Phone no. Question

[Flames]

I recently asked a girl I'd known a while for her phone number. It wasn't an out of the blue request, there was actually a reason for needing it as I was helping her with something, but she flipped a bit (she got a bit edgey and nervous) and while she didn't say no she asked me what my schedule was and said ok I'll see you then.

Now wether I see her or not is neither here nor there but should I just accept it as a rejection? I'm not going to flat out ignore her. I'm in two minds about it. Either she needs space to think about it, or is she's just putting me off to save face?

Has anyone ever had any experience of this? I'm used to either a yes or no both of which would've been fine.

 

[trashKENNUT]

Flames,

I recently asked a girl I'd known a while for her phone number. It wasn't an out of the blue request, there was actually a reason for needing it as I was helping her with something, but she flipped a bit (she got a bit edgey and nervous) and while she didn't say no she asked me what my schedule was and said ok I'll see you then.

Red flag.

Been there. This kind of girls, Too problematic. I talk to Chase before. Not saying that Chase implement this are crazy girls but i got my answer from Chase about a similar kind of problem, I can assure you they are time wasters.

Zac

 

[Flames]

Thanks Zac

I did see her but I already assumed that she was a time waster and although she engaged me. I didn't give her much attention and politely excused myself.

I'll see how it goes from here.

 

[Chase]

Flames-

These are strange, yeah. Another reason I don't like social circle!

Anyway, the few times I've encountered this before, the girl's usually had a guy she's been seeing and had me in her head as a "potential, maybe" if at some point it didn't work out with her current guy. Not serious enough with the guy that he's a boyfriend, but not so casual that she's comfortable bringing you into her life. Then when you ask for her phone number, she gets really weird about it... the thought process seems to be "Guy I like asked for my phone number - wait, have other guy I'm currently dating - but, other guy isn't a boyfriend, so can't tell him I have a boyfriend and let's be friends - what to say - too awkward - does not compute!" and then she blows up.

The other possibility is she's just been catching "he's interested in me" vibes from you for a long time, but you've never taken any real action to move things forward with her before, and now you want her number. Even if you have a reason for it, if you aren't TOTALLY smooth, confident, and natural about it - if you're even 1% off - it gets super weird. Even if she likes you. Because then it's wait, why is he asking for it NOW and not a year ago when we were flirting? Has he been waiting for the right moment to ask me for like a year? Creepy...

Even in the office, you've got to be wary about not missing escalation windows for things like phone numbers with women you have sexual chemistry of one sort or another with if you want to take them. If you nuke the flirting it's fine, but if you keep it up and then take a long time to ask for a number and you're even 1% uncomfortable when you do it, it gets weirder than a wheel of cheese that's been left in the fridge far too long. People just get too comfortable having you in a certain role, and when you break their expectations here it's unnerving.

Chase

 

[Flames]

Thanks for your input Chase,

It wasn't my finest hour really. I was kind of stuck in a situation of having offered to help and then not follow through or help but do it in a way that wasn't particularly natural and flowing, and a bit rushed.

Oh well