Socializing Running game in college bars as a non-student older guy.

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Was hoping this is something I could DM @Skills about since he is in Miami and this is specifically in the area but I cannot seem to do so. The only reason I give a crap is because I feel like this is winnable but me and my wings are just missing some direction here.

I have a unique situation.

In the middle of 2023, I lucked out and found a great apartment in what seemed to be a residential suburban area and it is a great spot. Usually, everyone who wants to run game in Miami goes to Miami Beach or they go to Brickell, some go to Wynnwood for nightgame since it is popping. My area of the city is relatively older but on Thursdays, I started to find that something happens.

The 4 or 5 bars in my area which are dead on a Saturday night and even on a Friday night get swarmed by college kids that go to UM aka The Canes. For those who do not know, UM is a rich kids' party school full of wealthier kids from the northeast. Even though the college is a few miles away from this place, I am right next to it. By that I mean I walk downstairs from where I live and the bars are right there. FWIW, I am 28 so not really supposed to be in a college environment but I can pass for a college kid because they said I look young.

My only reason for even gaming is because it is literally downstairs from where I live and instead of having to drive or take a 10 min Uber, I just roll out my spot and am there. I am closer to these bars than these college kids are.

Logistics-wise, this works out way better for me than trying to game in Brickell or the beach. Even better, this is mainly street game as a lot of these bars have a huge outdoors area where you can just talk to everyone.

However, gaming has been a complete and utter nightmare. Here are some roadblocks my wings and I have run into.

The main one is we open what seems to be a two-set but it quickly turns into a 6-set out of nowhere as everyone knows each other. From there, the set seems to die on out. We are basically 2 guys trying to handle a 6-set and if it is a mixed one, forget about it. This happens all the time, we cannot get a solid 2 or even 3 set to work. We have maybe a minute max to talk to a girl before it turns out that she knows everyone in the area and her friends or classmates just come into the set. We have not run into this anywhere else but we run into this here all the time.

The other obstacle has honestly been my wings. I kind of open a lot but my wings have been deer in headlights in this spot. They just gaze or they just stand around, their energy is not there. These guys can do alright with daygame but it is like they are a fish out of water in this environment and I cannot even imagine nightgaming here alone. I am not even sure WTF happens to my wings, they turn into deer in headlights and cannot freaking approach in this environment. Usually, I am approaching and they are coming off as really awkward.

My wings are driving me nuts because it is like they just stand around and think all night or go full-on deer in headlights. Like I want to shake them and yell wake up but I am not that kind of guy. I feel like I am doing all the work in this environment and I have never felt like that when winging with them in other environments not like it.

I have been wondering at this point if I am looking at a mirage or what.

There are one group of guys who seem to be outsiders that get traction in this spot though. These guys have a camera and light and they go around interviewing girls for what seems to be a YouTube channel. Girls seem receptive to that and they seem fun. I have thought about doing this because at least these guys are getting traction and building status.

 

[Michael Chief]

Yo man forget gimmicks like carrying around a mic and camera. Trying to rely on gimmicks is what leads to fuzzy hats and magic tricks.

The main difference between "real life game" and trying to game college girls in a college environment is that, for the latter, you need a special kind of social proof. It's a big ol' meta social circle game.

If you're just a random dude doing cold approaches, you're instantly at a huge disadvantage. Imagine the best case scenario being the president of the top fraternity of that university: everyone at the school knows who you are, you're a trusted member of their community, and being connected to you can give them a lot of social advantages. Tons of college girls would want to fuck that guy.

In order to emulate some of the same advantages that the frat president has, you need to start socially investing in the places you're trying to game. Pick two or three of your favorite bars in that area and keep going extremely regularly. For at least a few weeks, don't go there to hit on girls. Befriend the owners, staff, and regular customers. Make them think you're a cool and friendly guy. Be fun. Build real friendships and connections and loyalty with those people. They will be your best wingmen/wingwomen. Positive rumors will eventually spread about you.

it turns out that she knows everyone in the area

In other words, you need to become this person. If a college kid can do this, surely you can, too. And it's very doable with that social investment little by little, no matter what age you are. I did it when I was in college and I did it again in my thirties. Even had a full-on LTR with one of these college girls a couple years ago that lasted about a year.

With this strategy, I don't need PUA wingmen that I bring out with me. I can just go to one of these bars at any time and my friends are already there. They're the owners, bartenders, and half the customers who happen to be there. I can grab any one of them to wing me without using PUA jargon. Even better if that impromptu wing is a woman. And these are normal, cool people who happen to have connections with other people in that college community, most likely. Their social proof will rub off on you.

After setting all this up, let's say you're talking to a couple of girls and a bunch more show up and it turns into a 6-set. Best case scenario is you happen to already know some of the people who are joining the set. Even if you don't, it's likely that you would have perhaps seen one of them before, so you get an in that way.

By the way, I talk about these kinds of social circle strategies in my upcoming book which will be published to Amazon on February 1st. Keep an eye on the Marketplace forum for an announcement that day!

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

@Michael Chief

You made some great points. Our goal right now is to actually get the IGs of all of these girls, improve our IGs, and then as we add them we DHV on our Instagrams over months and have a lot of women who already follow us. However, I think there may be a nuance I missed or forgot to mention.

The most high-volume area where we approach is not actually a bar or even a venue, it is like this large alley of a street where there are tons of college kids just socializing. In other words, any kind of "staff" becomes irrelevant. Even in the venues we do go inside, the staff are overworked and for the most part, doing damage control. It is a different vibe compared to the college towns I have gamed in where staff at the venues are of higher status and often the students themselves. Here, the staff are significantly older and kind of just there doing their jobs.

We have made friends with some of the staff though but comes time to be in the venues, they are overworked and often trying to hold down the fort. The inside of most of these venues is not even that fruitful in terms of having sets either.

We don't even bother to go into the bar because it is small, and packed, mostly dudes playing pool, and some people doing karaoke. I planned to do that and I did the singing for a few weeks but got left in the dust by my wings who could not show up early enough and managed to always be over an hour late.

We have acknowledged between us that if we "cold approach" we are toast. We cannot go in direct because then we get that creep reputation. Instead, we have started to consider "spam socializing" meaning we just go up to people and make small talk with no sexual intent behind it.

The thing has been that we just come up against these magical 6-sets that appear out of nowhere to break into any set we do.

So I tried to Instagram close girls and even that is tough to do.

For one, I cannot get my wings onboard with this for some reason but I won't pin too much on them.

It is tough to even get an approach in because women are constantly on the move in this area and they are often in larger mixed sets that keep mingling with each other. Like even indirectly going in often gets met with some walls.

I have had some luck here and there though but it's been a tough environment.

This is also not your typical college, it is a private university full of rich kids that party hard. I am trying to slowly figure out the piece of this puzzle but for the most part, we do understand that being the typical PUA here will bite us. At this point, I am going to start to say I from now on because I feel like most nights, my wings have hurt me more than helped me.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Also to anyone on this forum who lives in Miami, please feel free to DM me. I am looking for good nightgame wings for Thursdays and Fridays and I know the high-volume spots as well as the exact times to be at them.

My goal is to really get the volume in for Fridays but on Thursdays, pull off this feat of cracking the college code as an older dude like @Michael Chief did. Maybe we can go out these next few weeks, put ourselves in the thick of the action, and then report back with newer and newer findings that guys like @Michael Chief can give feedback on.

Here are the problems I am running into with current wings.

1. Lives too far away and has to bust his a$$ to even make it out to Miami and I feel bad for dragging him out here. The dude cannot be on time even when he tries because of how crazy the traffic gets. Overall a good dude with game knowledge and a hustler but the logistics are biting him hard.

2. More social media and online game-oriented, overall a cool dude but isn't really "there" because he already has massive abundance outside of nightgame so he has little reason to actually care. I don't fault him, great guy and a great friend I would stick my neck out on the line for but he is more than set with women and is more about chilling on a night than wasting much time here.

Happy to talk to all of you about my style to see if we work well together.

I am big on socializing a lot in the night and doing lots of sets but at the same time, I pride myself on picking the right venues and not wasting time on crappy ones. I am also keen on timing and getting into venues at certain times when it is peak hours as opposed to at the tail end and hoping to get lucky.

I try to be nice and good to people so hopefully we can all get along.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

More things I have witnessed when looking at my personal notes from outings.

1. Mixed sets are a huge no-no in this environment. Like I have met mixed sets in other environments that were cool but here, the guys are way more combative, defensive, and closed off than the girls are. We often find that if we enter a mixed set, the girls will be responsive but guys will immediately hate us for it.

2. There are tons of dudes who seem to be college dudes just wandering around doing "game", usually drinking a lot and trying to cold approach girls. It is strange because I did not see this as much in college towns but I see it way more here.

3. The girls are not down for any kind of "friendly" encounter per se, it is like they either like you or they don't. I mean if they are not into you, even indirectly just socializing with them does not work. Trying to find more workarounds to this and implement more of your advice.

4. Kind of like number 1 but we have run into a lot of circles or groups that are flat-out closed off and just want to be left alone or not talk to outsiders.

5. Kind of redundant but women here do not stand still and socialize, they are always on the move so it is tough to find a standing still set. My wings have complained about this a lot and this trips them up in the environment. This really trips us up because you cannot socialize as easily with women and if you chase after them, then you are the typical pickup guy.

What we can change and fix though.

1. There is a lot me and especially my wings haven't done, due to number 5, we have been sitting ducks. We go out and do not even do 5 sets some nights and it is pissing me off. We think too much and are in the "omg lets not do PUA in a college environment" mode when I think we just need to socialize and worry less. Don't do game and try to pull, just socialize.

2. We keep disagreeing on how to approach this. I want to just mass socialize, collect IGs, build up contacts, and all of that. One wing wants to try and pull that night which I think is shortsighted. The other wing wants to try and number close which I like but he is not in town consistently.

Happy to take on a couple of new wings in Miami for this project. DM me for details as this is a high-volume area every Thursday. I am hoping the wings I take on can post here as well and share their perspectives over the course of the next few weeks.

 

[Michael Chief]

Shit, man. Sounds chaotic as hell. I cannot give a definitive answer because I can't recall ever trying to do pickup in exactly the type of environment you're describing, but I encourage you to experiment with a few things based on what works in what I think might be similar environments:

Flash game - This meta game method is all about drawing attention to yourself (or your group) by making it clear to everyone around that you (or your group) are having the most fun out of anyone else there. Imagine a pack of RSD dudes on cocaine chanting some shit about getting in state. Or a flash dance mob. Or that one guy in the club who's having the time of his life, dancing his ass off and screaming every lyric at the top of his lungs, because he's celebrating something special and he feels on top of the world.

Social momentum - Rather than "approaching," focus on building up social momentum by having as many small social interactions as you can without hesitating. Greeting random passersby, high fiving them, giving compliments and immediately moving on, etc. You can either use that social momentum to feed into flash game, or "re-open" targets and sets with high energy if you happen to see them again.

Hidden gems - SURELY there must be some bars or venues with a different vibe around there. Explore until you find different kinds of places, keep those places in mind, and use that as a bounce location where you can take girls you approached in those chaotic areas.

Just think like a scientist and focus on experimenting. You say that you and your wings disagree on how to approach this, but just try everything and see what works best for you.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Just think like a scientist and focus on experimenting. You say that you and your wings disagree on how to approach this, but just try everything and see what works best for you.

Yeah man, I have to say that in years, this is the most difficult game environment I have been a part of. Any Miami nightgamer up for a challenge, feel free to DM me and I will tell you exactly what area it is. Maybe you can share your take and show me something I do not know? The older I have gotten though, I have ironically taken your approach to the game more. I guess I genuinely enjoy the challenges and complexities of such an environment. Just for your reference, the kids are mainly from a college referred to as "The U" which Miami locals are familiar with.

You are dealing with rich college kids here who primarily come from the East Coast. Even compared to your average university, the crowd is genuinely more stuck up and comes from some money. Consider it USC (So Cal) with lower admission standards.

So far, here is what I have noticed to work.

1. Street game on certain girls who are in pairs of 2 or 3 at max.

2. Peacock with a funny shirt. My wing a while back wore a hilarious shirt and it got girls to open him.

3. The place does have a karaoke so perhaps a bold man can get up and sing.

My issue now is that my main wing had something major come up and will be taking a break from game so now I have to tackle it solo. I do have some ideas though.

It feels like the place oscillates between being a treasure versus a mirage.

The treasure part is that literally no other place in Miami gets flooded with college girls on Thursdays like this part of the city does. The mirage being that perhaps the PUAs and Game Experts in the city have specifically avoided the area due to how tough the crowd is there.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I try not to believe in the superstitious too much or things like fate or whatever it is called. However, I find this entire situation I am in kind of hilarious. Back when I was in college, I was not the big man on campus and did poorly with the popular girl types. For years, I pondered how I would make up for lost time as I got older and eventually have success with them. This is when the whole idea of men peaking at 35 and being attractive to women of all age groups was floating around the male space.

Then at some point, I hit a bit of a stride and found pleasure in talking to women over the age of 25 or just women no longer in college. I had some fun talking to that fun tourist, that professional woman with her life together, and the list goes on. Then, I moved to what I thought was kind of a more mature area of Miami that I fell in love with. I'd go there on weekdays and just love the vibe even though it was a bit older. In my mind, I thought I was done with it all.

It just so happens that true some weird mix of events, this shows up at my door steps and I am laughing. It is like I ran away from something or some situation I failed at in life (getting hot college girls) and ran somewhere else. Then, that very situation showed up right at my doorstep when I was actually trying to get away from it at first.

But I no longer see this situation as some past bully coming to pick a fight, I see it as fate putting a litmus test in front of me, asking me how much have I really changed from the insecure, lost, cynical, negative, and bitter kid I was almost a decade ago?

It's like in a sport where a team plays a certain team, gets their asses handed to them by that team, but then recovers for the rest of the season to be at its peak form. Then, the very team that beat them is waiting for them in the playoffs.

The new me is subconsciously waiting with a smile and almost happy that we have this round 2.

 

[JT Sunshine]

The new me is subconsciously waiting with a smile and almost happy that we have this round 2.

Following, cause I feel I’m in a similar logistical situation as you.

I live about 25 minutes away from the main bar/club areas in my city, but I live about three minutes away from this little bar that is dead on the weekends, but is PACKED on Thursday night with tons of HOT girls who all go to the same rich private college.

I’m currently getting back in the game after a looong hiatus, and my thought was to practice practice practice at the high-volume clubs until my game is sharp, then once I’m better I can come crush it at this little spot that is full of STUNNERS (as well as a couple other college bars I know of) and save the long drive/uber sometimes.

However, I remember from being there for a coworker bday party a couple years back that pretty much anyone I talked to asked if I went to said college, then got rather cold after I said no. Like it was all one big social circle. Wasn’t even trying to game. I’m also ten years removed from college (I do look younger than my age, but not that young). Maybe that’s only a mental barrier but I feel like it wouldn’t help my chances there.

Point being, if you figure out what works, I’d love to try it out here. Sitting on a literal gold mine, but I don’t want to go fk it up in one night. Also, jealous you live in Miami. Had some wild times down there back in the day. I’m sure I’ll return sometime…