Should I date a girl who smokes weed, or has an addiction?

[Inferno]

I'm on Meetme, A dating site , and I always see these girls smoking weed. I often think, "is it right to talk to her if she is smoking/ has an addiction?"
I know that a lot of people have different experiences with drugs, but from what I know about drugs from my father and uncle's addiction, is that addiction can be next to impossible for some people. I also think, why would a girl want to change herself for someone she barley even knows. I also know people at school who smoke, but these people are low achievers, so I can assume that some people have a hard time preforming their best on the drug. The main concern I have is with her emotional state. I know doing something illegal can provide a rush for a girl, but I know from my late father that drugs are not the thrill you need in the longrun. Drugs, Heroine , ruined his high paying factory job at 18, then he resorted to a life of drug dealing. Back to the emotional state, this could clearly mess you up if she's withdrawing , and that's the day she met you. In the long term, it could probably cause me to experiment, and because I'm the child of a drug addict, maybe that might increase the chance of me becoming addicted. I also wonder how that effects her orgasm , when I get to that point with girls, will she be less excited because the weed's messing her brain up, like the effects of porn on our psyche? This makes me feel that these girls are not candidates for dating .

I want to be a "bad boy" that girls like, but I think that a lot of people think that being a edgy and cool guy revolves around smoking weed.

I don't smoke , and don't intend to start picking up bad habits. But sometimes I let my mind wander into that territory. " what if I smoked weed? " I always would think that I would be really cool and socially accepted, maybe even do better at art. These are all probably false however, just idiotic thoughts sold to me by the media.

An opposing argument could be that she's a one night stand. I can see where this is going, but if you're only together for a couple nights with no relationship, I guess that she's not " dating you" in a long term relationship.

Does anyone have a counterargument? I'd love to hear one.

 

[Troy]

Inferno,

I'd advice that you listen to your gut. Based on past experiences you can predict what might happen. Find your niche. Look for the girl's that don't make you say blah. What type of qualities do you look for in a woman? Write them down and to assist you, download Chase's free eBook, " Finding Your Niche ".

Girl's who drink, use drugs, and have high sex partners are broken women. Some more or less. If you want then go for these girl's. Sleep with them if you want but be wary of long-term relationships with them. I hope someone else chimes in to give you tips.

Troy

 

[Lotus]

First off, don't enter into a relationship trying to change someone or change yourself for someone else. People can only change themselves.

But drugs aren't inherently bad.... I am a firm believer that anything can be done in "moderation". The more things or experiences you have the more reference points you have, the more you can relate to people from all walks of life, making you a less judgmental person.

I also know people at school who smoke, but these people are low achievers, so I can assume that some people have a hard time preforming their best on the drug.

Yes some people do some people don't. I know plenty of people on both ends of the spectrum. Those who are low achievers tend to be people with low degrees of self-control. When you are on the drug itself some of the effects include

"altered perceptions and mood, impaired coordination, difficulty with thinking and problem solving, and disrupted learning and memory."

but it also opens you mind in a way that isn't always possible sober... Some of the most brilliant people in our history have experimented with drugs.

In the long term, it could probably cause me to experiment, and because I'm the child of a drug addict, maybe that might increase the chance of me becoming addicted.

It definitely can... only you would know if you have a tendency toward an addictive personality. If you think you do avoid it. It's not just drugs lots of people have the same problem with video games because of overstimulation.

I also wonder how that effects her orgasm , when I get to that point with girls, will she be less excited because the weed's messing her brain up, like the effects of porn on our psyche?

I don't think there is a consensus on this. I personally have enjoyed having high sex, and lasted substantially longer, but I recently had sex with a girl who told me she doesn't get as wet high.

I'm not advising you either direction... this is just what i know from my experience and someone else could come in and completely disagree... but you just have to make the best decision for YOU.

 

[Drck]

Some people have greater predisposition to becoming addicts than others. There is a lot of contributing factors to it including genetics, family influence, physical pain (eg accidents), medical problems, unresolved traumas (war, bullying, rape, death in family,...) and mental problems such as anxiety, depression, OCD or others...

So some people can start and stop relatively easily... others are not so lucky, they can't, they get addicted very fast. It can start innocently, eg with just smoking marihuana, some alcohol here and there, just for fun, just out of boredom or avoiding the pain,.. then cocaine, opiates, benzos.... You name it. He or she "wakes up" couple of years later stealing, unemployed with many lost jobs, selling her body for drugs, using needles/risking Hepatitis and HIV, getting DUIs arrests....

How do you know if she will end up like that? You really don't, only time will tell you. She might be just trying out of silliness, just playing with matches while no adult is watching, and she might turn out to be a great girl... And sure, you are young and full of energy, nothing bad can happen to you today.... But do you really want to play with addiction, risking all the problems, health and legal issues?

No you don't. Avoid. Don't be a fool, be smart. Get a life instead, become addicted to healthy lifestyle...