FR Three instadates, no lays - Any feedback appreciated

[Atlas IV]

Had quite an interesting day today. Three instadates in a single day - a personal record! Unfortunately none resulted in a lay, so I feel the need to unpack exactly what happened. It's a long read, but I'd be grateful of any insights to help me figure out how I could have played this better.

Set 1
This morning, while ordering coffee at a bakery, a young HB in a bikini top gives me a strong and repeated IOI (eye contact and smile). This is highly unusual in Brazil and I am more than a little suspicious that she may have ulterior motives, but I decide to open her anyway as she walks past. I tell her that I've seen her around before and that she looks nice, then introduce myself. The interaction feels very sexually charged, as I am focusing heavily on non-verbals. We are standing close with warm eye contact and there is a lot of incidental touching. The attraction is so strong I almost feel like I could pull this girl then and there - a feeling which I probably should have translated into action.

I invite her to sit down with me. Unusually, she asks me to order a coffee for her, and I do (I think this is red flag #1). After a bit of small talk, making her giggle and blush with my intense sexual eye contact, I suggest we go to the beach in the afternoon for a caipirinha. She agrees. I get the check, walk her back to her place, and we agree to meet at 2pm. (In hindsight, I think I should have just gone for the bounce and pulled while the sexual vibe was peaked rather than risk a vibe reset by meeting again in the afternoon.)

We meet up and walk to the beach together. Unfortunately, the sexual vibe has dropped off, and things are cordial and even slightly awkward. An odd thing to note: on the way there, she greets some of the favela boys peddling cigarettes and trinkets on the streets. It seems she knows them well (red flag #2).

We reach a caipirinha stand, and I order the drinks. But here's where things get kinda weird. First, I make the mistake of choosing a vendor who also rents umbrellas and chairs out at ridiculous tourist prices. I didn't plan to rent any of these as I brought a towel and wanted to get a tan, but the girl insists. I say okay and get us an umbrella, but then she also wants chairs. The prices of these are ridiculous though (almost $10 each), and we have a back-and-forth about this, until she eventually relents and we sit on the towel.

By now the vibe is tense and silent. I try not to show my frustration at this girl who is acting so demanding and entitled. Truth be told, I've never encountered anything like this, so I am not sure how to handle it. But the cherry on top comes when she then asks to use my phone to take a selfie of herself to post on her own Instagram, as she says my camera is better. In spite of my vexation, I make conversation and try some light physical escalation by getting her to put sunscreen on me, then examining the tattoos on her hand. She does not hold or return my hand squeezes though, which I take as a sign of low compliance.

After a while, she tells she is going off to change into her bikini behind some rocky hill (also a place where drug-dealers hang out). She takes her caipirinha and purse with her, and is gone for about 30 minutes. I can't help but laugh to myself at how ridiculous this entire situation is - I am being tooled by an 18-year-old brat I just meet this morning. I have half a mind to grab my stuff and go, but then...

Set 2
A beautiful girl with a nice body comes over to sunbathe about 10 meters in front of me. I decide to hell with it, go over and open. I crouch down close and tell her that she has a very nice, relaxed vibe and I wanted to come and meet her, then introduce myself. Her response is warm and, luckily, she speaks good English. She is from another state of Brazil, recently moved to Rio for work. A very independent girl, which I point out as something that I find attractive in women. I speak slow and maintain strong eye contact, and she is hooking and investing. All positive signs so far.

Then the Set 1 girl comes back and, upon seeing me talking to Set 2, grabs her sandals and marches off. I catch up with her, but by now she is with some favela hoodlum boy (who I have a feeling she went and smoked hash with). Perhaps my instinct was right about that girl being a timewaster. Still, I wish I could have boned her somehow, she was super sexy. Perhaps I should have just pounced on the window of sexual energy and pulled fast. Guess I'll never know.

As I go back to Set 2 (who didn't notice who I was talking to), she invites me to join her on her towel, and offers me a biscuit. Quite the refreshing dynamic after my ordeal with Set 1! After some more banter peppered with incidental touching (which she returns), she asks if I want to go into the water. I say sure, and so we go in together. I try to lead her by the hand, but she pulls away. It seems she is comfortable with incidental touching, but not yet more than that. The vibe is warm though, so I figure I could probably get there with some more comfort-building.

After some time playing in the sea, we get out and go back to the towel. Some more conversation and incidental touching. I take her hand to examine her nail color. I intend to hold it and go for the squeeze test, but am interrupted by a peddler (the beaches in Rio are awful for maintaining continuity of vibe as there are pushy hustlers interrupting every 3 minutes). After a while, a Venezuelan couple who were looking after our stuff while we went to swim come over to talk, and I chat in Spanish with them for a couple of minutes. After I wrap up that conversation, the girl tells me she has to go meet up with a friend now, and suggests we exchange WhatsApp. So we do that, hug, and go our separate ways.

Unsure what I could have done differently with this one. Perhaps I should have checked her schedule for the afternoon and bounced her sooner? Or perhaps I could have persisted and asked if she wanted to grab a quick drink before meeting her friend? I'll see if I can follow up a second date with her.

In any case, by now it's mid-afternoon and there are plenty of babes still sunbathing on the beach, so I decide to do a few more cold approaches here before calling it a day. I open one absolute GODDESS Argentinian girl, who is flattered with my super sincere direct compliment, but gives me a boyfriend rejection as I try to number-close her.

Then, as I am walking along the pathway overlooking the beach, I walk past a girl with the unmistakable dark features and jet-black hair of a Colombiana...

Set 3
I open her in English, telling her she has a very unique style of dark contrasts (black clothes and jewelry) and the dark features of someone who isn't Brazilian, guessing correctly that she is from Colombia. She hooks quite quickly and I move her to the side to let people walk past. Some things about her: she is 29 years old, working remotely for a software company, travels a lot and just moved to Rio. After some conversation, I suggest we grab a drink at a nearby kiosk, and she readily agrees.

Some light incidental touching while we walk there, then we order two beers (which I lightly tease her about, since Brazilian girls almost never drink beer). We chat about travel, and I run the "strong, independent woman" gambit on her, which she likes. I turn the conversation toward dating, mentioning the challenges of having relationships when travelling. She tells me in alluding terms that she is past her "hookup phase" and now only seeks meaningful connections, though she is not looking for a relationship. But she agrees with me when I challenge her about how meaningful connections are established, telling her that many of my long term relationships began with sex on the first or second date. This seems like a positive sign.

Right now the vibe is still not sexual though. I take her hand to examine her nail colour, but she doesn't return the hand squeeze (much like Set 1 and 2). I deep dive her a little more on some other topics, fractionating with small talk. But I still don't feel like the vibe is shifting from social, and my sexual eye contact doesn't seem to have much effect.

Throughout our conversation, she brings up friends that she has in various other countries - most of whom are male. Perhaps she is so used to friendzoning guys she meets that she ignored my nonverbals without even realizing it?

Well after about 40 minutes it's starting to get dark, and she says she has to go meet her roommate. So we exchange numbers and go our separate ways.

There must be a pattern of something I'm doing wrong here though, as I could not get hand-squeeze compliance on any of the three girls today (they would let me take their hand briefly, but not hold it or return my squeeze/caress).

Is it the lack of emotional stimulation or comfort? Or perhaps I should get more micro-compliance in other ways before going for the hands - a "compliance yes-ladder"?

If you have any thoughts, please let me know!

 

[Higher]

Great stuff man!

What is the hand-squeeze thing tho? Is it a surefire way to test interest or could it be that its just distracting u?

 

[Will_V]

Had quite an interesting day today. Three instadates in a single day - a personal record! Unfortunately none resulted in a lay, so I feel the need to unpack exactly what happened. It's a long read, but I'd be grateful of any insights to help me figure out how I could have played this better.

Well done on getting these instadates! I'm sensing the thread here that you come across as 'high value' but you aren't creating a sense of connection and closeness to these girls. If I remember correctly I read somewhere here you're a tall white dude? In a place like Rio you're going to come across as clearly a foreigner, which will make girls put their guard up while wanting to keep you around - they want to be the girl that got the catch or snared the interest of the foreigner, but they don't want to be just some piece of ass you got on holiday. And that's why they readily agree to a instadate, but it's hard to make it sexual.

I think the best way to remedy this is to set frames that disqualify you in a way that also makes you interesting. The way I did this when I was in Sao Paulo was to come across as a bit of a drifter. One girl I spent some time with would tease me about how I was living out of my backpack, but this was how I dissolved the frames they had about me being someone to try and play the long game with. I also did kickboxing there which generally is something done by poorer/lower class guys, but at the same time I presented myself with style.

So I think it's mainly a case of balancing frames in the right way, where the things that disqualify you in terms of value qualify you in terms of excitement, and the things that qualify you in terms of value are as exciting as possible.

Besides that, I think maybe you're coming in too focused and not just kicking back with these girls. Tell them to show you around, suggest they cook brazilian food for you (such as brigadeiro which all Brazilian girls love), ask them to teach you portuguese words, give them a sense that you want to experience the culture and the place, and you're not just looking to rack up holiday lays. Brazilian girls are really fun to hang with like that as they are generally passionate about a lot of things and will very much enjoy playing the role of the guide who introduces you to new experiences.

Set 1
This morning, while ordering coffee at a bakery, a young HB in a bikini top gives me a strong and repeated IOI (eye contact and smile). This is highly unusual in Brazil and I am more than a little suspicious that she may have ulterior motives, but I decide to open her anyway as she walks past. I tell her that I've seen her around before and that she looks nice, then introduce myself. The interaction feels very sexually charged, as I am focusing heavily on non-verbals. We are standing close with warm eye contact and there is a lot of incidental touching. The attraction is so strong I almost feel like I could pull this girl then and there - a feeling which I probably should have translated into action.

I invite her to sit down with me. Unusually, she asks me to order a coffee for her, and I do (I think this is red flag #1). After a bit of small talk, making her giggle and blush with my intense sexual eye contact, I suggest we go to the beach in the afternoon for a caipirinha. She agrees. I get the check, walk her back to her place, and we agree to meet at 2pm. (In hindsight, I think I should have just gone for the bounce and pulled while the sexual vibe was peaked rather than risk a vibe reset by meeting again in the afternoon.)

We meet up and walk to the beach together. Unfortunately, the sexual vibe has dropped off, and things are cordial and even slightly awkward. An odd thing to note: on the way there, she greets some of the favela boys peddling cigarettes and trinkets on the streets. It seems she knows them well (red flag #2).

We reach a caipirinha stand, and I order the drinks. But here's where things get kinda weird. First, I make the mistake of choosing a vendor who also rents umbrellas and chairs out at ridiculous tourist prices. I didn't plan to rent any of these as I brought a towel and wanted to get a tan, but the girl insists. I say okay and get us an umbrella, but then she also wants chairs. The prices of these are ridiculous though (almost $10 each), and we have a back-and-forth about this, until she eventually relents and we sit on the towel.

By now the vibe is tense and silent. I try not to show my frustration at this girl who is acting so demanding and entitled. Truth be told, I've never encountered anything like this, so I am not sure how to handle it. But the cherry on top comes when she then asks to use my phone to take a selfie of herself to post on her own Instagram, as she says my camera is better. In spite of my vexation, I make conversation and try some light physical escalation by getting her to put sunscreen on me, then examining the tattoos on her hand. She does not hold or return my hand squeezes though, which I take as a sign of low compliance.

After a while, she tells she is going off to change into her bikini behind some rocky hill (also a place where drug-dealers hang out). She takes her caipirinha and purse with her, and is gone for about 30 minutes. I can't help but laugh to myself at how ridiculous this entire situation is - I am being tooled by an 18-year-old brat I just meet this morning. I have half a mind to grab my stuff and go, but then...

On the flip side, Brazil can be an awfully dangerous place, and I get the sense you were a mark right here. The way muggings often happen is via a girl like this who is very good at flipping men's switches and making them feel like something is gonna happen, and lead you somewhere you don't want to be. The only time I ever got shaken down was walking into a club because of some hotties outside who drew me in. I should have known as it was midday, but I was about to fly out and thought why not. Basically I walked in and immediately was surrounded by dudes who demanded I buy drinks at exorbitant prices, and started interrogating me in a threatening way about what I had on me. I simply told them I had no money left as I was flying out in the evening and had spent it all, which was actually true lol. I think they also could see I wasn't some rich chump and decided to let me leave. They might easily have decided to try and beat a few cents out of me anyway, or just for fun, and I was outnumbered.

With this girl, she may well have gone off to see the favela dude to discuss how and when to make the jump on you.

Take care my man! Rio is one of the most dangerous places in the world, there's robbery everywhere, and the more you stick out the more careful you have to be not to get roped into someone's scheme.

Set 2
A beautiful girl with a nice body comes over to sunbathe about 10 meters in front of me. I decide to hell with it, go over and open. I crouch down close and tell her that she has a very nice, relaxed vibe and I wanted to come and meet her, then introduce myself. Her response is warm and, luckily, she speaks good English. She is from another state of Brazil, recently moved to Rio for work. A very independent girl, which I point out as something that I find attractive in women. I speak slow and maintain strong eye contact, and she is hooking and investing. All positive signs so far.

Then the Set 1 girl comes back and, upon seeing me talking to Set 2, grabs her sandals and marches off. I catch up with her, but by now she is with some favela hoodlum boy (who I have a feeling she went and smoked hash with). Perhaps my instinct was right about that girl being a timewaster. Still, I wish I could have boned her somehow, she was super sexy. Perhaps I should have just pounced on the window of sexual energy and pulled fast. Guess I'll never know.

As I go back to Set 2 (who didn't notice who I was talking to), she invites me to join her on her towel, and offers me a biscuit. Quite the refreshing dynamic after my ordeal with Set 1! After some more banter peppered with incidental touching (which she returns), she asks if I want to go into the water. I say sure, and so we go in together. I try to lead her by the hand, but she pulls away. It seems she is comfortable with incidental touching, but not yet more than that. The vibe is warm though, so I figure I could probably get there with some more comfort-building.

After some time playing in the sea, we get out and go back to the towel. Some more conversation and incidental touching. I take her hand to examine her nail color. I intend to hold it and go for the squeeze test, but am interrupted by a peddler (the beaches in Rio are awful for maintaining continuity of vibe as there are pushy hustlers interrupting every 3 minutes). After a while, a Venezuelan couple who were looking after our stuff while we went to swim come over to talk, and I chat in Spanish with them for a couple of minutes. After I wrap up that conversation, the girl tells me she has to go meet up with a friend now, and suggests we exchange WhatsApp. So we do that, hug, and go our separate ways.

Unsure what I could have done differently with this one. Perhaps I should have checked her schedule for the afternoon and bounced her sooner? Or perhaps I could have persisted and asked if she wanted to grab a quick drink before meeting her friend? I'll see if I can follow up a second date with her.

In any case, by now it's mid-afternoon and there are plenty of babes still sunbathing on the beach, so I decide to do a few more cold approaches here before calling it a day. I open one absolute GODDESS Argentinian girl, who is flattered with my super sincere direct compliment, but gives me a boyfriend rejection as I try to number-close her.

Then, as I am walking along the pathway overlooking the beach, I walk past a girl with the unmistakable dark features and jet-black hair of a Colombiana...

Hard to say what's up here, I have the sense that maybe you were too focused on the pickup and forgot to just kick back and enjoy yourself, and she was a bit suspicious of your agenda. Maybe you were still processing the first set and was still in your head a bit. Girls are very attuned to picking up when a guy has something going on in the back of his mind.

Set 3
I open her in English, telling her she has a very unique style of dark contrasts (black clothes and jewelry) and the dark features of someone who isn't Brazilian, guessing correctly that she is from Colombia. She hooks quite quickly and I move her to the side to let people walk past. Some things about her: she is 29 years old, working remotely for a software company, travels a lot and just moved to Rio. After some conversation, I suggest we grab a drink at a nearby kiosk, and she readily agrees.

Some light incidental touching while we walk there, then we order two beers (which I lightly tease her about, since Brazilian girls almost never drink beer). We chat about travel, and I run the "strong, independent woman" gambit on her, which she likes. I turn the conversation toward dating, mentioning the challenges of having relationships when travelling. She tells me in alluding terms that she is past her "hookup phase" and now only seeks meaningful connections, though she is not looking for a relationship. But she agrees with me when I challenge her about how meaningful connections are established, telling her that many of my long term relationships began with sex on the first or second date. This seems like a positive sign.

Right now the vibe is still not sexual though. I take her hand to examine her nail colour, but she doesn't return the hand squeeze (much like Set 1 and 2). I deep dive her a little more on some other topics, fractionating with small talk. But I still don't feel like the vibe is shifting from social, and my sexual eye contact doesn't seem to have much effect.

Throughout our conversation, she brings up friends that she has in various other countries - most of whom are male. Perhaps she is so used to friendzoning guys she meets that she ignored my nonverbals without even realizing it?

Well after about 40 minutes it's starting to get dark, and she says she has to go meet her roommate. So we exchange numbers and go our separate ways.

There must be a pattern of something I'm doing wrong here though, as I could not get hand-squeeze compliance on any of the three girls today (they would let me take their hand briefly, but not hold it or return my squeeze/caress).

Is it the lack of emotional stimulation or comfort? Or perhaps I should get more micro-compliance in other ways before going for the hands - a "compliance yes-ladder"?

If you have any thoughts, please let me know!

I think this is a clear case of you coming across high value and not balancing it out with the 'disqualifying but exciting' frames as I mentioned earlier. So she was keen to spend time with you but again put her guard up to anything sexual.

The way I would deal with the common thread here is to approach these girls with the idea of 'let me find out what Brazilian girls are like, what makes them different and fun' rather than focusing on your routine.

Remember emotions are contagious, if you are kicking back and having fun while experiencing all that Brazil has to offer, and coopting these girls to lead you to new fun things, they will feel a lot more enthusiastic and open with you.

 

[Atlas IV]

@Higher

Thanks man!

The hand squeeze is something I've been reading about as a way to gauge compliance while generating sexual tension. Yeah, it could be that I'm focusing too much on it.

@Will_V

I appreciate your detailed response. I think you're right, one my problems is focusing too much on the game elements and too little on just relaxing into the set and having fun with them.

A thing to note for context regarding this, I've recently been reading an old PUA handbook called 60 Years of Challenge, which has massively overhauled the way I think about cold approach. And while it's made me a LOT better at opening and going for non-verbal escalation, I may be dialing it up too intense for day game (it was originally written for night game).

The book basically boils down the elements of seduction to:
1. There is a natural sexual tension between all men and women.
2. We are socially conditioned to break the tension when it builds in order to maintain social harmony (otherwise people would be fucking each other everywhere).
3. Your job as a seducer is simply to AVOID the things that break that tension.

This means, basically, opening lots of sets to find the girls with whom you have the best spark and weed out the timewasters, and then escalating fast with them letting the sexual tension develop naturally (using nonverbals akin to Gunwitch's SECT method). It's a "move fast and break things" philosophy, encouraging you to push things as far as possible so that you know what the resistance LOOKS like rather than just stabbing in the dark.

The way he explains it in this book is so crystal clear, and I think it's something every seducer should read. But there may be shortcomings in it that I'm blind to since I'm so immersed in it right now. A cornerstone of his method is to aim for mutual hand caressing, which is both the easiest and most difficult non-verbal to get, but which almost always leads to sex. "The hands tell everything". This is why I was focusing on them for each of the sets. However, I think it takes more comfort-building to reach that level of compliance in day game than what I was doing.

On the flip side, Brazil can be an awfully dangerous place, and I get the sense you were a mark right here. The way muggings often happen is via a girl like this who is very good at flipping men's switches and making them feel like something is gonna happen, and lead you somewhere you don't want to be. The only time I ever got shaken down was walking into a club because of some hotties outside who drew me in. I should have known as it was midday, but I was about to fly out and thought why not. Basically I walked in and immediately was surrounded by dudes who demanded I buy drinks at exorbitant prices, and started interrogating me in a threatening way about what I had on me. I simply told them I had no money left as I was flying out in the evening and had spent it all, which was actually true lol. I think they also could see I wasn't some rich chump and decided to let me leave. They might easily have decided to try and beat a few cents out of me anyway, or just for fun, and I was outnumbered.

With this girl, she may well have gone off to see the favela dude to discuss how and when to make the jump on you.

Take care my man! Rio is one of the most dangerous places in the world, there's robbery everywhere, and the more you stick out the more careful you have to be not to get roped into someone's scheme.

Damn, I think you're right. I may have actually gotten insanely lucky here. She mentioned that she likes to smoke hash, so it could be that she was planning to lure me over to the Arpeador with that guy so that they could mug me. It would explain her earlier action - asking me to buy her a coffee and being demanding about the chairs (testing if I'm willing to spend money), and asking to borrow my phone to take a selfie (to see how much it's worth). Fuck! I really need to be more careful here for the next two weeks and not let my sex drive cloud my survival instinct

I think this is a clear case of you coming across high value and not balancing it out with the 'disqualifying but exciting' frames as I mentioned earlier. So she was keen to spend time with you but again put her guard up to anything sexual.

The way I would deal with the common thread here is to approach these girls with the idea of 'let me find out what Brazilian girls are like, what makes them different and fun' rather than focusing on your routine.

Remember emotions are contagious, if you are kicking back and having fun while experiencing all that Brazil has to offer, and coopting these girls to lead you to new fun things, they will feel a lot more enthusiastic and open with you.

This makes a lot of sense. Being who I am - a tall, white foreigner, I should be remembering that I automatically set a provider frame here with the girls, and I should be disqualifying myself from that very early on, and perhaps also trying some adventurous and exciting stuff with the girls I meet.

Thanks for the useful feedback!

 

[Will_V]

This means, basically, opening lots of sets to find the girls with whom you have the best spark and weed out the timewasters, and then escalating fast with them letting the sexual tension develop naturally (using nonverbals akin to Gunwitch's SECT method). It's a "move fast and break things" philosophy, encouraging you to push things as far as possible so that you know what the resistance LOOKS like rather than just stabbing in the dark.

The way I see it daygame needs a bit of a slower pace and more social frame compared to nightgame. Nightgame everyone knows what the deal is and it's a hyper competitive sexually charged environment, where she's already warmed up. Daygame it's just a meeting between two strangers with no context, and the sexual tension has to be balanced with more of a chill social vibe, especially at the beginning, until she's warmed up.

It doesn't mean you don't get sexual quickly, but it does mean that it has to be more plausibly deniable, like she feels the sexual tension, but it also feels like a normal social interaction at the same time. She needs to be able to dip into both while she's switching gears.

 

[alexlaguma]

@Higher

Thanks man!

The hand squeeze is something I've been reading about as a way to gauge compliance while generating sexual tension. Yeah, it could be that I'm focusing too much on it.

@Will_V

I appreciate your detailed response. I think you're right, one my problems is focusing too much on the game elements and too little on just relaxing into the set and having fun with them.

A thing to note for context regarding this, I've recently been reading an old PUA handbook called 60 Years of Challenge, which has massively overhauled the way I think about cold approach. And while it's made me a LOT better at opening and going for non-verbal escalation, I may be dialing it up too intense for day game (it was originally written for night game).

The book basically boils down the elements of seduction to:
1. There is a natural sexual tension between all men and women.
2. We are socially conditioned to break the tension when it builds in order to maintain social harmony (otherwise people would be fucking each other everywhere).
3. Your job as a seducer is simply to AVOID the things that break that tension.

This means, basically, opening lots of sets to find the girls with whom you have the best spark and weed out the timewasters, and then escalating fast with them letting the sexual tension develop naturally (using nonverbals akin to Gunwitch's SECT method). It's a "move fast and break things" philosophy, encouraging you to push things as far as possible so that you know what the resistance LOOKS like rather than just stabbing in the dark.

The way he explains it in this book is so crystal clear, and I think it's something every seducer should read. But there may be shortcomings in it that I'm blind to since I'm so immersed in it right now. A cornerstone of his method is to aim for mutual hand caressing, which is both the easiest and most difficult non-verbal to get, but which almost always leads to sex. "The hands tell everything". This is why I was focusing on them for each of the sets. However, I think it takes more comfort-building to reach that level of compliance in day game than what I was doing.


Damn, I think you're right. I may have actually gotten insanely lucky here. She mentioned that she likes to smoke hash, so it could be that she was planning to lure me over to the Arpeador with that guy so that they could mug me. It would explain her earlier action - asking me to buy her a coffee and being demanding about the chairs (testing if I'm willing to spend money), and asking to borrow my phone to take a selfie (to see how much it's worth). Fuck! I really need to be more careful here for the next two weeks and not let my sex drive cloud my survival instinct



This makes a lot of sense. Being who I am - a tall, white foreigner, I should be remembering that I automatically set a provider frame here with the girls, and I should be disqualifying myself from that very early on, and perhaps also trying some adventurous and exciting stuff with the girls I meet.

Thanks for the useful feedback!

Hey bro. Really interesting field report. I think @Will_V gave you some great advice, particularly about emotions being contagious. Its hard to explain but the best dates for me are the ones where I just 'know' that the girl is into me, and then I just relax and I run my natural game without thinking about it. If I could get that feeling on every date I would be unstoppable!

You raise an interesting point about 60 years of challenge, and its something I have been thinking about. 6yoc is the best game / pickup advice I have personally ever read ... it was incredibly effective for me when I first read it, and it taught me to scrap most tactics/techniques and to just try to escalate and get physical and be persistent. But ... when I tried to apply it to dating ... as in trying to apply those tactics to a first date, it didn't seem to work as well. I think, as you say, the book was written really about night game approaches. I remember when I first started using dating apps a few years ago, I would meet a girl for the first time and try to do this 60 years of challenge stuff and it just felt a bit weird. I was trying to escalate / make deep eye contact / be sexual when I had literally just met the girl off an app for the first time, and it felt a little incongruent.

So I think you are right, a lot of the 60 stuff is more applicable to night game where it feels more congruent to be pushing / escalating.

Anyway - interested in your journey. Sounds like you are doing great.

 

[Atlas IV]

Hey bro. Really interesting field report. I think @Will_V gave you some great advice, particularly about emotions being contagious. Its hard to explain but the best dates for me are the ones where I just 'know' that the girl is into me, and then I just relax and I run my natural game without thinking about it. If I could get that feeling on every date I would be unstoppable!

You raise an interesting point about 60 years of challenge, and its something I have been thinking about. 6yoc is the best game / pickup advice I have personally ever read ... it was incredibly effective for me when I first read it, and it taught me to scrap most tactics/techniques and to just try to escalate and get physical and be persistent. But ... when I tried to apply it to dating ... as in trying to apply those tactics to a first date, it didn't seem to work as well. I think, as you say, the book was written really about night game approaches. I remember when I first started using dating apps a few years ago, I would meet a girl for the first time and try to do this 60 years of challenge stuff and it just felt a bit weird. I was trying to escalate / make deep eye contact / be sexual when I had literally just met the girl off an app for the first time, and it felt a little incongruent.

So I think you are right, a lot of the 60 stuff is more applicable to night game where it feels more congruent to be pushing / escalating.

Anyway - interested in your journey. Sounds like you are doing great.

Hey man, cool to hear from someone else who knows about 60 Years of Challenge. I think I might make a separate post about it just so that others can discover it too.

I only came across it by chance the other week as I found a lay report from 8 years ago by a guy who used this system and racked up 11 lays in 40 days while travelling Latin America, which is pretty insane. So I started reading it for myself and it blew my mind. It boils down the elements of seduction in a way that I've never seen explained before, and reminded me of the epiphanies I got when I first discovered GirlsChase.

But yeah, this rapid, aggressive "burn the bridges" style of physical escalation is definitely more suited to night game than day game, and is probably overkill for dates. Though I'll say that the "weeding out timewasters to find the girls you click with" mental framework has really motivated me to do more approaches in all situations. I'm only halfway through the book but when I finish it I'll write up a summary for the forum so everyone can discuss it.

Cheers for the comment!

 

[Marty]

Set 2
A beautiful girl with a nice body comes over to sunbathe about 10 meters in front of me. I decide to hell with it, go over and open. I crouch down close and tell her that she has a very nice, relaxed vibe and I wanted to come and meet her, then introduce myself. Her response is warm and, luckily, she speaks good English. She is from another state of Brazil, recently moved to Rio for work. A very independent girl, which I point out as something that I find attractive in women. I speak slow and maintain strong eye contact, and she is hooking and investing. All positive signs so far.
…

As I go back to Set 2 (who didn't notice who I was talking to), she invites me to join her on her towel, and offers me a biscuit. Quite the refreshing dynamic after my ordeal with Set 1! After some more banter peppered with incidental touching (which she returns), she asks if I want to go into the water. I say sure, and so we go in together. I try to lead her by the hand, but she pulls away. It seems she is comfortable with incidental touching, but not yet more than that. The vibe is warm though, so I figure I could probably get there with some more comfort-building.

After some time playing in the sea, we get out and go back to the towel. Some more conversation and incidental touching. I take her hand to examine her nail color. I intend to hold it and go for the squeeze test, but am interrupted by a peddler (the beaches in Rio are awful for maintaining continuity of vibe as there are pushy hustlers interrupting every 3 minutes). After a while, a Venezuelan couple who were looking after our stuff while we went to swim come over to talk, and I chat in Spanish with them for a couple of minutes. After I wrap up that conversation, the girl tells me she has to go meet up with a friend now, and suggests we exchange WhatsApp. So we do that, hug, and go our separate ways.

I love the smoothness and natural warmth of this interaction. This sounds as if it could be a promising lead.

 

[alexlaguma]

Hey man, cool to hear from someone else who knows about 60 Years of Challenge. I think I might make a separate post about it just so that others can discover it too.

I only came across it by chance the other week as I found a lay report from 8 years ago by a guy who used this system and racked up 11 lays in 40 days while travelling Latin America, which is pretty insane. So I started reading it for myself and it blew my mind. It boils down the elements of seduction in a way that I've never seen explained before, and reminded me of the epiphanies I got when I first discovered GirlsChase.

But yeah, this rapid, aggressive "burn the bridges" style of physical escalation is definitely more suited to night game than day game, and is probably overkill for dates. Though I'll say that the "weeding out timewasters to find the girls you click with" mental framework has really motivated me to do more approaches in all situations. I'm only halfway through the book but when I finish it I'll write up a summary for the forum so everyone can discuss it.

Cheers for the comment!

Yeh definitely. It was a bit of a game-changer for me when I read it initially. I think previously I was into the old school Style / Mystery Method stuff ... and 6yoc made me realise that you don't really need any of that. You need to do the approaches, find girls that are at least luke-warm to your approach, and just escalate from there. Definitely simplified my game and helped a lot.

If you do a write up I'll definitely give it a read, its been a while since I read his stuff.