The sweetspot between neediness and indifference.

[Estate]

Hey guys,
I've been meaning to ask this for a little while. I guess an old problem I had before GC was showing too much interest. Maybe I'd get a girls number and end up having long text conversations or if she had been quiet for a while I'd ping her to get her talking.

Nowadays I pull back a lot. If I get a number I might exchange a few messages and set up a date if I can. But I notice a pattern now of the girls cooling off over time if I do this. I get the feeling that maybe I'm actually displaying some disinterest by not really being too active on texts or being in contact or whatever.

I guess it's all a balance really but how do you guys gauge what is too much and what is a enough?

 

[Light]

You will eventually know from experience, it is more like an art.
My friend had asked me the exact same question a while back, and I so I had to teach him how to "Change His Frequency".

What this means is, you need to keep a balance, by showing interest every time, but style it out that you have far more important things going on in your life. So you may text her every day perhaps, but change the times you take to reply. Change the amount of text you need to write.
Or one day you may catch her talking about something really interesting, and now you're deep diving over the phone, and that results in a long text conversation. But you don't text her again for a good 2 to 3 days. etc etc.

You need to be changing your pattern, changing your frequency. Thus showing constant interest in the girl, but not enough to for her to think "hes totally into me".

This especially works for couples already in a new relationship.

It is a valuable technique to help bring the girl back into the "Need Stage", before she hits the "Expectation Stage" of the relationship.