Hey guys,
I'm concerned with the link between Value and Attainability. I'll start this topic with an example.
Imagine two different men: the first one is hopeless with women, he is nervous around them, has almost no fundamentals, and is considered to be in a league below average women. You can give him 5-6 maximum on a 1-10 scale. Therefore, his value is low and attainabillity is high (he will hold on on any girl that finds him attractive). Think of some nerdy guy from high-school or college.
The second man is cool with women. He obeys the Law of Least effort, has solid fundamentals and a reputation of ladies' man. Women in his social circle (and the rest as well) perceive him as a high-value male, even out of their league. Therefore, his attainabillity is below average (at least perceived so). You can think of some celebrity or a high-school \ college star.
So, imagine those two men hit on an average girl, maybe 6-7 on the scale. The first guy - she will most likely throw him under the bus, or maybe start dating him (lack of options). Then, the second guy. This is where it gets interesting. Depending on her self-esteem, she's either going to auto-reject (despite his effort to up his attainabillity by complimenting, being warm etc), or accept his advances and give nearly to zero resistance, leading to intimacy fast, fall hard in love with him and hold on to him.
Here, I'm concerned about the first reaction. I've got rock solid fundamentals, so most girls perceive me as really high-value and cool. Plus, there are really only a few guys in my circle with good fundamentals, so I get scarce too. There are lots of attractive girls in my social circle, but most of them have low-to-medium self-esteem. And when I'm hitting on some them, like asking them on dates, in the result they just flake or auto-reject. Some of them don't even bother to somehow show their interest (he's just too good, I don't stand a chance) They think I'm just too good for them to be serious about it, like it's a joke or something. (I came to this conclusion after a pretty big number of girls with whom I hooked up with and girlfriends ask me why'd I choose them and not the other girls instead) You can think of this as Brad Pitt tries to hit on an average 7 girl in a club or a during the day, girls just won't take it serious.
I guess your advice will be something of "go do cold approach, screw social circle", but I'd like to hear your thoughs about this particular situation, and what can you do about this. Be super warm, up your attainabillity sky-high, or spend more time communicating? Any thoughts would be appreciated.
I'm concerned with the link between Value and Attainability. I'll start this topic with an example.
Imagine two different men: the first one is hopeless with women, he is nervous around them, has almost no fundamentals, and is considered to be in a league below average women. You can give him 5-6 maximum on a 1-10 scale. Therefore, his value is low and attainabillity is high (he will hold on on any girl that finds him attractive). Think of some nerdy guy from high-school or college.
The second man is cool with women. He obeys the Law of Least effort, has solid fundamentals and a reputation of ladies' man. Women in his social circle (and the rest as well) perceive him as a high-value male, even out of their league. Therefore, his attainabillity is below average (at least perceived so). You can think of some celebrity or a high-school \ college star.
So, imagine those two men hit on an average girl, maybe 6-7 on the scale. The first guy - she will most likely throw him under the bus, or maybe start dating him (lack of options). Then, the second guy. This is where it gets interesting. Depending on her self-esteem, she's either going to auto-reject (despite his effort to up his attainabillity by complimenting, being warm etc), or accept his advances and give nearly to zero resistance, leading to intimacy fast, fall hard in love with him and hold on to him.
Here, I'm concerned about the first reaction. I've got rock solid fundamentals, so most girls perceive me as really high-value and cool. Plus, there are really only a few guys in my circle with good fundamentals, so I get scarce too. There are lots of attractive girls in my social circle, but most of them have low-to-medium self-esteem. And when I'm hitting on some them, like asking them on dates, in the result they just flake or auto-reject. Some of them don't even bother to somehow show their interest (he's just too good, I don't stand a chance) They think I'm just too good for them to be serious about it, like it's a joke or something. (I came to this conclusion after a pretty big number of girls with whom I hooked up with and girlfriends ask me why'd I choose them and not the other girls instead) You can think of this as Brad Pitt tries to hit on an average 7 girl in a club or a during the day, girls just won't take it serious.
I guess your advice will be something of "go do cold approach, screw social circle", but I'd like to hear your thoughs about this particular situation, and what can you do about this. Be super warm, up your attainabillity sky-high, or spend more time communicating? Any thoughts would be appreciated.
