Should you care?

[moom]

This is hypothetical scenario and hasn’t happened to me yet. I’m curious to know how GC men would answer as I’m sure its going to be variable from person to person.

SCENARIO:
Lets say you were having sex with 2+ girls on rotation but there was one that you liked more than the rest.

With the one girl you liked more than the rest, you were doing relationshippy things with like dinners, drinks, dates, trips, etc. as well as tons of sex. But you wern’t committed to each other, although there seems to be a trajectory to an eventual relationship in place. Lets say this girl is really doting on you as well, cooking, cleaning, gifts, buying you food/drinks, etc. so you know she’s angling for a relationship hard.

QUESTION:
You’ve been seeing the girl you like the most for 3 months and she finally musters up the courage to ask “what are we.” Before you give her a definite answer, you ask her if she’s hooked up with anyone since she started seeing you. What answer would the girl have to give you in order to for you to want to DISQUALIFY her as a girlfriend?

What if she hadn’t hooked up with anyone else the entire 3 months? What if she hooked up with someone the day before? What if it was something in between that?

 

[moom]

Bump!

 

[Tim Iron]

If she wants a relationship, then most girls would never admit to having slept with any guy during the time you have been together.

 

[DoWhatWorks]

This is hypothetical scenario and hasn’t happened to me yet

With all due respect man - why are you worrying about something that hasn't happened yet? It's just mental masturbation

You’ve been seeing the girl you like the most for 3 months and she finally musters up the courage to ask “what are we.”

I would give her a vague answer and kick the can down the road for another 3 - 9 months (saying this based on experience)

you ask her if she’s hooked up with anyone since she started seeing you

I wouldn't ask her - it's none of my business. This is girl territory, she should be asking YOU these questions. Not the other way round.

if a girl is pitching to be a girlfriend she'll tell you unannounced that she's not sleeping with anyone else. (Whether it's true or not is a whole other topic)

What answer would the girl have to give you in order to for you to want to DISQUALIFY her as a girlfriend?

Again if a girl likes you, she'll say she isn't seeing anyone else. Your disqualification process should happen before this conversation not during.

From when you first meet her you're analyzing her and she's on probation (all in a non-judgmental way of course)

This is different for every guy but personally I've disqualified potential girlfriends EARLY on based on:

• Tattoos or other physical features I don't like
• Sexual or mental trauma
• Drug use
• Constant drama in her life
• Chaotic and unstable
• Whether I would feel proud introducing her to friends and/or family

By the time this girl has this conversation you should know if she's a potential girlfriend or not. Either way you'll push her out to 6 months' minimum to see if your hypothesis is correct. A safe rule is a girl is NOT girlfriend material until she proves otherwise

What if she hadn’t hooked up with anyone else the entire 3 months? What if she hooked up with someone the day before? What if it was something in between that?

She would earn herself another 3 months' minimum on probation. Obviously if she hooked up with someone else then she failed the girlfriend test which is fine, she'll just be a fun FB.



On a side note a good girl will give you very little doubt in your mind to trust her. Usually guys get themselves into terrible situations because they ignore red flags. To give you an example my old MLTR gave me the password to her mobile phone about 1 year in without me asking her.

She didn't have mine and she never asked for it.

^^^ That's the kind of behavior you're looking for. Her "proving herself" without you asking and you GRADUALLY rewarding the good behavior.

 

[Zoro]

You said was no commitment, so there should be no caring.

If you guys agree not to fuck anyone else, and someone does, that’s breaking a commitment. I would care in that case.