Star Trek TNG themed question on Direct Vs Indirect

[Orgasmatron]

Direct vs indirect openers.
Primarily talking day game, realise night game is probably different.

Seems to me that one of the main benefits of direct is that sexy girl gets to know that you are prepared to boldly go where no-one has gone before.

By which I mean, guys aren't generally going up and directly approaching often, so you stand out as a Starship Captain and not an un-named Ensign who is definitely getting killed on this week's upcoming away mission.

But doesn't that force Dr Beverly Crusher (my fave of the TNG babes) to make a quick decision about you based on what she knows so far? Which is very little.

So if she initially thinks you have the charisma of Lieutenant Commander Data (i.e. none) then you're not going to get very far.

Whereas, if you went indirect and don't force that quick decision, you get opportunity to demonstrate to her that you are Will Riker, the kick-ass Alpha dude who gets to show all the hot chicks on The Enterprise his photon torpedo. No?

After all, she's not a half-Betazoid mind-reading empath like Deanna Trio (Also hot, but I prefer Dr Crusher) so her first impressions are going to be quite important in determining whether she's going to want to stick around and talk to you, are they not?

Side note: I'm not planning on telling girls I like Star Trek. I suspect they'd immediately peg me as a total Wesley Crusher if I did this, even though they probably won't know who he is.

 

[Fuck This]

And yet Riker is the Segundo....Not the appointed Alpha Captain Picard is. I guess some would call him a Sigma. He can mold his approach to what the situation dictates, and not be full speed ahead all the time.

Indirect approaches is all about patience, and timing. Think about that. Set it up so she is the one who is more interested and then LET her put herself in your frame. Be diplomatic not All or Nothing.

 

[Orgasmatron]

First off, I think I've overcomplicated things with Star Trek stuff. I thought it was funny. I think I'll just stick to the point in the future. Feel I've lost people a bit with this one.

Obvious solution to the Beverly Crusher Vs Deana Troi dilemma is a threesome on the planet Risa.

I think it's starting to become clear why I'm struggling to get dates at the monument

And yet Riker is the Segundo....Not the appointed Alpha Captain Picard is. I guess some would call him a Sigma. He can mold his approach to what the situation dictates, and not be full speed ahead all the time.

Fair point. You're right. Picard is the Alpha, he tells Riker to "meet me in my ready room" and he's the one who says "make it so" and "engage." Riker's fucked all the hit chicks on the Enterprise though. Picard gets no action. I need to stop this now, sorry

Indirect approaches is all about patience, and timing. Think about that. Set it up so she is the one who is more interested and then LET her put herself in your frame. Be diplomatic not All or Nothing.

I think I'm siding with the indirect guys. I think that probably suits my personality more. I'm a pretty patient and diplomatic dude, and I think I'm good at general conversation stuff, but I do need to learn how to sexualise that and the timing stuff and everything.

I also need to learn how to read the room and realise that all my cultural references are way out of date

Don't worry dudes,. There will be no more so Star Trek stuff

 

[HumanWhoLearns]

I like the Star Trek stuff lol. I actually don't think there's that much of a difference between direct and indirect if you do it right, it's just a matter of sequencing. Whenever you deliver the line that lets her know you're attracted to her it should be casual and not a big deal - as if you're not won over just because of your looks. If you're particularly clever you can say some witty things that imply you're attracted to her which women seem to eat up. That's all good, but what you do, you don't want to try too hard or care too much because then you'll just get approach anxiety which the girl will interpret as you being low value.

 

[DarkKnight]

Picard can get laid more, he is just very serious. Like the episode where he had that forced holiday and encountered that babe.

Anyway I am more of a 7 of 9 guy

 

[HumanWhoLearns]

Deanna Troi and the Vulcan chick from Enterprise used to get me hard back in the day.

 

[Orgasmatron]

I like the Star Trek stuff lol. I actually don't think there's that much of a difference between direct and indirect if you do it right, it's just a matter of sequencing. Whenever you deliver the line that lets her know you're attracted to her it should be casual and not a big deal - as if you're not won over just because of your looks. If you're particularly clever you can say some witty things that imply you're attracted to her which women seem to eat up. That's all good, but what you do, you don't want to try too hard or care too much because then you'll just get approach anxiety which the girl will interpret as you being low value.

I think I make it too much of a big deal in my head. I simply couldn't do an approaches last weekend, out for 2 days, due to AA. Pretty annoying. Just need to do loads and get over it I think. I've challenged myself to do 100 in next 50 days, trying to not care about result.

Hopefully that should photon torpedo my AA and get me up to warp speed

 

[Orgasmatron]

Picard can get laid more, he is just very serious. Like the episode where he had that forced holiday and encountered that babe.

Anyway I am more of a 7 of 9 guy

Good choice, she could assimilate me anytime!

 

[Orgasmatron]

Deanna Troi and the Vulcan chick from Enterprise used to get me hard back in the day.

Can't disagree with any of that. Vulcan chick really rocked the uniform!

 

[DarkKnight]

Good choice, she could assimilate me anytime!

Yea dude.. resistance is futile indeed

 

[ulrich]

The thing with direct is that many guys use it as an excuse to avoid building their social skills.

If you can make a direct compliment (even a sexual comment), deliver it naturally, make it feel like it’s relevant and adapt skillfully to the girls reaction then it is as good or even better than an indirect approach.

But there are simpletons out there that talk about how girls should be down to fuck 5 seconds after meeting you (totally naive) and spam approach girls while making it awkward for everyone.

Indirect is better for learning and applying the subtleties of seduction.
Direct is better for efficiency of your time.
Just don’t fool yourself, when using an uncalibrated direct opener you’re closing the doors of an opportunity.

 

[Orgasmatron]

The thing with direct is that many guys use it as an excuse to avoid building their social skills.

If you can make a direct compliment (even a sexual comment), deliver it naturally, make it feel like it’s relevant and adapt skillfully to the girls reaction then it is as good or even better than an indirect approach.

But there are simpletons out there that talk about how girls should be down to fuck 5 seconds after meeting you (totally naive) and spam approach girls while making it awkward for everyone.

Indirect is better for learning and applying the subtleties of seduction.
Direct is better for efficiency of your time.
Just don’t fool yourself, when using an uncalibrated direct opener you’re closing the doors of an opportunity.

Thanks. I get what you're saying.

I figure my main strength is having good social skills. Once I get started I usually get good reactions, smiles, laughs, the girl seems to be enjoying talking to me, I can keep a conversation going. So, I don;t think that's a big problem for me. Obviously, I'm trying to improve this too, so I'm not saying I'm perfect and don't need to keep working on it.

An Issue I feel I have is that, being a bit older (nearly 43, fuck how did that happen? lol), if I go direct, it forces the girl to make an instant decision which, if she's like 25 or something, will probably be negative. The best interactions I've had have been from indirect when I've just started talking to her with some random comment.

Seems simple to open with "hey, I thought you were cute", or whatever, and maybe makes more sense if she's walking down the street and you approach her and want her to stop what she's currently doing. Ans it seems more natural to me to go indirect if she's just standing about or sitting on a park bench. But I'm not sure how to go about stopping her in the street with an indirect open.

 

[ulrich]

Seems simple to open with "hey, I thought you were cute", or whatever, and maybe makes more sense if she's walking down the street and you approach her and want her to stop what she's currently doing. Ans it seems more natural to me to go indirect if she's just standing about or sitting on a park bench. But I'm not sure how to go about stopping her in the street with an indirect open.

Oh yeah, definitely.

I believe it was one of Alek’s last articles (@Teevster) that talks about that.
There’s got to be a congruence between your effort to open and the directness of your opener.

Like, if you have cross a whole room or stop her at the street, it is already so obvious you’re hitting on her than anything less than “I think you’re cute” will fall flat.
That’s an important consideration for the opener.

 

[Orgasmatron]

Oh yeah, definitely.

I believe it was one of Alek’s last articles (@Teevster) that talks about that.
There’s got to be a congruence between your effort to open and the directness of your opener.

Like, if you have cross a whole room or stop her at the street, it is already so obvious you’re hitting on her than anything less than “I think you’re cute” will fall flat.
That’s an important consideration for the opener.

Cool thanks, I'll check it out.

@Regal Tiger put up a post recently saying something similar, about considering the mood of the place you're in, eg. A bar is a social place so people chat to strangers naturally so it makes more sense to go indirect, and park is not, so go direct, and if you need to interrupt her from doing something, eg walking down the street listening to headphones, you should go direct.

I thought that made a lot of sense.

So if you were in a museum or art gallery or somewhere like that it would too full on to bounce over and say "you look amazing" but would be totally to ask her what she thought about a painting or a statue and then go from there.

I'll look up the article from Alex.

Cheers