So I was out recently, and something interesting happened while I was making my first approach of the night. I'll admit I wasn't feeling the most confident, so thankfully the girl was easy going and playful. While I was talking to the girl at the edge of a bar dance floor, this dude comes up to us messing around, which was fine - the girl found his hat funny or something. Then he went up to me (she couldn't hear) and said "seriously, I don't think it's going to work for you with her".
I laughed and said "go on, have a good night". He persisted and said it's not going to work out, while somehow managing to act friendly. At this point I had my back turned to the girl, and he was facing me. I think turned away because I wasn't quite sure how to handle the two of them together. Anyway, I said to him "you just look after yourself buddy". He then persisted more and I think he was saying something like "me and my friends are heading off to another bar if you want to come with", acting like it was for my best interest... he must have thought I was there alone. I remember thinking "will this fool get out of my face" and then thinking "don't get angry, I should be able to handle this".
While he was talking, he went to put his hand on my shoulder. I immediately took it off, and if it wasn't for the look on his face as if to say "seriously, I've actually got something really important to say", it would've seemed like harassment. Eventually he said "did you just hear a word I said?". I said 'no'. All I was really hearing was "will you please be my protege for the night?". So then I decided to play dumb; I put my arm around him and said "hey, she's single"! He then waffled some more and I said "no! seriously dude, she's single". I then went back over to the girl, put my arm around her and beckoned him to over to us. Problem solved!
This hasn't happened to me in years. What I think myself, is if you see a guy trying to talk to a girl, and he looks like he's struggling, then do not (unless you want to get that girl yourself) interrupt what he's doing. It's easier said than done. You think he isn't aware of what he's doing wrong? Chances are he probably is, so then to have a stranger come along and tell him what he already knows, while that person gets to act like their doing you a favour, is only going to drag down your state.
It might be different if you were out with a friend you knew well, who was better with girls than you, but in general,
on a night out, there's no point in trying help someone get girl by talking logic to them. The only thing you can do, is either increase or decrease their confidence.
Please share your thoughts
I laughed and said "go on, have a good night". He persisted and said it's not going to work out, while somehow managing to act friendly. At this point I had my back turned to the girl, and he was facing me. I think turned away because I wasn't quite sure how to handle the two of them together. Anyway, I said to him "you just look after yourself buddy". He then persisted more and I think he was saying something like "me and my friends are heading off to another bar if you want to come with", acting like it was for my best interest... he must have thought I was there alone. I remember thinking "will this fool get out of my face" and then thinking "don't get angry, I should be able to handle this".
While he was talking, he went to put his hand on my shoulder. I immediately took it off, and if it wasn't for the look on his face as if to say "seriously, I've actually got something really important to say", it would've seemed like harassment. Eventually he said "did you just hear a word I said?". I said 'no'. All I was really hearing was "will you please be my protege for the night?". So then I decided to play dumb; I put my arm around him and said "hey, she's single"! He then waffled some more and I said "no! seriously dude, she's single". I then went back over to the girl, put my arm around her and beckoned him to over to us. Problem solved!
This hasn't happened to me in years. What I think myself, is if you see a guy trying to talk to a girl, and he looks like he's struggling, then do not (unless you want to get that girl yourself) interrupt what he's doing. It's easier said than done. You think he isn't aware of what he's doing wrong? Chances are he probably is, so then to have a stranger come along and tell him what he already knows, while that person gets to act like their doing you a favour, is only going to drag down your state.
It might be different if you were out with a friend you knew well, who was better with girls than you, but in general,
on a night out, there's no point in trying help someone get girl by talking logic to them. The only thing you can do, is either increase or decrease their confidence.
Please share your thoughts
