David-
The hardest phase is that "not getting laid phase" in the beginning, yeah. A few lucky guys who already have pretty tight game or fundamentals and just need some tweaks stumble into pickup or self-improvement, and they're getting girls a few weeks later. But if you need to give yourself and your game more of an overhaul, like I did when I started out, you spend a while dragging, even if you're going out and talking to women a lot.
The most important thing during that period is having a frequently-updated list of several goals at a time you're working on. Take out a piece of paper with you that says, "Get three girls' phone numbers" or "Direct open four girls" or "Invite two women home" or "Work on screening today with five girls." Put two or three items on each paper. Then go do them. When you do this, you are actively improving your skill base in more and more places, and progressively getting closer to the place where you will pull. Eventually, your game is tight enough in enough different areas that you're able to make something happen.
When you're starting from zero, there can also be an element of luck coming into play, especially if you're getting opportunities but not seeing them or hesitating / letting escalation windows close. Sometimes when you're newer and just starting out, all you can do is keep going out and get yourself enough exposure that eventually you stumble into sleeping with girls. Once you've had a pickup or two off game, it suddenly becomes "real" to you, and consistency becomes much easier.
I know for me personally, when I was going out purely on my own, I felt fine, because I was gradually making progress, and I wasn't putting much work into it. But when I found the pickup community and started going out all the time, I got pretty emotional the first half a year or so because I was busting my tail and meeting SO MANY girls, but not getting laid. I made a huge amount of progress then too, but I couldn't see it because my goal was "get laid" and that wasn't happening. I also had at least a dozen chances to sleep with girls that I feel pretty certain now I'd have closed out on had I tried, but I didn't know what to do then and missed signs or didn't take action.
The best advice I'd have if you're struggling on a plateau is "stop worrying about getting laid." Instead, focus on chipping away at various goals in various points along the pickup process. Just up your skills and up your skills and keep pushing the boundaries, and you will push them all the way to sex at some point. And then once that happens, you just keep pushing the boundaries on your skill base, and sex happens more and more often, and gets easier and easier, and the process becomes more and more enjoyable, to boot.
Chase
