The "to bad you are not that big" problem

[Supah]

Or otherwise formulated as "to bad you're so small."

I'm not a very big guy, only 5’6” (167 cm) which is quite small i know. I dont really care actually, i used to, i admit but i'm way past that now.
Women do care though or that is what i make of it. The other possibility is that they just use my size as an excuse, a form of resistance towards me, especially when the girl is smaller or about the same height as me (happened to me twice this week).
This week i've heard this phrase or something similar about 4 times, last week 2 times, and i've lost count of the others.

The problem is that i don't really know how to react to this.

What i've tried so far:

-ignoring it, like she didn't mention it

-saying it doesn't matter and making a silly reference to another body part that is not small.

-just saying that it is not important.

-looking at her like the said something silly and just waving it away.

But so far this hasn't really worked out for me, after a girl told me this i lost her eventually, even if she was heavily flirting with me before.

So might there be an efficient way to deal with this or do i just have to live with it that i'm a small guy?
Or do i just need to handle it as resistance and continue doing what i was doing, maybe take a step back at first?
Or even see it as a way of telling me that she is interested in me? when a girl clearly says "to bad you are so small"?

Hope you've got some tips for me!

Cheers, Supah

 

[PrettyDecent]

Supah,

I've never faced this problem directly, since I'm rather tall, but the way to respond to these "tests" can be rather generic. Remember girls are just "silly and cute" - Them insulting means nothing really, just take it as if a small child said it to you, and they were being so cute when they said it... Oh, kids. .

You communicate that through your actions - wear a small sexy smile and think to yourself "What a silly little girl!". Verbally, say "You're very silly (pause) it's cute though. (smaller pause) So you were telling me about..." This provides a very masculine presence, as if you are her father or teacher (or a different authority position). Which, itself, is incredibly sexy.

~Nick

 

[Marty]

You communicate that through your actions - wear a small sexy smile and think to yourself "What a silly little girl!". Verbally, say "You're very silly (pause) it's cute though. (smaller pause) So you were telling me about..." This provides a very masculine presence, as if you are her father or teacher (or a different authority position). Which, itself, is incredibly sexy.

Nick:

Terrific advice for Supah, and actually I think this a beautiful way of dealing with any kind of assiness or unwarranted opposition from a woman. Great idea! Thanks!

-Marty

 

[Supah]

You communicate that through your actions - wear a small sexy smile and think to yourself "What a silly little girl!". Verbally, say "You're very silly (pause) it's cute though. (smaller pause) So you were telling me about..." This provides a very masculine presence, as if you are her father or teacher (or a different authority position). Which, itself, is incredibly sexy.

Thanks a lot, really good advice!

If the situation presents itself again i will make sure that i respond correctly now.

 

[Estate]

Good advice above but I have to say this... while whole thing of looks, especially something like height is way over-rated.

I'm 6"1'. I'm a decent looking guy, a dress well and get a lot of compliments. But there was a long time when younger that I had ZERO success with women, I was so shy and quiet and reserved.
The thing that always gets me is that guys will look at me and complain they are not getting success because they are short... they look at no other reason. So by their logic, they saw me and assumed I was swimming in pussy, but I wasn't. Height had NOTHING to do with it.

It's the same now that I am more successful. I love my friends but sometimes they bug me. My 2 good friends are both American and shorter than me. When I do well with girls they always make light of "Oh but you're a tall guy!" "Oh, girl just love your accent, we don't have that...", etc.. etc...
But no matter how much I protest there was a long time when I had ALL of that but NO success with girls... then I worked on a lot of other things which REALLY matter and now I do so well.

Height, looks, baldness, skin color, accents, weight, all those things.. they aren't a big deal.
If a guy whos 5"5' magically grew a foot taller over-night, by his logic, that solves all his problems, but he still doesn't know how to talk to women... so it won;t! He is looking in the wrong places for answers.

 

[Supah]

I'm 6"1'. I'm a decent looking guy, a dress well and get a lot of compliments. But there was a long time when younger that I had ZERO success with women, I was so shy and quiet and reserved.
The thing that always gets me is that guys will look at me and complain they are not getting success because they are short... they look at no other reason. So by their logic, they saw me and assumed I was swimming in pussy, but I wasn't. Height had NOTHING to do with it.

Thank you for this encouragement, i did kind of realise this myself but you made me realise it even better by clearly pointing this out to me.
In contrary my friends keep telling me to go for shorter girls because they don't think i stand a chance with girls who are bigger then me. Which does bug me, although I understand they are trying to guide me in the good way and trying to prevent me from being rejected. Being rejected is part of the game and it does not affect me but i guess they are just trying to be good friends.

Anyway people will always be looking for excuses, trying to make them self and others believe that this things that they have/don't have, like height, skin collor, accents,... make them unsuccessful and other successful. While they should actually focus on things that do matter like you explained above.
But I was mainly looking for a way to respond to this kind of resistance, as i didn't yet know how.

I do admit that i was still a bit in doubt, but your answer did convince me that others and my old self were wrong.

cheers, Supah

 

[Eternity]

Im 5'5. Got dressed up during the weeked, put an air of indifference on my face and walked around stores getting eyeballed from women (hot blondes for some reason) at least 2-5 inches taller than me. It was either attraction from their part or pity and amusement that men do come this size. I like to think its the former though

P.S: For some reason i have never heard the "you're too short for me" line being said to me

 

[trashKENNUT]

Supah,

ignoring it, like she didn't mention it

This is good, if you are indeed busy! Sometimes girls will say things they didn't mean. At times they will try to poke fun, which you will not be responsive because you are indeed focus.

saying it doesn't matter and making a silly reference to another body part that is not small.

i suggest to not say this. or put a little sexual humour in it.

Her: You small.
You: Nah....my penis is smaller. Give her a flirtatious smile.

You don't want to do this most of the time. It's rewarding bad behaviour. But she will definitely laugh. If she doesn't, Go kill herself. LOLX!

-just saying that it is not important.

Don't do this, It's telling her you insecure even if you aren't.

-looking at her like the said something silly and just waving it away.

Look at her like you trying to register what she's trying to say before doing about your own things again.

Hope you've got some tips for me!

All in all, there must be something you put off that cause this things, Check your body language. Sometimes Women are not interested, and that is an excuse to brush you off.

Zac

 

[Knight]

An uneducated guess - you're fairly young correct? So am I. I think the best thing to do in your case is to forget about height and focus on being a leader and getting your fundamentals down. In no time you will be more attractive than a lot of the taller guys out there!

 

[Supah]

Im 5'5. Got dressed up during the weeked, put an air of indifference on my face and walked around stores getting eyeballed from women (hot blondes for some reason) at least 2-5 inches taller than me. It was either attraction from their part or pity and amusement that men do come this size. I like to think its the former though

P.S: For some reason i have never heard the "you're too short for me" line being said to me

Well, since i have been reading girls chase and working on my fundamentals i've noticed a lot more attraction from women, so i guess i must be doing something good already. I do realise that i still have some way to go before the "you're too short for me" line will disapear out of my life. But at least i now know how to react to this. Also i know now that it does not have to be this way as you are the living proof!

So, thank you for the motivation!

This is good, if you are indeed busy! Sometimes girls will say things they didn't mean. At times they will try to poke fun, which you will not be responsive because you are indeed focus.

i suggest to not say this. or put a little sexual humour in it.

Her: You small.
You: Nah....my penis is smaller. Give her a flirtatious smile.

You don't want to do this most of the time. It's rewarding bad behaviour. But she will definitely laugh. If she doesn't, Go kill herself. LOLX!

Don't do this, It's telling her you insecure even if you aren't.

Look at her like you trying to register what she's trying to say before doing about your own things again.

Ok i'll remember this advice but i'll try to mostly use the kind of line that nick mentioned above

wear a small sexy smile and think to yourself "What a silly little girl!". Verbally, say "You're very silly (pause) it's cute though. (smaller pause) So you were telling me about..." This provides a very masculine presence, as if you are her father or teacher (or a different authority position). Which, itself, is incredibly sexy.

which does sound far better to me then the lines i used before.

All in all, there must be something you put off that cause this things, Check your body language. Sometimes Women are not interested, and that is an excuse to brush you off.

Yes, i guess you're right about that, i will make sure to review my body language if i hear that line again.

Thanks for all the great tips Zac!

An uneducated guess - you're fairly young correct? So am I. I think the best thing to do in your case is to forget about height and focus on being a leader and getting your fundamentals down. In no time you will be more attractive than a lot of the taller guys out there!

I am indeed fairly young, i just turned 20 two weeks ago. I will definitely do as you said, I never considered taller guys more attractive then me just because they were taller, but as i was getting confronted more and more with this line while getting better and better at seducing women i needed a way to handle this and thanks to you guys i now do.

So thank you all again! more tips are always welcome.

Cheers, Supah

 

[Grand Pooba]

Supah,

I've never faced this problem directly, since I'm rather tall, but the way to respond to these "tests" can be rather generic. Remember girls are just "silly and cute" - Them insulting means nothing really, just take it as if a small child said it to you, and they were being so cute when they said it... Oh, kids. .

You communicate that through your actions - wear a small sexy smile and think to yourself "What a silly little girl!". Verbally, say "You're very silly (pause) it's cute though. (smaller pause) So you were telling me about..." This provides a very masculine presence, as if you are her father or teacher (or a different authority position). Which, itself, is incredibly sexy.

~Nick

This is the right approach: she's basically shit-testing you to gauge your response and also evaluating you. I think this is further reason to really get your fundamentals into prime shape: good posture, elite eye contact, a sexy voice, powerful mannerisms, and a very masculine and self assured presence will more than make up for this physical characteristic.

I have seen many guys around your height who are great ladies men, and I think the key for them is that they do not see their height as a problem. If you are subconsciously worried about your height or feel that it is preventing you from getting the girls you want, it might affect you in interactions subconsciously. I think this is an inner issue that you have to address and become comfortable with so that if and when a girl might bring this up, rather than being defensive you think internally "what?? how silly is she!"

-saying it doesn't matter and making a silly reference to another body part that is not small.

-just saying that it is not important.

-looking at her like the said something silly and just waving it away.

These responses seem to convey to her that, subconsciously, you agree with what she said. They confirm the idea in her mind. Not what you want.

 

[LucidityComeBackToMe]

Supah

I am short myself (5'5") and have always used this as a crutch. However I have known guys my height and shorter that have had success with women. I remember Chase responded to a comment on one of his articles that the short guys he has seen that were successful tend to be ball-busters. One of the guys I know that is 5'4" seemed to have no problem getting girlfriends and making girls chase after him. He was definitely a ball-buster and would sometimes even bully taller high status men and make them look weak. I couldn't believe the gall in that guy!

Anyways I know it is really frustrating trying to find women that do not mind shorter men since both the media and women as a collective promote the idea that taller men are superior. I swear I have overheard women in bars/work/etc. saying shit like "uggh I hope no short guys approach us....ahhhh I really want a tall guy.......or yeah he is an asshole but he is tall so that makes up for it." I try to ignore it because it will make me want to shoot myself in the head. Also whatever you do don't google stuff like "do women like short guys?.. do short guys have a chance?" on the internet because it will only make you depressed.

I don't think you should limit yourself to women that are shorter than you since it is quite possible that they prefer taller men too. There are women that are between 5'0"-5'4" that still prefer their men being at least 5'9". I think it is really important here to develop the abundance mentality (even more so than the average guy) and approach all types of women and not just focus on petite ones. You may be missing out due to limiting beliefs and there are women out there that don't mind being with a guy a few inches shorter than them, but you would never know if you did not try.

I think petite women have a resistance towards short guys, because they may subconsciously think that you are approaching her because you are also short and are assuming you would have a shot with her. This puts them into resistance mode and they may think why should I get stuck with the short guy all because I am petite, I don't want to be limited and want a tall guy like my other friends! Short women can also be insecure of their height and may auto-reject because of that.

 

[Estate]

There'll always be an excuse....

You're short... girls only like tall guys.
You're bald... girls only like rock star hair.
You're <insert any race here>... girls only like <every other race>
You're skinny... girls only like ripped guys

I'm sick of it! Do you know how many guys here OBSESS that I must only be getting girls because of my accent! Yet I can't count the number of girls who DESPISE the Irish accent... but that's just THOSE girls... the rest couldn't care less. The guys obsess that "If I only had an accent... blah blah blah", yet I've had girls literally tell me flat out that they Do not like the Irish or no not like the Irish accent or stereotype me as a drunken lout because of it... but to the guys who see me get OTHER girls... oh yes, it's all about the accent.

IT DOESN'T MATTER!

If you were 6'5", it would be some other excuse...

IT DOESN'T MATTER!

Sure, some girls are tall, they don't want a shorter guy, but guess what MOST GIRLS ARE SHORT! 6ft+ women are hard to come by.
If one girl calls you on being short, that's just her. It's not all girls!

If you are not 6ft but OBSESS about getting girls who are... sure, it'll be a problem, but how many girls are that tall? I'm 6ft and I love taller women and do you know how many girls I've passed up on because I can't stand feeling like I'm her Dad because I'm towering over here?!?! And 6ft isn't even REALLY that tall. Girls aren't all tall!
But short guys will obsess that they MUST have a taller girl than them just to stroke their ego when there are perfectly good girls all around who either DON'T CARE about their height or it isn't even an issue anyway because they are shorter than the guy.

IT DOESN'T MATTER!

 

[Supah]

Supah
I don't think you should limit yourself to women that are shorter than you since it is quite possible that they prefer taller men too. There are women that are between 5'0"-5'4" that still prefer their men being at least 5'9". I think it is really important here to develop the abundance mentality (even more so than the average guy) and approach all types of women and not just focus on petite ones. You may be missing out due to limiting beliefs and there are women out there that don't mind being with a guy a few inches shorter than them, but you would never know if you did not try.

Yes the abundance mentality is very important, for every guy, but especially for those that believe that they have a factor that makes them less successful and which they cant change. Because if you have the abundance mentality you wont care any more about that thing you used to, because you have abundance.

I'm sick of it! Do you know how many guys here OBSESS that I must only be getting girls because of my accent! Yet I can't count the number of girls who DESPISE the Irish accent... but that's just THOSE girls... the rest couldn't care less. The guys obsess that "If I only had an accent... blah blah blah", yet I've had girls literally tell me flat out that they Do not like the Irish or no not like the Irish accent or stereotype me as a drunken lout because of it... but to the guys who see me get OTHER girls... oh yes, it's all about the accent.

Yes indeed, if they would follow 'irish language' classes, there success with women would not increase one tiny bit even if they would master the accent perfectly

If you were 6'5", it would be some other excuse...

yes, it would probably be something like this: i'm to tall, i cant get those cute small girls

If you are not 6ft but OBSESS about getting girls who are... sure, it'll be a problem, but how many girls are that tall? I'm 6ft and I love taller women and do you know how many girls I've passed up on because I can't stand feeling like I'm her Dad because I'm towering over here?!?! And 6ft isn't even REALLY that tall. Girls aren't all tall!
But short guys will obsess that they MUST have a taller girl than them just to stroke their ego when there are perfectly good girls all around who either DON'T CARE about their height or it isn't even an issue anyway because they are shorter than the guy.

luckily i dont have that problem though. Because thats just complicating things for yourself.

This is the right approach: she's basically shit-testing you to gauge your response and also evaluating you. I think this is further reason to really get your fundamentals into prime shape: good posture, elite eye contact, a sexy voice, powerful mannerisms, and a very masculine and self assured presence will more than make up for this physical characteristic.

I have seen many guys around your height who are great ladies men, and I think the key for them is that they do not see their height as a problem. If you are subconsciously worried about your height or feel that it is preventing you from getting the girls you want, it might affect you in interactions subconsciously. I think this is an inner issue that you have to address and become comfortable with so that if and when a girl might bring this up, rather than being defensive you think internally "what?? how silly is she!"

Yes i totaly agree with you, getting these fundamentals down is very important

The things you subconsciously think are incredibly important, abundance is one of the best examples.
All this replies made me realise that i should not care about my height at all, which helps me a lot because i will not think subconsciously 'what if she thinks i'm to small?'
Thanks a lot!

Cheers, Supah