Hey all first off I want to say I've been perusing the PUA community as a whole on the internet and have been really liking what I've read. I'm not quite sure where to start so I'll just tell my story:
I recently graduated from university and have moved to Shanghai to work. I'm 22 years old, and decently attractive I suppose. Naturally, when I came here it wasn't too hard to pick up girls. However, all of the girls in clubs and out on the street are at least 25 years old; the younger ones are in class in university. Since I'm working, it's hard to meet girls under 23. Let me start off by saying that personally I am picky with who I have sex with. As a result, I've only slept with a handful of women (far less than most of you guys I assume). I only do HB8+. It's much easier to bed HB8+ that are younger when you yourself are younger (in my experience). This makes it hard to get over girls when things go south...
I met this german girl, HB8+. We went out, I was funny and flirty, we clicked, next night I f-closed her. We have fun together, it was great, and though we were busy for the next three weeks we would meet up at all times of the day to have sex and hang out. After the first time we had sex, we talked briefly about expectations. She said she wasn't looking for a serious relationship, and I said I wasn't either (I won't be in a serious relationship with a girl who is so easily seduced). But, she said she only has sex with one guy at a time, and if she finds a new guy that she'd rather sleep with, she'd tell me and we'd be done. I was pretty confident in myself so I said it was fine by me (although it wasn't; who'd want to stop fucking a horny hottie?).
---
This is where I start fucking up (no pun intended). She texted me every morning, displayed 99% interest level, etc. I wasn't trying to make her my girlfriend, so I was challenging, but I started basically getting charmed by her. I slowly let her occupy more and more of my time until my interest level is basically 99% as well, even though I would never in my lifetime say I love this girl. I just wanted to see her all the time (and have sex with her. sex more than see her). I started being nice and romantic to her... taking her to the aquarium, setting up elaborate dates, doing things a man should only do for someone he's in a serious relationship with. Doing something a guy normally does when he's in love (I don't love her). I let my emotions get the best of me.
I stopped being a challenge, and eventually she found another guy who was "new" and "exciting" to her. She told me she wasn't going to sleep with me anymore because she wanted to try this new thing out. I was pissed, of course, but she said that this is how she is; she goes from one guy to another. Once one guy stops being "fun", she switches. However, I was different from most of the guys she slept with. She said I'd make a really good friend and still wants to be friends, even though normally she just ditches him.
---
This is where I start fucking up harder. I go out and try to find new girls. But I just kept coming across girls that are less than HB8 who I don't want to put my dick in. I couldn't stop thinking about the mind-blowing sex we had (she told me multiple times that it was damn good for her too). Since she told me I was such a good friend as well and she enjoyed my company so much, I thought I could convince her to stick with me. Big mistake. Luckily, this wuss-state lasted only a few days.
Finally, I go see her one last time. I said I'm not doing this friend bullshit. I want to take her home and fuck her brains out like I used to. She said she only sleeps with one guy at a time, and the only thing on her mind is this new guy (because he's such a mystery and is totally new). She said she'd get bored of him eventually and when she's done with him, and maybe we can see how it goes from there. I told her no. My final offer was the she continues fucking me, because she knows she likes it (and she still admitted that she likes it and would do it), and I'd be her friend as well. I don't give a shit what she does with this other dude. She said she only sleeps with 1 guy at a time so I said screw it and deleted her number and said goodbye.
---
Fast forward. I can't for the life of me find HB8's 20-23, much less ones that are sexually liberal and available. I've been missing sex with this girl. I totally would not mind just being fuck buddies with her. Is there any way to salvage this situation? Although, if I do manage to find another girl to bang, the problem would be solved as well.
TL;DR: I have a problem not so much with one-itis as can't-find-another-itis and although I fucked her brains out for a few weeks, I gave up challenge and she's banging a new guy (and she only does 1 guy at a time). What to do? Finding another girl is one possible solution but I'm having trouble with that so other solutions may be helpful.
There's an article Chase wrote about how girls first place you into:
Friends, then Providers, then Lovers.
I was in lovers, and got bumped to friends. How do I get back down?
I recently graduated from university and have moved to Shanghai to work. I'm 22 years old, and decently attractive I suppose. Naturally, when I came here it wasn't too hard to pick up girls. However, all of the girls in clubs and out on the street are at least 25 years old; the younger ones are in class in university. Since I'm working, it's hard to meet girls under 23. Let me start off by saying that personally I am picky with who I have sex with. As a result, I've only slept with a handful of women (far less than most of you guys I assume). I only do HB8+. It's much easier to bed HB8+ that are younger when you yourself are younger (in my experience). This makes it hard to get over girls when things go south...
I met this german girl, HB8+. We went out, I was funny and flirty, we clicked, next night I f-closed her. We have fun together, it was great, and though we were busy for the next three weeks we would meet up at all times of the day to have sex and hang out. After the first time we had sex, we talked briefly about expectations. She said she wasn't looking for a serious relationship, and I said I wasn't either (I won't be in a serious relationship with a girl who is so easily seduced). But, she said she only has sex with one guy at a time, and if she finds a new guy that she'd rather sleep with, she'd tell me and we'd be done. I was pretty confident in myself so I said it was fine by me (although it wasn't; who'd want to stop fucking a horny hottie?).
---
This is where I start fucking up (no pun intended). She texted me every morning, displayed 99% interest level, etc. I wasn't trying to make her my girlfriend, so I was challenging, but I started basically getting charmed by her. I slowly let her occupy more and more of my time until my interest level is basically 99% as well, even though I would never in my lifetime say I love this girl. I just wanted to see her all the time (and have sex with her. sex more than see her). I started being nice and romantic to her... taking her to the aquarium, setting up elaborate dates, doing things a man should only do for someone he's in a serious relationship with. Doing something a guy normally does when he's in love (I don't love her). I let my emotions get the best of me.
I stopped being a challenge, and eventually she found another guy who was "new" and "exciting" to her. She told me she wasn't going to sleep with me anymore because she wanted to try this new thing out. I was pissed, of course, but she said that this is how she is; she goes from one guy to another. Once one guy stops being "fun", she switches. However, I was different from most of the guys she slept with. She said I'd make a really good friend and still wants to be friends, even though normally she just ditches him.
---
This is where I start fucking up harder. I go out and try to find new girls. But I just kept coming across girls that are less than HB8 who I don't want to put my dick in. I couldn't stop thinking about the mind-blowing sex we had (she told me multiple times that it was damn good for her too). Since she told me I was such a good friend as well and she enjoyed my company so much, I thought I could convince her to stick with me. Big mistake. Luckily, this wuss-state lasted only a few days.
Finally, I go see her one last time. I said I'm not doing this friend bullshit. I want to take her home and fuck her brains out like I used to. She said she only sleeps with one guy at a time, and the only thing on her mind is this new guy (because he's such a mystery and is totally new). She said she'd get bored of him eventually and when she's done with him, and maybe we can see how it goes from there. I told her no. My final offer was the she continues fucking me, because she knows she likes it (and she still admitted that she likes it and would do it), and I'd be her friend as well. I don't give a shit what she does with this other dude. She said she only sleeps with 1 guy at a time so I said screw it and deleted her number and said goodbye.
---
Fast forward. I can't for the life of me find HB8's 20-23, much less ones that are sexually liberal and available. I've been missing sex with this girl. I totally would not mind just being fuck buddies with her. Is there any way to salvage this situation? Although, if I do manage to find another girl to bang, the problem would be solved as well.
TL;DR: I have a problem not so much with one-itis as can't-find-another-itis and although I fucked her brains out for a few weeks, I gave up challenge and she's banging a new guy (and she only does 1 guy at a time). What to do? Finding another girl is one possible solution but I'm having trouble with that so other solutions may be helpful.
There's an article Chase wrote about how girls first place you into:
Friends, then Providers, then Lovers.
I was in lovers, and got bumped to friends. How do I get back down?
