What's up dudes,
So before this semester started, I posted a very generalized Field Report regarding my freshman year of college. It was a rollercoaster ride to say the least. But I was a beginner. This is it -> viewtopic.php?f=5&t=7441.
Things to note - my freshman year of college, it was all about my OUTWARD transformation. That is, tangible results such as more attraction, more numbers, more dates, upgrade my style, my looks, the way I talk, act, behave, and all that OUTER stuff. Well it solidified my fundamentals, which is what I pretty much focused on all that year. With a solid grip on my fundamentals, I thought my sophomore year of college I was going to simply drown in a sea of pointless pussy. Which I would very dearly enjoy.
I started off with a mentality of numbers. How many lays I get, how many chicks are in my rotation, how many numbers I have and all this dumb shit to solidify my ego of 'I'm a huge fucking player'. This comes from a very fragile and insecure place, which was the foundation to this fall semester. If you're interested in the horny details, I banged more girls - hotter ones. Dated more girls, had more numbers, and all that jazz. My tangible results looked good. On paper. But that's not what this semester was about. It was all about the intangible. The inner stuff. CORE TRANSFORMATION.
I'll be honest with you. The semester was from August 1 to December 10. 5 months. And not much has changed. Which really fucking irks me. Actually, scratch that - a LOT has changed. But it's not the visible stuff. It's the smallest details about me that changed.
But see, this semester was a spiritual journey. If you look at me from the outside, not a whole lot has changed. If you look at the way I feel, not a lot has changed. If you look at the way I talk, act and behave, not much has changed. But the way I think has been dramatically fucked with. A complete 180 degree turn.
In my mind, I've transitioned from Beginner to Intermediate. Getting adjusted to a higher level of game has been an on-going battle with myself. I have congruency issues, behavioral issues, things that I used to say and do don't feel right anymore. I've began to re-adjust my way of being. The real me is beginning to come out.
And it all started with a change of thought.
But a spiritual journey is a lot harder than I thought it'd be. The first year was easy. Anyone can fucking change their outward appearance. It took nothing more than a couple visits to the mall, some social feedback and a few trips to the barbershop to completely re-vamp my look. On a very superficial level - it is EASY to change. But as you progress as a seducer, the shit gets tough. And this is where most people quit. See, I've had multiple opportunities to bag up a girlfriend and call it quits from the game. But I see much more in me than that.
I've seen nights where I'm fully in the zone, feeling rock confidence and my sexuality pouring out through my skin. I've seen what lies ahead of me, and I just want to grab it. But it takes hard work. It takes courage.
Courage to admit to myself when I'm being a pussy, to push myself past my comfort zone, to try new things, experiment, to ask myself the difficult questions. This is where I'm at gentlemen. I need to take that leap of faith. My true inner self is begging me to let him out and be free, but my beta socially conditioned self keeps fighting him in. I need to consciously push myself, to better myself, as a man and as a person. I need to reflect. Within the coming weeks I will be posting several mindset and internal shifts that occurred to me throughout the semester which completely mind-fucked me and changed my reality.
Stay tuned.
So before this semester started, I posted a very generalized Field Report regarding my freshman year of college. It was a rollercoaster ride to say the least. But I was a beginner. This is it -> viewtopic.php?f=5&t=7441.
Things to note - my freshman year of college, it was all about my OUTWARD transformation. That is, tangible results such as more attraction, more numbers, more dates, upgrade my style, my looks, the way I talk, act, behave, and all that OUTER stuff. Well it solidified my fundamentals, which is what I pretty much focused on all that year. With a solid grip on my fundamentals, I thought my sophomore year of college I was going to simply drown in a sea of pointless pussy. Which I would very dearly enjoy.
I started off with a mentality of numbers. How many lays I get, how many chicks are in my rotation, how many numbers I have and all this dumb shit to solidify my ego of 'I'm a huge fucking player'. This comes from a very fragile and insecure place, which was the foundation to this fall semester. If you're interested in the horny details, I banged more girls - hotter ones. Dated more girls, had more numbers, and all that jazz. My tangible results looked good. On paper. But that's not what this semester was about. It was all about the intangible. The inner stuff. CORE TRANSFORMATION.
I'll be honest with you. The semester was from August 1 to December 10. 5 months. And not much has changed. Which really fucking irks me. Actually, scratch that - a LOT has changed. But it's not the visible stuff. It's the smallest details about me that changed.
- My outlook towards life changed.
My goals in life changed.
My goals in seduction changed.
My reality has been re-vamped.
But see, this semester was a spiritual journey. If you look at me from the outside, not a whole lot has changed. If you look at the way I feel, not a lot has changed. If you look at the way I talk, act and behave, not much has changed. But the way I think has been dramatically fucked with. A complete 180 degree turn.
In my mind, I've transitioned from Beginner to Intermediate. Getting adjusted to a higher level of game has been an on-going battle with myself. I have congruency issues, behavioral issues, things that I used to say and do don't feel right anymore. I've began to re-adjust my way of being. The real me is beginning to come out.
And it all started with a change of thought.
- Thoughts become words
Words become Actions
Actions become Character
But a spiritual journey is a lot harder than I thought it'd be. The first year was easy. Anyone can fucking change their outward appearance. It took nothing more than a couple visits to the mall, some social feedback and a few trips to the barbershop to completely re-vamp my look. On a very superficial level - it is EASY to change. But as you progress as a seducer, the shit gets tough. And this is where most people quit. See, I've had multiple opportunities to bag up a girlfriend and call it quits from the game. But I see much more in me than that.
I've seen nights where I'm fully in the zone, feeling rock confidence and my sexuality pouring out through my skin. I've seen what lies ahead of me, and I just want to grab it. But it takes hard work. It takes courage.
Courage to admit to myself when I'm being a pussy, to push myself past my comfort zone, to try new things, experiment, to ask myself the difficult questions. This is where I'm at gentlemen. I need to take that leap of faith. My true inner self is begging me to let him out and be free, but my beta socially conditioned self keeps fighting him in. I need to consciously push myself, to better myself, as a man and as a person. I need to reflect. Within the coming weeks I will be posting several mindset and internal shifts that occurred to me throughout the semester which completely mind-fucked me and changed my reality.
Stay tuned.
