Openers Tell me ONE Cool thing about you

[johnydones]

Hey guys , i would like to contribute a bit instead of just writing Field reports. This is one of my favorite openers recently. It's actually something that i like to ask a girl when we are already talking if i open in some other way but it works quite good as an opener too.

If you read "How to win friends and influence people" you will understand why this is a good one, everyone thinks they are cool for this reason or that reason. And its about HER , not about how great YOU are. It also makes a good starting point for deep diving , since she will most likely tell something she values the most.

Example :
here i combine it with direct opener, you can use it on it's own

GUY: Hey , love those glasses , you look very sexy with them, im John
GIRL: Hey , im Anna
GUY: So, tell me one cool thing about you

If she says "im not cool" or "there is nothing cool about me" watch her reaction , if she looks like she is into you then you can say
"i know you are cool , you just don't know it yet"
or
"let me see your eyes ...*she rises her eyes to meet yours* , yes , i can see you are one cool girl , try to focus!"

if she says "i study physics!" (notice exclamation mark) go right ahead and deep dive the hell out of it, it's what she likes and values.

My examples might be a bit rough around the edges , i was mostly drunk when i used them , but most of the time i got positive reactions with it. Everyone likes to hear they are cool i guess. Just say it with conviction

The first time i used it , i talked to this girl for like 30 minutes and at the end she said
-you are different , most men just come and say "you are pretty" or something i heard thousand times.
She gave me her number but turned out she has a boyfriend , my friend told me afterwards.
I dont know if i should go after her or do not bother

Tell me what you think about it

-JD

 

[DesiBro]

Interesting technique. I'll field test it a bit - it sounds promising.

 

[flowerpower]

I'm not a big fan of gimmicks like these, but don't you think it works better if you ask her three cool things about her instead of just one? Lets her tell about different things, aspects, makes her think what's more important between those things, &c.

 

[Hector Papi Castillo]

I've experimented with this and it feels too much like an interview. Either cold read or amplify a thread she uses; if she doesn't invest enough for you to amplify ANY thread, she's probably not interested (obviously you should use silence and social pressure to goad her into investing if she's initially aloof).

 

[Eric]

I've experimented with this and it feels too much like an interview. Either cold read or amplify a thread she uses; if she doesn't invest enough for you to amplify ANY thread, she's probably not interested (obviously you should use silence and social pressure to goad her into investing if she's initially aloof).

I agree here with but with one caveat. There's a few exceptions here, a couple I'll keep to myself because they are dark artsy (I don't use them) and I don't feel comfortable talking about, but one I use to a lot of success is "secrets".

When you have good rapport you can get people to reveal their deepest secrets with a simple question: "What's something you HAVEN'T told me", or "What's a secret you tell NO ONE else."

This is after she feels comfortable spilling everything to you and has already told you personal details of her life that she only tells close friends. You can keep going with this one over and over. "So what's another one?". You can preface it too.. "So I ask people this question because it's a ton of fun, and I get a lot of interesting answers, and I want to ask you it.". You can get to secrets that she has NEVER told ANYONE about before. Do be careful, this causes a lot of attachment if used improperly.

 

[Mr.Rob]

Im not as experienced as Eric of Anatman but I do like to use this line occasionally and I've had it work for me.

If you use it as a means to make her want to impress you it puts social pressure on her to come up with a good answer and then wonder whether or not she answered correctly after she says it.

Also you can deep dive pretty quick and totally by pass BS small talk.

Though I don't like asking every girl I open this question for me it's more intuitively or when it pops into my mind to say after I open a girl.

-Rob

 

[Hector Papi Castillo]

When you have good rapport you can get people to reveal their deepest secrets with a simple question: "What's something you HAVEN'T told me", or "What's a secret you tell NO ONE else."

THIS. Definitely a good caveat; I have also had good experience with this. Good shit, Eric! And Rob, it definitely could force her to qualify herself, so long as she's attracted!

As for the original phrasing of the question, it's hilarious when girls use the "so tell me about yourself!" line on me. I usually laugh and tease them - "really, is this an interview?"

If she's interested (which she usually is, since she's nervous enough to invest in a very general question just to hear you talk), then this will SPIKE attraction as she fumbles to qualify herself.

If she's not interested, she might be offended. But I really don't want to hanogut with a girl who gets that easily offended. My humor is some of the darkest you'll find; if you can't handle this, you'll cry when I joke about kids with Down's Syndrome or telling someone to kill themselves.

 

[Whizzy]

When you have good rapport you can get people to reveal their deepest secrets with a simple question: "What's something you HAVEN'T told me", or "What's a secret you tell NO ONE else."

THIS. Definitely a good caveat; I have also had good experience with this. Good shit, Eric! And Rob, it definitely could force her to qualify herself, so long as she's attracted!

As for the original phrasing of the question, it's hilarious when girls use the "so tell me about yourself!" line on me. I usually laugh and tease them - "really, is this an interview?"

If she's interested (which she usually is, since she's nervous enough to invest in a very general question just to hear you talk), then this will SPIKE attraction as she fumbles to qualify herself.

If she's not interested, she might be offended. But I really don't want to hanogut with a girl who gets that easily offended. My humor is some of the darkest you'll find; if you can't handle this, you'll cry when I joke about kids with Down's Syndrome or telling someone to kill themselves.

Dear god, you and I might have the same sense of humor Anatman! I also agree with both Eric and Anatman at the same time. Both seem to keep the conversation light/laughable while continuing to learn more about the woman. Setting the whole conversation like one big secret between the two of you is something that has worked well for me so far too, building an us vs them mentality of sorts