Relationship Hero: the future of online date coaching

[Chase]

I just found a date coaching company called "Relationship Hero" that went through Y-Combinator (Paul Graham's famed startup accelerator based out of Silicon Valley) in 2017, and has a bunch of other investors and has been profiled glowingly in papers like The New York Times and Business Insider.

At first I thought, "Uh-oh, maybe they're making a serious play at cornering the market!"

But then I had a gander at their coaching team.

We're really in trouble now...

Presenting...

A rogue's gallery of the most soyish Buzzfeed-y date coaching 'experts' you have ever seen:



Now featuring: gender pronouns, such as she/her and he/him!



Including several members of the gender-ambiguous community:



... and is that a transsexual on the right? It doesn't get more progressive than transsexual dating advice experts, let me tell you (these guys are leaving us in the dust!):



Featuring a relationship expert staff of no less than 50% Filipinos:



And best of all, there is even an attractive girl on the team... also responsible for 100% of their "advanced coaching" programs... and she comes equipped with an Instagram, a peculiar look, and an unconventional name!



This is definitely the A-Team right here.

The hilarious thing is the two founders are actually guys who obviously have way more testosterone than any of their male coaches, judging by their jawlines and looks:



You kind of wonder how a couple of masculine-looking guys who probably (one would guess) studied game ended up establishing a company like this.

Probably hasn't turned out precisely as they envisioned it, I'd reckon.

What can I say... the dating advice niche is hard...

Chase

 

[Train]

They have a mascot seems like:

But yeah, reading the Glassdoor reviews paints a bleak picture. One review: https://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Employee-Review-Relationship-Hero-RVW32286531.htm

To be taken with a grain of salt, of course.

 

[Gunwitch]

Alison looks like a school guidance counselor went AWOL.

Alyssa WILL put a used tampon in the turkey stuffing at thanksgiving dinner if she finds out your family votes Trump.

Ben is returning the one ring to Mordor so he isn't available.

Kala looks like she would get raped by thugs in a Deathwish movie from the 70s and jump to her death to escape.

The Jose immigrant smile is just awe inspiring "melting pot" diversity.

Marlena not currently accepting new clients as he finishes his sex change.

Yeah it is SUPER buzzfeed, wow.

Feels like the cast of a really unfunny office sitcom.

"our company policy is we give a polygraph to ensure that no employee has ever used a racial slur in their entire life"


Gun

 

[Teevster]

Notice how this one is the ONLY ONE WHO WAS instagram rofl.


Deep stuff coming from her:



----




I will MURDER... your hamster if you CHEAT on ME. And then I will film it, and FORCE YOU to watch me KILL your Hamster with a KNIFE. DIIIIIIE.


-----


Alyssa to me is the girl who tries hard to convince you thast it is masculine to get fucked by a strap on. It is also a good gesture to lick her boots and feet. She also at times need other dicks, preferably bigger than yours... and she will teach you how you can become a good boy by encouraging your wife to act upon her pleasure (of humiliating you)



I could go on. But this is just pure humor.

I never talked bad about our competitors. Sorry for breaking this rule chase

 

[Chase]

But yeah, reading the Glassdoor reviews paints a bleak picture. One review: https://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Employee-Review-Relationship-Hero-RVW32286531.htm

To be taken with a grain of salt, of course.

Wow, that employee review is harsh.

Looks like it's not the only one, either.

And yeah, I saw their hiring thing on Hacker News, which was where I heard about them. The rate is slightly increased to $15/hour, but it sounds like the coaching packages cost thousands of dollars.

For perspective... GC coaching packages also cost thousands of dollars, but the coaches make a whole lot more than what those coaches are making. And I have been actively telling Rob and the coaches to screen out mentally unwell clients because that's not what the program is for.

Whole thing basically just looks like a cynical cash grab: inflated prices, bare bones pay to just-off-the-street 'relationship experts' who are anything but (just minimum wage fools they throw a textbook at and tell to read it before they start pushing clients at them). A lot of them are Filipinos, who the reviews suggest are making $6/hour... Filipinos can be great in customer support roles, and some of the folks are on our customer support team are from the Philippines and they're awesome. But I've yet to encounter a genuine Filipino relationship expect.

Also... Paul Graham (the founder of YC, one of the investors in this company) has been paraphrased as saying, "If you have time to blog, you don't have time to run your company." But who's that I see on the company blog there?



Hmm...



They've got their COO in charge of writing SEO blog posts, I see.

I tell you, if I had a bunch of investor money, and I thought the best use of my time and money was writing SEO blog posts, I dunno how happy my investors would be.

(and yeah, I write for GC, but a.) I don't have a team of investors to please and b.) I just write whatever I want to write, and haven't actively done much SEO optimization on my own articles in years)

YC's standards must be slipping.

Feels like the cast of a really unfunny office sitcom.

lol

Alyssa to me is the girl who tries hard to convince you thast it is masculine to get fucked by a strap on.

...

I could go on. But this is just pure humor.

These jokes just write themselves, don't they?

I never talked bad about our competitors. Sorry for breaking this rule chase

Nor I.

Even kinda goofy guys IMO doing PUA coaching I will not mock.

But every once in a blue moon you see something so bizarre it is simply impossible to not point it out...

Chase

 

[Gunwitch]

But every once in a blue moon you see something so bizarre it is simply impossible to not point it out...

Brightened my morning


Gun

 

[Mike Silvertree]

This is just laughable. But, it shows that there is a huge market for useful how to meet and fuck women training.

Luckily for us, we are one of the last places on Earth that provides that.

 

[Bismarck]

But yeah, reading the Glassdoor reviews paints a bleak picture. One review: https://www.glassdoor.com/Reviews/Employee-Review-Relationship-Hero-RVW32286531.htm

Funny how a company with such a poor track record of employment conditions can be endorsed by the NYT - weren't these guys supposed to be on the side of workers?

Not anymore, it seems... In this day and age, you just have to hire guys who've chopped off their pipis, a team of mostly females (and females who've attached an iron cock to their former vajayjays), and people of different races (oops! I meant ethnicities) and you're doing the equivalent of the Lord's good work.

 

[Starboy]

Funny how a company with such a poor track record of employment conditions can be endorsed by the NYT - weren't these guys supposed to be on the side of workers?

Not anymore, it seems... In this day and age, you just have to hire guys who've chopped off their pipis, a team of mostly females (and females who've attached an iron cock to their former vajayjays), and people of different races (oops! I meant ethnicities) and you're doing the equivalent of the Lord's good work.

Don't forget you must be gender neutral! Don't want to assume someone's gender for them

 

[foggy]

dont visit their website unless you want to be retargeted by their cringey facebook ads.

 

[Chase]

dont visit their website unless you want to be retargeted by their cringey facebook ads.

Sorry to have brought this fate on you, @fog.

 

[dshen]

I've probably seen their ads about 30 times in the last few weeks, and I must say... it's just the worst ad I've ever seen on Facebook. Even viagra ads have been more creative. Equally bad is their landing page.
I guess when you're playing with investors money, who cares about ROI.

 

[foggy]

Sorry to have brought this fate on you, @fog.

its cool chase look forward to seeing what fate they get if they intrude on your market share

I've probably seen their ads about 30 times in the last few weeks, and I must say... it's just the worst ad I've ever seen on Facebook. Even viagra ads have been more creative. Equally bad is their landing page.
I guess when you're playing with investors money, who cares about ROI.

i spy someone throwing marketing concepts out the window in favor of bias. not sure what to make of it

 

[Gunwitch]

@Chase I'm working for them now, check out my profile:

 

[DarkKnight]

You defeated David X? I want to hear that story..

 

[Gunwitch]

It was in the thought bubble, but Sundar Pichai has scrubbed and censored it.