Starting at 31, any tips?

[climbingup]

Complete beginner here. Never had much success with women. I have daygame consistently for about 4/5 months in total the results are below:

I did daygame for 3 months doing on average 2 approaches a day. This was from May 2020-July 2020. This was during the first or second lockdown. I got about 4 dates from that with 4 different women and ended up banging a 35 year old russian woman. She was a 6 but a great personality.
I FORGOT:
After banging the Russian woman, the next week I was approaching and I met this 22 year old big ex student. We ended up having an instant date in the park, kissing and she ended up coming back to mine just like that. The thing is, I did not expect to pull a girl back from daygame on the same day so my crib was an absolute mess. We ended up kissing on the bed but she wasn't interested in doing more and she left.

I did daygame again for about a month in october-november this year, I was talking to about 3 girls a day and I think I went on about 3 or 4 dates with 4 different girls. I got two to come back to my crib but I wasn't able to bang any of them. These girls were all ok looking to me.

I don't have any process when I do approaches, I tend to open with a compliment on their clothes or something they are looking at and just talk about whatever I find interesting. I do most of my approaches in grocery stores.

However my total lay count at 31 is 3. Two were college students that lived in the same building that I lived in. They made it kind of easy for me and I was drunk for both of them. The other was my first and only daygame pull.

The rest of my sex has been with escorts. I'm looking to change that now once and for all. After a getting completely played by a quasi-escort, I've just had enough of that. I have a very high sex drive and I'm just super frustrated/angry about not getting laid and having to use money. I don't have much standards tbh, my only standard is 20s or 30s.

I have some free time and I just want to focus on pickup and just get good at this stuff. My routine now is wake up, shower, eat, go out and do 10 approaches and come back to continue with the rest of my day.
One thing I do love is meditation and I aim to get 8,000 hours of meditation by the time I'm 36. 4 hours a day is my goal.

Does anyone know what a beginner should focus on, I don't really even have a verbal stack or anything. I go up use an indirect/situational opener, ask them what course they are studying and just talk about whatever from there. I tease a tiny bit. The only thing I make sure to do is talk clearly, have good eye contact and try to make my conversations emotionally engaging (if that makes sense).

Is there anything I should focus on specifically as a beginner? Thanks and sorry for the long text

Also sorry, for those who have been on this journey for a while. What do you wish you knew at the beginning that would have saved you time? Thanks again

 

[James D]

Personal coaching with one of the coaches will get you on the fast track

 

[Lover]

Also sorry, for those who have been on this journey for a while. What do you wish you knew at the beginning that would have saved you time? Thanks again

Don't read anything more than what you need right now, at this very moment. Actions will get you much farther than reading or listening to podcasts.

You're not going out? Start by doing that. Complete the newbie assignment.

You're going out but not approaching? Try different openers in different situations.

Got deep psychological issues? Meeting women may be a band-aid but won't heal your wounds. Decide if you want a band-aid or healing.

In the beginning I read too much about things I didn't need and I didn't apply things. Hit rock bottom because of information overload and lack of action. Don't be that guy.

 

[climbingup]

Don't read anything more than what you need right now, at this very moment. Actions will get you much farther than reading or listening to podcasts.

You're not going out? Start by doing that. Complete the newbie assignment.

You're going out but not approaching? Try different openers in different situations.

Got deep psychological issues? Meeting women may be a band-aid but won't heal your wounds. Decide if you want a band-aid or healing.

In the beginning I read too much about things I didn't need and I didn't apply things. Hit rock bottom because of information overload and lack of action. Don't be that guy.

Thank you so much man. I went out today, right now I am eating and having a break. Then I am gonna go out again and do some more approaches before coming back home and calling it a day.

There is so much info out there, taking action is so important.

 

[ElderPrice]

Here's what I would have told myself, when I was also a beginner around your age:

1. Your #1 focus should always be on approaching women.

2. To be a beginner at that age, you probably have some weird beliefs in your mind that need fixing (In your case specifically, I noticed the part in your post about basically not having standards. That's a problem). I recommend CBT for social anxiety.

3. Probably the best tool to get started is the Newbie Assignment. It's on the boards here somewhere - find it via search.

4. Make sure you're approaching enough women before worrying about optimizing. For instance, it doesn't help you to devote all your time building a five-star wardrobe if you only approach 5 women per week.

5. It's probably going to be a long road to your true end goal, and most days you're going to feel like a failure and the voice in your head will tell you to quit. But the truth is, as long as you keep at it, you WILL be making progress. And everyone here is rooting for you and is here to help.