I am going to be entering a completely new social situation (college) in about a month? Most of the articles on the site talk about the importance of providing value for pretty much every social situation, what are some ways to up your value drastically?
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- Apr 7, 2013
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Yo,
Make sure to be warm in social interactions. Smile warmly, be inviting and let people know they're welcome around you. Chase has an article up on that kinda thing.
When you're talking or deep diving, try to subtly find out what they like to do or what they're interested in, and see if you can't drop little tidbits of information about it that'll be valuable to them.
Jake.
Make sure to be warm in social interactions. Smile warmly, be inviting and let people know they're welcome around you. Chase has an article up on that kinda thing.
When you're talking or deep diving, try to subtly find out what they like to do or what they're interested in, and see if you can't drop little tidbits of information about it that'll be valuable to them.
Jake.
Smiling? Warmth? hahah thats it? MUST BE KIDDING ME
Geez... Lemme give you a real primer on providing value in University.
THROW PARTIES
ORGANIZE COOL EVENTS
BRING PEOPLE TOGETHER
INTRODUCE YOURSELF TO EVERYONE, GIRLS, GUYS, NERDS ALIKE. Builds social proof. Make friends, meet cuties.
PROVIDE VALUE: Bring girls to a party, bring a 6 pack and play games. I.e. Go around a party telling girls I'll give you a beer for a kiss on the cheek.
KEEP IT FUN
Geez... Lemme give you a real primer on providing value in University.
THROW PARTIES
ORGANIZE COOL EVENTS
BRING PEOPLE TOGETHER
INTRODUCE YOURSELF TO EVERYONE, GIRLS, GUYS, NERDS ALIKE. Builds social proof. Make friends, meet cuties.
PROVIDE VALUE: Bring girls to a party, bring a 6 pack and play games. I.e. Go around a party telling girls I'll give you a beer for a kiss on the cheek.
KEEP IT FUN
And forgoodness sake. Don't be that weird guy cold approaching all the girls at school and focused on getting laid..
You will build a negative reputation. Your efforts will be gone to waste, and YOU WONT HAVE ANY FUN; because in the 4 years of UNI? Your focusing on attempts at getting V but instead have a blast. Make memories..
BELIEVE ME, If you posses leadership and bring an amazing, dominant reality? Women will flock.
I would know.
You will build a negative reputation. Your efforts will be gone to waste, and YOU WONT HAVE ANY FUN; because in the 4 years of UNI? Your focusing on attempts at getting V but instead have a blast. Make memories..
BELIEVE ME, If you posses leadership and bring an amazing, dominant reality? Women will flock.
I would know.
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- Nov 11, 2013
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Things I've noticed about value is that a lot of it gets portrayed before two people have even said a word to each other. Most of what you'll want to be doing is non-verbal... Good posture, strong eye-contact, RELAXED MUSCLES (this one fucked me over too many times). Most of this will make you largely attractive, of course there is a lot more to it and more to work on. It might feel weird to be in a new skin when trying to up your non-verbals but after a month on 1 or 2 things you'll be pretty darn attractive... And the best part, next to no one will no you at college. Give it a try.
After that the next thing is to enjoy the conversations. Start by making friends at college (I didn't and I've got a lot of work to do to catch up, I'm 3rd year at uni in UK). Talk to people and do lots of social gatherings and you'll find people whom you will want to be friends with. Then start cold approaching, if you haven't already. It's cool to hit on a few girls in class, just not all of them especially if you're inexperienced.
The last thing I can think of is to find a niche. This'll be your thing that you'll be known for. Mine's composing music, thinking up potential business ideas and, of course, Seduction (I don't hoot about the last one to everyone). Start with one and work your way up to a few more.
Lastly, if you're introverted still go to some parties, don't say no too often cause soon you won't have the opportunity to at all. I did this and ended up with nearly 0 friends for 2 years.
You'll be good, focus on your fundamentals first. Then when you get to college talk to lots of people... A bit scary but that's why we're here
After that the next thing is to enjoy the conversations. Start by making friends at college (I didn't and I've got a lot of work to do to catch up, I'm 3rd year at uni in UK). Talk to people and do lots of social gatherings and you'll find people whom you will want to be friends with. Then start cold approaching, if you haven't already. It's cool to hit on a few girls in class, just not all of them especially if you're inexperienced.
The last thing I can think of is to find a niche. This'll be your thing that you'll be known for. Mine's composing music, thinking up potential business ideas and, of course, Seduction (I don't hoot about the last one to everyone). Start with one and work your way up to a few more.
Lastly, if you're introverted still go to some parties, don't say no too often cause soon you won't have the opportunity to at all. I did this and ended up with nearly 0 friends for 2 years.
You'll be good, focus on your fundamentals first. Then when you get to college talk to lots of people... A bit scary but that's why we're here
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- Nov 11, 2013
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- 169
Pretty crazy especially at the top party uni's (I'm at one). Something is happening all the time, even when all the students have gone, like they have now. Most nights people head to bars and clubs as drinking age is 18, but enough house parties here anyway. No frats, but there are societies (like paintball, skydiving, theatre society) which do nights out as well. Other than that I'd assume it's the same as in the states, people getting drunk most nights and wanting to get laid.
3 year courses for undergrads (unless you'd like to study in Scotland then it's an extra year). 1 Month for Christmas, Easter, about 3 for Summer. No Spring Break (Half term as it's called here). That's about it on the big things, I'm sure Wiki could give a bit more info. So lot's of 18-21 year olds in the student cities during term time and then its dead quiet most nights, however here it's still pretty busy.
3 year courses for undergrads (unless you'd like to study in Scotland then it's an extra year). 1 Month for Christmas, Easter, about 3 for Summer. No Spring Break (Half term as it's called here). That's about it on the big things, I'm sure Wiki could give a bit more info. So lot's of 18-21 year olds in the student cities during term time and then its dead quiet most nights, however here it's still pretty busy.
Yeah, I've got a month till it starts, am focusing primarily on fundamentals until then. I'll try, my personality tends to be more smooth/brooding and low energy, but I'll figure it out. I'm hoping to go pretty hardcore with girlschase, but more on the mastering social life end of the spectrum first.Edd--19 said:You'll be good, focus on your fundamentals first. Then when you get to college talk to lots of people... A bit scary but that's why we're here
Yeah I'm planning on sticking to social circle, albeit an ever expanding social circleThrowDown said:And forgoodness sake. Don't be that weird guy cold approaching all the girls at school and focused on getting laid..
You will build a negative reputation. Your efforts will be gone to waste, and YOU WONT HAVE ANY FUN; because in the 4 years of UNI? Your focusing on attempts at getting V but instead have a blast. Make memories..
BELIEVE ME, If you posses leadership and bring an amazing, dominant reality? Women will flock.
I would know.
It's a fairly small school and I'm planning on being pretty involved.Thanks for all the help!
It has been about 20 years since I was in college and that was in the States. However some things are universal.
If you can find a role in school that makes you an expert in something such as working the information desk at the Student Union (my role in college), or serving as a representative to a student council, or helping with college tours, or alumni relations, you will come in contact with a number of people from a wide array of backgrounds. You recognize people on a first name basis for a few weeks and that turns into them introducing friends.
On our college campus there was a heavily traveled stretch called HELLO walk. The walk was named after the president of the university in the 1920s. He insisted on saying "hello" to all those he passed on his walk from his house to his office in the Administration Building. He requested that this act of kindness be required of all students and faculty on campus, which is how the walk acquired its name.
The Newspaper editor, the student council president, the dean of the college, greet them with a "Hello, how are you today?" when walking around campus. Pretty soon they are saying "Hello Rocky" before you can say anything. One of my most memorable encounters was an attractive blonde I simply said "Hello" to for a whole semester, twice a week. Then at a Super Bowl Party in January, without a word she greeted me with an aggressive French Kiss. Looking back I could have accelerated things much earlier but it still is a nice story.
If you can find a role in school that makes you an expert in something such as working the information desk at the Student Union (my role in college), or serving as a representative to a student council, or helping with college tours, or alumni relations, you will come in contact with a number of people from a wide array of backgrounds. You recognize people on a first name basis for a few weeks and that turns into them introducing friends.
On our college campus there was a heavily traveled stretch called HELLO walk. The walk was named after the president of the university in the 1920s. He insisted on saying "hello" to all those he passed on his walk from his house to his office in the Administration Building. He requested that this act of kindness be required of all students and faculty on campus, which is how the walk acquired its name.
The Newspaper editor, the student council president, the dean of the college, greet them with a "Hello, how are you today?" when walking around campus. Pretty soon they are saying "Hello Rocky" before you can say anything. One of my most memorable encounters was an attractive blonde I simply said "Hello" to for a whole semester, twice a week. Then at a Super Bowl Party in January, without a word she greeted me with an aggressive French Kiss. Looking back I could have accelerated things much earlier but it still is a nice story.
Ok so follow-up question
Providing value=warm, find place of authority (have applied for admissions job, also joining clubs and a varsity team), make friends everywhere and connect everyone, and relax and have strong fundamentals.
So how do I do all this and convey lover bad boy as well? I have had nothing but relationships in my life and now I want none, so no provider, only lover for hookups and FWB. If first impressions are huge how should I construct and convey that?
Or is that too much to take on and I should focus on making friends and connections first without worrying about being seen as a lover? Are fundamentals (mine are pretty good) enough?
Start school in a few days-hoping to have some field reports up soon regardless of how first impression goes, but you don't get many chances to start over and I want to do this right
Byron
Providing value=warm, find place of authority (have applied for admissions job, also joining clubs and a varsity team), make friends everywhere and connect everyone, and relax and have strong fundamentals.
So how do I do all this and convey lover bad boy as well? I have had nothing but relationships in my life and now I want none, so no provider, only lover for hookups and FWB. If first impressions are huge how should I construct and convey that?
Or is that too much to take on and I should focus on making friends and connections first without worrying about being seen as a lover? Are fundamentals (mine are pretty good) enough?
Start school in a few days-hoping to have some field reports up soon regardless of how first impression goes, but you don't get many chances to start over and I want to do this right
Byron
- Joined
- Nov 11, 2013
- Messages
- 169
Hey YB,
I've been considering this myself and the distinction is pretty early on into an interaction. I'm at a sticking point with it and this was the help I got about it and I reckon it will help you to. Polarise. If we do this, in theory, it should seperate us from those who do want relationships. After you've slept with them you then dictate the relationship conditions until it's monogomous. Then the ball is back in her court. I know Chase wrote about it but I'm too tired to find the article.
Edd
I've been considering this myself and the distinction is pretty early on into an interaction. I'm at a sticking point with it and this was the help I got about it and I reckon it will help you to. Polarise. If we do this, in theory, it should seperate us from those who do want relationships. After you've slept with them you then dictate the relationship conditions until it's monogomous. Then the ball is back in her court. I know Chase wrote about it but I'm too tired to find the article.
Edd