- Joined
- Oct 13, 2014
- Messages
- 31
(ok, quick question - I realized I'm not sure how to format my posts properly. Is there a guide somewhere...?)
Despite not yet having been laid in college, I've developed the reputation of being a player within a few of my social circles. wtf?
I realized this when I lost a date to a girl who agreed we should meet, then pulled a fade - the vibe I got makes me think she's just not all that attracted to me (totally fine, she's one in a thousand), but what she said (and also; told one of my flatmates) was that I seem like too much of a casanova.
I was a little thrown just because that was kind of unexpected, but laughed that one off. But then - I was drunkenly chattering like a songbird with a friend of a friend, who told me she could in no way believe I was going through a dry spell - that I seemed like way too much of a ladies man and too comfortable with being sexual. At this point, I realized this wasn't a fluke, so I asked a flat-mate about it, and it turns out this is what may be going on;
1. I've been practicing being a flirt. What I thought was obvious and clumsy practice which would be dismissed - has been having more of an effect than I thought. Either I have more finesse than I believed or that 'How to Flirt' article is more potent than I gave it credit for.
2. Early on, I was playing around with reputation management and trying to be the comfortable-with-sexuality guy - casually throwing around sex stories, a lot of playful sexual questions, teasing and flirting with the girls a lot. As it became clear I needed to focus on my process and fundamentals a LOT more before I'd start getting any concrete results, I stopped focusing on this. But, it seems like I made a impression early on, and that impression is sticking.
3. Also early on - completely by luck (I don't know how I pulled these off), I managed to get a slew of phone numbers from girls in my activities classes, actual classes, and friends' social circles. I also pulled off several club-makeouts including a few in one night. These went nowhere, but at least one of them was very much in full view of some friends - again, seems to have 'helped'.
4. As an aside; one of my flatmates has explicitly told at least one of her friends that I'm a real ladies man.
So I'm now the foreign sigma male who takes a lot of time to himself, does his own thing, is kind of moody, but also has the (untrue) reputation of a player, at least within a limited social circle and around my peers. Sooo.. what does this mean? Can I tap into this for results, or at least, for extra practice? (I'm still very much a beginner - I need to do that damn newbie assignment when exam season is done)
And another question - Anatman and others have field reports in which their player reputations are clearly working against them. Can someone explain how this works, when being sexual with women is a 'good' thing?
Despite not yet having been laid in college, I've developed the reputation of being a player within a few of my social circles. wtf?
I realized this when I lost a date to a girl who agreed we should meet, then pulled a fade - the vibe I got makes me think she's just not all that attracted to me (totally fine, she's one in a thousand), but what she said (and also; told one of my flatmates) was that I seem like too much of a casanova.
I was a little thrown just because that was kind of unexpected, but laughed that one off. But then - I was drunkenly chattering like a songbird with a friend of a friend, who told me she could in no way believe I was going through a dry spell - that I seemed like way too much of a ladies man and too comfortable with being sexual. At this point, I realized this wasn't a fluke, so I asked a flat-mate about it, and it turns out this is what may be going on;
1. I've been practicing being a flirt. What I thought was obvious and clumsy practice which would be dismissed - has been having more of an effect than I thought. Either I have more finesse than I believed or that 'How to Flirt' article is more potent than I gave it credit for.
2. Early on, I was playing around with reputation management and trying to be the comfortable-with-sexuality guy - casually throwing around sex stories, a lot of playful sexual questions, teasing and flirting with the girls a lot. As it became clear I needed to focus on my process and fundamentals a LOT more before I'd start getting any concrete results, I stopped focusing on this. But, it seems like I made a impression early on, and that impression is sticking.
3. Also early on - completely by luck (I don't know how I pulled these off), I managed to get a slew of phone numbers from girls in my activities classes, actual classes, and friends' social circles. I also pulled off several club-makeouts including a few in one night. These went nowhere, but at least one of them was very much in full view of some friends - again, seems to have 'helped'.
4. As an aside; one of my flatmates has explicitly told at least one of her friends that I'm a real ladies man.
So I'm now the foreign sigma male who takes a lot of time to himself, does his own thing, is kind of moody, but also has the (untrue) reputation of a player, at least within a limited social circle and around my peers. Sooo.. what does this mean? Can I tap into this for results, or at least, for extra practice? (I'm still very much a beginner - I need to do that damn newbie assignment when exam season is done)
And another question - Anatman and others have field reports in which their player reputations are clearly working against them. Can someone explain how this works, when being sexual with women is a 'good' thing?
