Should you get your shit together before learning game?

[anon9010]

Hey guys,

This is a simple question. I'm around 32 and got laid off recently. I was up and up but lost a significant amount of wealth in stocks, was laid off, and kind of let my life get stale. I guess you could say I hit a bottom. I don't feel confident as before and definitely don't have myself together right now.

I'm thinking about going 'monk mode' for about 1 year to get all my shit together and build myself back up before going out there again.

Aside from my specific situation, what is everyone's perspective on becoming successful or 'getting your shit together' before learning game? Another thing to consider is that as I'm in my 30s, girls will expect me to have my shit together.

 

[Chad Tyrone]

No excuses. You can do it all broke. Then take say an hour daily towards game and seduction if u really are gung-ho about getting to where you were before. That little effort daily will count in the long run. However, this will depend on what you want bad enough. You just can't half-ass it when it comes to improving yourself in any sphere of life. You must pay your dues and I bet one who dedicates consistent and deliberate effort/practice in the hours he puts in towards something will one day have a break.

Far better if u could learn game early, then get your shit together. It kinda humbles you in a way. OTOH, it's easy to be a bum to learn game when u are rich. Most will shag prostitutes or hire models...you also attract gold diggers especially if you don't know how to screen them out. There are still rich dudes out here willing and driven enough to learn too. So you can have your cake and it too.

Best,
Chad Tyrone.

 

[Derek da man]

I don't feel confident as before and definitely don't have myself together right now

Until you feel ready to be positive and forward looking about your position you will have difficulty presenting a positive image to others. This will be a significant barrier when it comes to being seen as attractive. You don't need to have yourself sorted as none of us ever really are, we are all just a "work-in-progress". But you do need to feel that you are in a positive position, even though you feel others could judge you differently. The important thing is how YOU feel, and how you present YOU. This is what you need to fix.

what is everyone's perspective on becoming successful or 'getting your shit together' before learning game?

As above we are all a "work-in-progress" and on a journey. If you wait until you are at your best you'll probably be long past wanting a girl any way too old to learn any kind of game. You need to get on and play the game now, and everyday, and enjoy the ride.

Another thing to consider is that as I'm in my 30s, girls will expect me to have my shit together.

Some might, but in my experience most girls are far more worried about how you will see them than the perceived reality of how you are at the moment.

You need to re-frame your own perspective of how things are and look at what you have to offer instead of money, you have humor, humility, good company, sharing life experiences especially the smaller ones like sitting on a beach watching the sun go down, or whatever. When you sort out your perspective you can then sell yourself based on that which makes you an attractive man.

 

[Will_V]

Hey guys,

This is a simple question. I'm around 32 and got laid off recently. I was up and up but lost a significant amount of wealth in stocks, was laid off, and kind of let my life get stale. I guess you could say I hit a bottom. I don't feel confident as before and definitely don't have myself together right now.

I'm thinking about going 'monk mode' for about 1 year to get all my shit together and build myself back up before going out there again.

Aside from my specific situation, what is everyone's perspective on becoming successful or 'getting your shit together' before learning game? Another thing to consider is that as I'm in my 30s, girls will expect me to have my shit together.

Well put by @Derek da man.

It's necessary to be at ease with yourself, at a minimum, to be able to seduce. Some people can do it while living miserable lives, but these are people who have spent their whole lives learning how to bury their own problems, and they've sacrificed a lot more than their feelings in the long run.

What is it that you want for yourself? Maybe it isn't wealth. Maybe it's more adventure, more personal actualization. Or something else. The closer you get to self-knowledge, the more you naturally love yourself, the less inhibition you have, and the more that women are pulled toward you. Everyone is swimming in seas of self doubt and loneliness, and the one who learns to float can offer something money could never buy.