Philosophically (not biologically), why have children?

[The Byronic Man]

Can someone explain why most people want children?

Also, do you think having children is a good thing for YOU (not society or the human species), and if so, why? I have no desire to have children and see them as a resource/time hog. I want to spend all my time for myself and the people that matter to me.

Not bashing...just genuinely want to understand this desire to have children.

Female posters, I'd love to hear your perspective too since it seems women tend to have this desire the strongest.

 

[mkivtt]

How old are you?

I'm guessing you are under 30. I used to not really care about kids, but as I get older (almost 38 now), I'm starting to change my mind. When you age and have friends and family die, you realize your time here is limited and one day that person dying will be you. What will you leave behind? And do you want to die alone (a possible scenario if you have no kids)?

Plus, if you raise kids, you can raise them as you see fit. Hopefully, that means as intelligent, humble, honest, compassionate people. Most of the degenerate morons out there shouldn't be breathing, let alone breeding, and if the human race isn't going to fall flat on its face in a downward spiral of devolution, dysgenics and degeneration (I blame entitlement culture, political correctness and handouts, but that's a different rant altogether), some of the smarter people need to reproduce too. Lol. There are far too many mouth breathers with an IQ of an average day's temperature pumping out kids.

It may also have to do with settling down. When you finally find the One, do you want to spend your time with just the two of you or eventually add someone to raise together? Wouldn't you feel that eventually it would be better to solidify that bond even further with kids?

 

[The Byronic Man]

I'm actually in my early 30s. I do have Asperger's Syndrome (I'm not totally weird like Sheldon in "The Big Bang Theory" though), so maybe that's why I don't understand this desire. As an aside, my psychologist asked me if I understood why people get married (presumably a diagnostic question) and I told her I didn't understand why when you can get all the same benefits as BF/GF. I thought it was an odd question because I know other "normal" people who don't see the reason to get married as well (albeit rare).

Anyway, the way I see it is that if people have children to either live vicariously through them...and/or so that you'll have someone to take care of you when you get old...and/or to keep you company, it seems children are in the parents' best interest rather than for the children's best interest. That doesn't seem like a good reason to have children because your intent would be to use them.

Solidifying a bond with your significant other is a good thing, but I don't see how having kids would do that. I would rather allocate the time/resources I would have spent on kids on my significant other.

 

[Desert Eagle]

Solidifying a bond with your significant other is a good thing, but I don't see how having kids would do that. I would rather allocate the time/resources I would have spent on kids on my significant other.

Kids are people too, mate. It's not like they are always these little devils running around; if you had one right now, they'd become an adult 30 years later.

And, since you mention it, kids can be quite the opposite of "resource hogs". We often tie this designation to people; the more of us, the worse off we are! When, in actuality, people can pro-create resources. They can work for a living, create sustainable sources of energy, and not get tied a fury of consuming at a dangerous rate.

If you'd rather spend time and resources on your lady friend to make her happy, you may be looking at the whole thing in a wrong way. Maybe she doesn't need a bunch of resources to be happy. Women want children, it's part of their DNA. If a species didn't have an urge to create more of its own, then the species would die out.

Also, do you think having children is a good thing for YOU (not society or the human species), and if so, why?

I know it's a part of AS to have difficulty recognizing emotion (my brother has it), so this is going to be tough to explain. Love, for all intents and purposes, is the great equalizer. Having children isn't all about sucking up as much from them to benefit yourself. They are people, not some weird alien species that has nothing to do with you.

There comes a point in time where people need to stop worrying so much about themselves, and focus on spreading well-being to other people is needed. Imagine; you get up to the point where you are amazing with women, and have not a problem in your life. What next? Continue amassing useless items, or help to sustain the future for others? This world doesn't operate around trying to get to the maximum level of happiness. It isn't a scale. Happiness is a state; it is very difficult to exponentially increase that state. It gradually increases, as worries and necessities are taken care of, such as getting a sustainable job, being amazing with women and people, etc; but it won't increase if you just get more and more resources. Children enter as a way to spread that love and happiness. To create another human being which is loved, happy, and therefore can also translate joy into your own life.