I wrote a post a few months back about a long distance ex I wanted back.
viewtopic.php?f=7&t=7562
It's kinda long, so to keep it short....
I'm from Ireland, was dating a Canadian girl while we were both living in Australia.
She moved back to Canada, we broke up, I was devastated and I wanted her back.
For years I've been thinking about moving to Canada because it's closer to home.
Now to bring things up to date........
After we broke up, I went completely NC with her.
1 morning I wake up with an email from an old project manager (who I worked with and is from my home town) who is working in Canada, offering me a 2 year contract starting in April in a city 1.5 hours from my ex home town. I kept it to myself for a couple days, didn't tell anyone. 1 day I'm out with friends having lunch and 1 of them asks has anyone got any news. So I tell them about the job offer. Within seconds my ex sends me a text out of the blue asking me how I am. Now at this stage, we hadn't talked in about 3months.
And the people I was with didn't know her and the old project manager in Canada defiantly doesn't know her. So it was weird that she text me when she did.
So about 5 hours later I replied saying I was doing fine and asked her how say was. She said she was fine and asked more questions to keep conversation going. So we text through out the day, last message she sent me and I didn't reply.
A couple days later I reply to the last message she sent me and from then on we were texting flat out for just over a week.
She kept asking me about what I've been up to and give her updates on what's going on since we broke up. I told her lots, but I wouldn't tell her about the job offer as I had to make this decision for myself. If I took it I'm doing it for myself, not to get back with her.
Eventually she told me she missed me, regrets breaking up, still has feelings for me and wished we could go for coffee to talk and sort things out.
So then I had to tell her about the job and tell her I still have feelings for her to!! Told her I could be in canada around the end of March, start of April. I also told her I was going home for Xmas. She was delighted about it but made me promise I was taking it for myself not for her.
About 2 weeks go by and I'm planning on booking my flights back home. 1 of my friends says instead of flying direct to ireland, why don't I fly to canada for a couple days to see the city I'll be working in (still at this stage I hadn't decided on taking the job), see if I like it there and ask my ex if she would like to meet up and see what happiness.
So I ask her...... She says yeah, she would love to meet up!! I tell her I'm not going to book anything yet as I'll have to organise dates, move out of my house and sell furniture. That's fine.
We're still talking every day, she tells me she still loves me and can't wait to see me. Brings up us getting back together, starts talking about a future together again.
Eventually I move out, sell what I needed to sell and tell my ex I want to organise dates with her. She freaks out asking me why I need to talk dates with her. So I tell her, we need to talk dates so she can book time off work to come down to me. She says she's not booking anything off work just yet, when it comes closer to the time, if she feels like booking time off she will. I left it for a couple days and asked her is everything ok and she apologies saying she was stressed that week because she's applying for a new job and doesn't want to ask for time off so soon. I understood.
A couple more days go by and she's still telling me she loves me, sending me pictures of herself and saying words cannot describe how excited she is that she will see me soon. So I decided to book the flights and a 5 star hotel and told her the dates I'll be there and when I leave, which was 6 weeks away. Figured if she wants to see me, she will put the effort in and come see me. Seeing as I'm flying the long way home just to see her for a couple days.
2 days later she goes cold on me. Since we started back talking, we were talking every day, soon as I book the flights, I don't hear from her. So after a week of not hearing from her ill call her out on it. I asked what's up, if she doesn't want me coming to tell me straight out so I can make other plans or cancel the flights and get the money back. She says there's nothing wrong, she got the new job, has been so busy doing training for it and it's in the city I got offered the job. She has to travel 1.5 hours each way to work, when she gets home she is exhausted and just goes straight to bed. So again I say fine, I understand. At this stage I did really care because I met this little hottie out a couple nights before and started having casual sex with her. So she was keeping me entertained while my ex was being cold. But that still didn't change the feelings I had for my ex, I still loved her.
Over the next couple days/weeks there's texts here and there from her. I was applying more contact at this stage.
It came to my birthday and she text me saying happy birthday, she can't wait to celebrate it when I'm over there. Her birthday is a week after mine, so I text her saying happy birthday, looking forward to celebrate our birthdays together. She replied saying she was upset because she didn't do anything for it with friends, only with family and she wishes a special someone was with her to celebrate. She asked me to call but I couldn't because I was out with the little hottie. I told her I was busy, I'd call later and she just said don't bother.
It comes to 2 nights before I fly out. She says we need to talk about plans for when I get there. I asked her what's to talk about? She knew when I arrived, she knew when I was leaving and she knew the hotel I booked for us. She said she was going to collect me from the airport and stay with me the whole time I'm in canada. But the second night I was there her Xmas party was on, which she was going to and the day after that she had a Xmas lunch with her family. But once they were over she was going to be with me the rest of the time. I figured that was ok, as I could get over the jet lag when she was doing her own thing.
So I fly out and it turns out a connecting flight was delayed by 6 hours. I was supposed to arrive in canada at 7.30pm but didn't arrive until 1.30am!! So that was the first night fucked!! By the time we got to the hotel it was 3am. We just ordered pizza because it was to late to go anywhere, chatted for about an hour and went to bed. No kissing or anything!!
Next morning we get up around 11am, go for breakfast, go the bank (I had to exchange money), go shopping (she had to get new shoes for the Xmas party) and then for a few drinks. The day was fine, we talked and laughed like we used to, she kept holding my hand when we were walking around. Around 5pm she had to get ready for her Xmas party and left at 6. When she was leaving she asked me what I was going to do for the night and I told her I was going to meet up with friends living in the city.
I also have a couple friends from my home town living in that city and I hadn't seen in about 2 years. I messaged them when I booked my flights and told them I would be there for a few days.
I was ment to meet them for drinks at 8 but ended up falling asleep and didn't wake up until around 11!! I figured it was to late to meet them when I woke up, so I just went to the hotel bar for a few drinks. I went to bed around 1am and my ex gets back from her Xmas party around 1.30. As soon as she comes in the door she jumps on top of me and starts kissing me!!! Then we started fooling around and having sex.... About 5 minutes into it she asks me have I slept with anyone since we broke up and stupidly enough I said yeah!!!! I donno why, I just wasn't thinking!!! She gets really pissed off because she says she hasn't been with anyone since me. I tried to defend my saying she broke up with me, i only slept with someone because I thought she was doing the same and we weren't together so she can't be mad.
If she had of slept with someone, it wouldn't have really phased me. Sex is sex right!!!!??
So she says she doesn't want to have sex anymore, we stop and just go asleep.
Next morning we wake up and she has to leave early for the Xmas lunch. When she was getting ready I asked her what was that all about last night and she says never mind she was drunk. Again I defend myself saying what I said in bed the night before and she says it's fine. So I ask her what's going on with us, does she still have feelings or what? She says I'm thinking to much about us getting back together and we'll talk about it later. She brought 4 bags with her to the hotel, she said she couldn't decide what she wanted to wear and decided to bring all her bags home so she could sort out what clothes she wanted for the rest of the time. I walk her out to her car and she kisses me before she gets in. She told me to let her know what I was doing later and she would text me when she was on her way back from her parents probably around 6, and we could go for dinner.
So I end up meeting my friends for drinks that afternoon. I text her when I'm on the way to my friends to let her know where I'll be, she doesn't reply. I return to the hotel around 6.30 and she isn't there. Try calling, no answer.
Around 7.30 she sends me a text saying she wasn't coming back and the trip isn't going to work out the way we planned!!
I try calling, texting, asking what's going on, asking for the decency to explain why she wasn't coming back ..... Nothing. She even turned her phone off!!! Again this girl shattered my heart. We seen each other face to face for about 8hours!!
I was so upset, I ended up staying in that night. Next day I try ring the ex again to find out what the fuck is going on, she just keeps cancelling my calls, won't reply to my texts..... Nothing off her. So I decided to cut the trip short and fly back to ireland a couple days earlier.
I get back to ireland, not even a message a couple day later to see if I'm alive. I text her on Xmas day, wishing her a merry Xmas and happy new year. Saying I know things didn't work out and that's fine. if I decide to take the job, I hope we can remain friends on some sort of level and meet up for coffee 1 day........ Nothing off her!!!
About 2 weeks go by and I'm on a night out with my friends. I was hammered and sent her a snapchat by mistake. She screen shots the picture. When I seen she screen shot the picture I try to call her, which she doesn't answer! Then I sent her a text saying I was trying to call, is she ok. She replied she's fine but why does she need to tell me that. I said because I still care about you and want to know how you are, I hope we can remain friends. Then she texts back saying she doesn't want to be friends and never wants to talk to me again. I ask her why? What did I do?..... She doesn't reply and blocks my number and blocks me on Facebook.
I haven't heard from her since......
Now here's the thing.....
Since being back in Ireland I've spoke to my parents about the job offer and I'm going to be taking the job.
It's closer to home, which means it's easier to visit ireland
I'll be getting paid more than I was in Australia, which is a bonus
My career can go further working in canada than it was in Australia
And I've always wanted to live in canada and travel around canada and USA
When my ex collected me from the airport and we where driving to the hotel. She pointed out an apartment block right beside our hotel that her best friend is living in. She told me she is going to be moving in with her friend around April/may.
I'm nearly sure 1 of my friends from home is living in the same block. When I met my friends for drinks, I met them in the bar next to the apartment block and 1 of them pointed out his apartment. And all my friends over there live in the same area, less than a 3 minute walk from each other!!!
When I move over, more than likely I'll be living in that area as my friends are there.
Should I contact my ex a couple weeks before I move over to let her know I took the job and where I'll be living????
Or should I just leave it?? There's a good chance we could bump into each other, and if we do I don't want her to get the impression I'm moving over there just to get back with her.
Someone please give there advise???!!
Thanks.
viewtopic.php?f=7&t=7562
It's kinda long, so to keep it short....
I'm from Ireland, was dating a Canadian girl while we were both living in Australia.
She moved back to Canada, we broke up, I was devastated and I wanted her back.
For years I've been thinking about moving to Canada because it's closer to home.
Now to bring things up to date........
After we broke up, I went completely NC with her.
1 morning I wake up with an email from an old project manager (who I worked with and is from my home town) who is working in Canada, offering me a 2 year contract starting in April in a city 1.5 hours from my ex home town. I kept it to myself for a couple days, didn't tell anyone. 1 day I'm out with friends having lunch and 1 of them asks has anyone got any news. So I tell them about the job offer. Within seconds my ex sends me a text out of the blue asking me how I am. Now at this stage, we hadn't talked in about 3months.
And the people I was with didn't know her and the old project manager in Canada defiantly doesn't know her. So it was weird that she text me when she did.
So about 5 hours later I replied saying I was doing fine and asked her how say was. She said she was fine and asked more questions to keep conversation going. So we text through out the day, last message she sent me and I didn't reply.
A couple days later I reply to the last message she sent me and from then on we were texting flat out for just over a week.
She kept asking me about what I've been up to and give her updates on what's going on since we broke up. I told her lots, but I wouldn't tell her about the job offer as I had to make this decision for myself. If I took it I'm doing it for myself, not to get back with her.
Eventually she told me she missed me, regrets breaking up, still has feelings for me and wished we could go for coffee to talk and sort things out.
So then I had to tell her about the job and tell her I still have feelings for her to!! Told her I could be in canada around the end of March, start of April. I also told her I was going home for Xmas. She was delighted about it but made me promise I was taking it for myself not for her.
About 2 weeks go by and I'm planning on booking my flights back home. 1 of my friends says instead of flying direct to ireland, why don't I fly to canada for a couple days to see the city I'll be working in (still at this stage I hadn't decided on taking the job), see if I like it there and ask my ex if she would like to meet up and see what happiness.
So I ask her...... She says yeah, she would love to meet up!! I tell her I'm not going to book anything yet as I'll have to organise dates, move out of my house and sell furniture. That's fine.
We're still talking every day, she tells me she still loves me and can't wait to see me. Brings up us getting back together, starts talking about a future together again.
Eventually I move out, sell what I needed to sell and tell my ex I want to organise dates with her. She freaks out asking me why I need to talk dates with her. So I tell her, we need to talk dates so she can book time off work to come down to me. She says she's not booking anything off work just yet, when it comes closer to the time, if she feels like booking time off she will. I left it for a couple days and asked her is everything ok and she apologies saying she was stressed that week because she's applying for a new job and doesn't want to ask for time off so soon. I understood.
A couple more days go by and she's still telling me she loves me, sending me pictures of herself and saying words cannot describe how excited she is that she will see me soon. So I decided to book the flights and a 5 star hotel and told her the dates I'll be there and when I leave, which was 6 weeks away. Figured if she wants to see me, she will put the effort in and come see me. Seeing as I'm flying the long way home just to see her for a couple days.
2 days later she goes cold on me. Since we started back talking, we were talking every day, soon as I book the flights, I don't hear from her. So after a week of not hearing from her ill call her out on it. I asked what's up, if she doesn't want me coming to tell me straight out so I can make other plans or cancel the flights and get the money back. She says there's nothing wrong, she got the new job, has been so busy doing training for it and it's in the city I got offered the job. She has to travel 1.5 hours each way to work, when she gets home she is exhausted and just goes straight to bed. So again I say fine, I understand. At this stage I did really care because I met this little hottie out a couple nights before and started having casual sex with her. So she was keeping me entertained while my ex was being cold. But that still didn't change the feelings I had for my ex, I still loved her.
Over the next couple days/weeks there's texts here and there from her. I was applying more contact at this stage.
It came to my birthday and she text me saying happy birthday, she can't wait to celebrate it when I'm over there. Her birthday is a week after mine, so I text her saying happy birthday, looking forward to celebrate our birthdays together. She replied saying she was upset because she didn't do anything for it with friends, only with family and she wishes a special someone was with her to celebrate. She asked me to call but I couldn't because I was out with the little hottie. I told her I was busy, I'd call later and she just said don't bother.
It comes to 2 nights before I fly out. She says we need to talk about plans for when I get there. I asked her what's to talk about? She knew when I arrived, she knew when I was leaving and she knew the hotel I booked for us. She said she was going to collect me from the airport and stay with me the whole time I'm in canada. But the second night I was there her Xmas party was on, which she was going to and the day after that she had a Xmas lunch with her family. But once they were over she was going to be with me the rest of the time. I figured that was ok, as I could get over the jet lag when she was doing her own thing.
So I fly out and it turns out a connecting flight was delayed by 6 hours. I was supposed to arrive in canada at 7.30pm but didn't arrive until 1.30am!! So that was the first night fucked!! By the time we got to the hotel it was 3am. We just ordered pizza because it was to late to go anywhere, chatted for about an hour and went to bed. No kissing or anything!!
Next morning we get up around 11am, go for breakfast, go the bank (I had to exchange money), go shopping (she had to get new shoes for the Xmas party) and then for a few drinks. The day was fine, we talked and laughed like we used to, she kept holding my hand when we were walking around. Around 5pm she had to get ready for her Xmas party and left at 6. When she was leaving she asked me what I was going to do for the night and I told her I was going to meet up with friends living in the city.
I also have a couple friends from my home town living in that city and I hadn't seen in about 2 years. I messaged them when I booked my flights and told them I would be there for a few days.
I was ment to meet them for drinks at 8 but ended up falling asleep and didn't wake up until around 11!! I figured it was to late to meet them when I woke up, so I just went to the hotel bar for a few drinks. I went to bed around 1am and my ex gets back from her Xmas party around 1.30. As soon as she comes in the door she jumps on top of me and starts kissing me!!! Then we started fooling around and having sex.... About 5 minutes into it she asks me have I slept with anyone since we broke up and stupidly enough I said yeah!!!! I donno why, I just wasn't thinking!!! She gets really pissed off because she says she hasn't been with anyone since me. I tried to defend my saying she broke up with me, i only slept with someone because I thought she was doing the same and we weren't together so she can't be mad.
If she had of slept with someone, it wouldn't have really phased me. Sex is sex right!!!!??
So she says she doesn't want to have sex anymore, we stop and just go asleep.
Next morning we wake up and she has to leave early for the Xmas lunch. When she was getting ready I asked her what was that all about last night and she says never mind she was drunk. Again I defend myself saying what I said in bed the night before and she says it's fine. So I ask her what's going on with us, does she still have feelings or what? She says I'm thinking to much about us getting back together and we'll talk about it later. She brought 4 bags with her to the hotel, she said she couldn't decide what she wanted to wear and decided to bring all her bags home so she could sort out what clothes she wanted for the rest of the time. I walk her out to her car and she kisses me before she gets in. She told me to let her know what I was doing later and she would text me when she was on her way back from her parents probably around 6, and we could go for dinner.
So I end up meeting my friends for drinks that afternoon. I text her when I'm on the way to my friends to let her know where I'll be, she doesn't reply. I return to the hotel around 6.30 and she isn't there. Try calling, no answer.
Around 7.30 she sends me a text saying she wasn't coming back and the trip isn't going to work out the way we planned!!
I try calling, texting, asking what's going on, asking for the decency to explain why she wasn't coming back ..... Nothing. She even turned her phone off!!! Again this girl shattered my heart. We seen each other face to face for about 8hours!!
I was so upset, I ended up staying in that night. Next day I try ring the ex again to find out what the fuck is going on, she just keeps cancelling my calls, won't reply to my texts..... Nothing off her. So I decided to cut the trip short and fly back to ireland a couple days earlier.
I get back to ireland, not even a message a couple day later to see if I'm alive. I text her on Xmas day, wishing her a merry Xmas and happy new year. Saying I know things didn't work out and that's fine. if I decide to take the job, I hope we can remain friends on some sort of level and meet up for coffee 1 day........ Nothing off her!!!
About 2 weeks go by and I'm on a night out with my friends. I was hammered and sent her a snapchat by mistake. She screen shots the picture. When I seen she screen shot the picture I try to call her, which she doesn't answer! Then I sent her a text saying I was trying to call, is she ok. She replied she's fine but why does she need to tell me that. I said because I still care about you and want to know how you are, I hope we can remain friends. Then she texts back saying she doesn't want to be friends and never wants to talk to me again. I ask her why? What did I do?..... She doesn't reply and blocks my number and blocks me on Facebook.
I haven't heard from her since......
Now here's the thing.....
Since being back in Ireland I've spoke to my parents about the job offer and I'm going to be taking the job.
It's closer to home, which means it's easier to visit ireland
I'll be getting paid more than I was in Australia, which is a bonus
My career can go further working in canada than it was in Australia
And I've always wanted to live in canada and travel around canada and USA
When my ex collected me from the airport and we where driving to the hotel. She pointed out an apartment block right beside our hotel that her best friend is living in. She told me she is going to be moving in with her friend around April/may.
I'm nearly sure 1 of my friends from home is living in the same block. When I met my friends for drinks, I met them in the bar next to the apartment block and 1 of them pointed out his apartment. And all my friends over there live in the same area, less than a 3 minute walk from each other!!!
When I move over, more than likely I'll be living in that area as my friends are there.
Should I contact my ex a couple weeks before I move over to let her know I took the job and where I'll be living????
Or should I just leave it?? There's a good chance we could bump into each other, and if we do I don't want her to get the impression I'm moving over there just to get back with her.
Someone please give there advise???!!
Thanks.
