persisting and Winning and a new girlfriend

[Rookie]

The process of laying this girl was long and difficult. She isn't a party girl and the best way to describe her is that she is a shy excited girl (from girlschase articles: shy excited girl). It took a few dates and is the same girl from this report here. viewtopic.php?f=5&t=13200

Second Date
After our first date mentioned above in that field report we had a second date. I went round hers and she cooked me dinner. We then began to escalate and she stopped me saying that she didn't want to have sex immediately. In other words she had boyfriend zoned me fast and didn't want to ruin things by rushing. She seemed adamant about her position on this topic. I knew there was no changing her mind her and i didn't have the skill to outframe her. So instead of escalating and failing and then being seen lesser in her mind i decided to agree and say that i also didn't want to rush things. I don't know if this was the right course of action. We ended up sleeping together topless and touching each other.

Third Date
I knew that i had to break her resistance over time and try to create barriers for her to break. I invited her over mine for dinner that i'd cook instead this time. She accepted and came over. We ate and watched a film and then i started escalating again. However instead of pressing for sex i thought i'd drive her crazy with teasing her and saying that sex would be so good but we can't do that yet.

Date 4
Pretty much the same thing again. But this time i come over to hers for some work etc. I'm getting worried now because we are spending a lot of time but haven't been sexual. Could i be losing her. This time I try sexual framing. Telling her about sex and how great it is and asking her if she wanted to have sex with me. At this point she said that she did but again was afraid of losing me and told me to wait a month. ONE MONTH! I agreed with her to put her mind to ease but i couldn't wait a month. Again we ended up doing everything but.

Fifth date
Now this time she came to mine. There wasn't much game involved, we chatted about life and things and deep dived. I still added intrigue and flirting and we watched another film after food. Thing were getting repetitive and I was getting worried. However I kept at the sexual framing, escalation and teasing and barriers. I was touching her a lot and got her very horny and in the moment i told her that i was going to fuck her. There was no resistance.

And so after 5 dates i'd finally shagged her, just days after her one month rule. I guess persistence does pay off.

Any questions or thoughts please leave a reply.
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[Marcellus]

Rookie

Second Date
After our first date mentioned above in that field report we had a second date. I went round hers and she cooked me dinner. We then began to escalate and she stopped me saying that she didn't want to have sex immediately. In other words she had boyfriend zoned me fast and didn't want to ruin things by rushing. She seemed adamant about her position on this topic. I knew there was no changing her mind her and i didn't have the skill to outframe her. So instead of escalating and failing and then being seen lesser in her mind i decided to agree and say that i also didn't want to rush things. I don't know if this was the right course of action. We ended up sleeping together topless and touching each other.

Could have been a good learning experience working on your frame control and trying to slay her after that 2nd date( Don't you reckon?)
Anyways, It may have taken 5 dates but the end result is still the same. Good Job

 

[Brendan]

Hey man! Glad you finally landed her -- I'd have been worried too.
Read your first date report. The last-minute-period has been LMR every time girls have said it. Well, sometimes it has been true! Just that the logical reasoning is a facade for the emotion "I must resist him ...because I'm wanting him so much I'm losing control". I recall it happening with a girl who straight up said "we're not having sex tonight". I didn't out-frame it -- I just ignored it, tossing a vague justification for continuing to do what we were doing, like "let's just kiss some more" or "you can always say 'no' later". You just have to collaborate with her instincts against the scared logic that's keeping her from having a big smile and feeling alive!

I'd say this 5-date epic fits what GC says -- not getting her laid the first time the two of you have the opportunity makes it far more difficult for her to see you as "Lover". Not that she didn't want you! Just you ended up in the "Boyfriend" lane (as you already knew). There is nothing wrong with that, as long as that's what makes you happy too. But it's more work with lower odds of ending up together at all. You beat those odds, but... took strength and persistence to lay her, and you're no longer free to play the field. Win-win? Sometimes.

I've had plenty of girls get adamant on me lately, i.e. you know it's not her logical mind saying one thing while her emotions want the opposite -- she, for once, means what she says (I'm still learning how to discern the two). You took the only road she left you, and sounds like your ability to construct a sexy vibe was up to the task. Kudos!

My take, your master stroke was when you went dominant, just straight up told her how it was going to be, and did it when she was in the right state! Admittedly, you'd gotten her very hot on previous dates. You'd kept at it, and she knew it was not you but her putting up the resistance -- which is instinctively her job -- so the story in her mind is that you'd put up with a significant amount of obstacles, kept your cool, and had just cause to be tired of toeing the line. Enter the conquering hero that she can melt for!

It sounds like you're

 

[Rookie]

Cheers Marcellus,

Yeah I agree on trying to get frame control down in general but it's a skill that i find hard to get better at. And on this case she had a very strong internal frames so it was a hard feat to accomplish.

But thanks anyway for the feedback

Rookie

 

[Rookie]

Hey Brendan,

Yeah man that period LMR had me stumped. But after she became my girlfriend i did ask her because, hey, why not and she told me that she was on it.
And i know the feeling of girls flat out telling you "we are not having sex," it's such a crazy feeling when you end up having sex that same night haha.

As for the lover vs boyfriend value you are completely right. she did see me as boyfriend and it does lower you odds but like you said i beat those odds. And yeah i think i've got my sexy vibe down pat which makes things hella easier.

Yeah i agree about my master stroke, See i figured i'd try to set up a barrier and create some challenges. Things like saying you want to do something but then saying you can't due to some external reason that she has control of (such as friends or venue or in this case her one month rule.) I worked that well with bringing her to a really horny state but then just letting her hang building a lot of sexual tension.

Cheers for your reply by the way, it was really great to read

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