Socializing Sleeping with women you do not like

[Chrance]

The subject of this post is:

In what way is it beneficial or detrimental to sleep with women you aren't that interested in?​

It has been a running theme these past few weeks, especially last night and last weekend, where I will chat with a woman I'm not exactly that interested in all the way to closing time and there is a clear path to a pull, but I do not take it because I do not want to have sex with her.

I know the obvious answer is simply: don't have sex with people you don't like. But I know some guys have sex with almost anything, and it could be to their benefit, a benefit that I am completely unaware of.

I'm wondering what stories or thoughts ya'll have of lays that you don't care for but maybe helped you out in some subtle or significant way, or just the opposite - lays that you had and regretted or possibly harmed you.

 

[Bismarck]

Hey Chrance,

A few pointers:

• Why are you talking to unattractive girls - is this a way for you to shield yourself from the hotter fare, to have an excuse not to have to talk to them, because you can't deal with the sexual tension with them, or because you don't believe you can smash them/they're out of your league?
• If you're going for variety, which is recommended for a young buck starting out, then when undergoing a dry spell it can help to lower one's standards a bit, smash the low-hanging fruit, and then get the sex vibe/positive momentum to then boost things forward
• The trap then can be if you don't use that positive momentum to look for something better, and to keep pushing the quality ceiling up, ending up trapped in mediocre city

 

[Tank]

From the purely skillset perspective, one should aim to sleep with girls that aren't easy but aren't impossible (for me this is 7s, I seem to be able to sleep with 6s with relative ease and 8s are universally reds or nos, and 7s are challenging I have a nonzero but low closing % with them), to hit the flow state of skill development and obtain useful feedback from results. Whether you like them or not is entirely irrelevant.

From the point of view of just happiness, that's just the comparative pleasure of sleeping with whoever you are considering sleeping with compared to anything else you could do with your time in that moment.

 

[RustinKohle]

The subject of this post is:

In what way is it beneficial or detrimental to sleep with women you aren't that interested in?​

It has been a running theme these past few weeks, especially last night and last weekend, where I will chat with a woman I'm not exactly that interested in all the way to closing time and there is a clear path to a pull, but I do not take it because I do not want to have sex with her.

I know the obvious answer is simply: don't have sex with people you don't like. But I know some guys have sex with almost anything, and it could be to their benefit, a benefit that I am completely unaware of.

I'm wondering what stories or thoughts ya'll have of lays that you don't care for but maybe helped you out in some subtle or significant way, or just the opposite - lays that you had and regretted or possibly harmed you.

See the post i made earlier today, its landed me a hotter girl on more than one occasion

 

[trashKENNUT]

In what way is it beneficial or detrimental to sleep with women you aren't that interested in?​

You keep practicing on the "wrong" people if that makes sense. There's an element of perceive because every girl you have interacted with, takes a lot of your time.

The stereotype of Thailand maids marrying white guys? That's women. All women Not just maids. It's just that men are fooled by packaging.

z@c+

 

[Chrance]

Hey Chrance,

A few pointers:

• Why are you talking to unattractive girls - is this a way for you to shield yourself from the hotter fare, to have an excuse not to have to talk to them, because you can't deal with the sexual tension with them, or because you don't believe you can smash them/they're out of your league?
• If you're going for variety, which is recommended for a young buck starting out, then when undergoing a dry spell it can help to lower one's standards a bit, smash the low-hanging fruit, and then get the sex vibe/positive momentum to then boost things forward
• The trap then can be if you don't use that positive momentum to look for something better, and to keep pushing the quality ceiling up, ending up trapped in mediocre city

Yo Bismarck

To answer your points, I usually talk to unattractive girls to give myself some momentum that night, to get my mind focused and into gear. Sometimes I will talk to them because that’s really all there is left and it’s better than nothing; or in some cases it is, as you said, so that I don’t have to talk to the hottest babes just yet, but I think the latter was more of a problem for me in the past than now.

I know on three occasions I’ve slept with women I didn’t really like and it didn’t sit right with me, so I try to avoid repeating those experiences. What triggered this post was I had an older women (40 something Asian lol that could pass as 30) who I was chatting with just for the sake of it outside of the club once it closed but rather than suggesting going somewhere else I said goodbye and left since I felt it would’ve been weird. The same thing repeated the weekend after, where I was talking to a younger woman (very thin!) who had facial features that put me off, so even though she texted and actually called me to see where I was at later that night, I passed it up because I felt it was weird. There are other instances like this going further back into July and June as well, but you get the picture.

This situation of sleeping with a woman I don’t like for momentum - it may be something I have to get my head around on my own. I feel actual disgust when thinking about sleeping with certain women.

 

[Slick]

I guess one benefit is that they might be more likely to do the really nasty shit. It also prevents you from having dry spells, which can ruin your confidence. I’d say the downside is trying to have sex with out a boner is quite difficult. I tried one time, and she walked out and never spoke to me again.

 

[Fuck This]

I'd say it works as a slump breaker or rebound. Kinda like stepping up to the Box to shoot before you step back to the 3 point line. Gets your confidence back.

I remember in college I'd just gotten dumped by a girl from the neighboring university. I don't know why but a day or two later I found my self over there at a party with some marginal quality women. My buddy and I met a couple of girls that were friends and they took us home. Mine was less attractive but I worked out some frustration that night. I wasn't as worried about my performance as I might have been otherwise. As a result I was less nervous the next time I bedded a more attractive woman.


Don't make it a habit, but a layup every now and then can get you back in the game.

 

[Rain]

This situation of sleeping with a woman I don’t like for momentum - it may be something I have to get my head around on my own. I feel actual disgust when thinking about sleeping with certain women.

It sounds like you might have answered your own question. If you've slept with this type of woman before and didn't sit right with you and sometimes a bit disgusting, maybe its not a good idea? Assuming you can do "better" of course.
You had no issues getting it up with these women? I sometimes wonder if the "can't get it up if not attracted" is not true for every man, maybe only true for some.

Also, was your mind wandering a bit during sex with these women?

 

[Water]

I've done it a bunch, it's mildly fun. Just to fuck around, and you can't mess up, you can be relaxed and you'll be surprised how little effort you can put in or how many mistakes you can make.

However, this is not a thing you should make into a habit. If you want quality hot girls, they are fundamentally different to game than ugly girls. Focus your game plan on what you want.