I didn't feel like going out yesterday night (especially to a nightclub/bar) but I force myself to do so and it really paid. I searched for any party at any friend's place I could go. There was a BBQ and I thought it would be perfect.
At first, I went out just to do it. When I arrived I asked for the friend I knew to some guys there. I say hello. A guy I know joined me an we talk for a little while. Then I proceed to say hello to everyone (we were really close, so not too much work).
I'm going to tell the experience I had with the girl (which I had met her once before) on which the whole process went down (of course, I did some things of this process with others: when this girls was not near, when she moved away, etc.).
I was really chilled when I say hi to everyone, even to this girl, of course. Then I focus my attention on some random guy within a group and started to listen to the conversation. Then I never said a thing. I just listened, listened and listened (great to do. You start to see the points of view of persons, their beliefs, and how strong they believe them, etc.). Just think that when you talk it should be important.
This girl started coming closer and closer. At this point I had never tried to get her attention. When she was next to me it started. First, I started focusing on her for a while, to let her know I was listening now exclusively to her. Never talk for a while. If I found something worth noting I would say something. Then I will shift again my attention to other person. I'm not sure if she or I started the first touch (not relevant, really). Once it started I just keep mirroring her. We started with our foot. Little nudges. Eventually our feet stay touching all the time. Next step was some leg touching. More intensity in each time until we were touching all the time. After a while she had the side of her body touching the side of mine, almost leaning back. In this moment I started brushing. You can do it with your legs if you feel comfortable doing so. Just start whenever you feel comfortable doing it (I guess the easier time is when she is kinda leaning back to you. It's very natural to move your waist back and forth or side to side to brush against her). After this I already had my hand near her ass so I just started gently touching her. She would move a little forward, then she will get back to feel my hand. When she got comfortable with my hand she started leaning harder on it so she felt more. You can start adding the intensity yourself, but be very careful with the intensity. I started brushing the same way you do it with other parts. The most touching I got was my hand really rubbing her softly near her lower part of her ass, not really quite on her pussy, but close.
This whole escalation didn't happened at once. She left three to four times before. I wanted to give the full escalation, not broken on different moments.
The first time she left (maybe the first time I was rubbing very softly one of her ass' cheeks), she sat at the couch. I started a pretty special escalation that is used when you are not together (visual non-verbal escalation). First, I didn't react to this (she leaving). I just kept paying attention to whatever I had all the time. After a while I moved my body to a position where I could looked at her direction in a natural and comfortable way. I started looking at her feet. With my peripherals I could see she was trying to make eye contact, she kept looking. There is no feedback like when you are touching. She doesn't touches you back. But you know when you can escalate. She starts flirting with her body, the part you are seeing, posing, moving, she starts feeling you, and the you up the notch. So I just started looking to more intimate body parts. I started focusing on her legs. She started getting excited (remember to pay special attention to her non-verbals). Eventually I was looking at her hairline. I never ended up looking at her eyes. Eventually, I think I broke the whole escalation and went to pay attention to one guy at the conversation I was.
She got closer. She joined the whole group. And after a while (do not react to her actions, remember) I started the same visual non-verbal escalation. I have to say, I started to get so fucking horny. And remember, if you feel this she is feeling it. This is not horny like you see a hot girl and know you want to fuck her. This was really getting horny little by little. It was so hot. Just looking at her feet, then her legs, each time I took in each body part made me hornier and hornier. When I was at her crotch I was starting to get a boner already. I kinda move very gently my crotch towards her and she mirror that. It was amazing. I was so fucking hot. After a while she stopped it. Fucked, it hurt. But I kept looking at the same place, not reaction to her actions immediately. Then I focus my attention on someone.
The great thing is that when she gets, again, next to you, the escalation is faster, of course. We didn't need to start from square one. You just start with one or two steps back from the last touch you did to be safer. Unless it was a more hardcore touch like rubbing her ass. Then you will have to start with any touch that is not obvious to the people there and that is comfortable to her. You will know what she wants because she will touch you in the way she feels comfortable at that moment. You know you can escalate quicker now.
When the party was over and everyone was already gone I had to try to stay at her house. So I told her if she had room for one more (she was hosting two guys I know that had came to the country the day before) and she said she had no more couches because some girlfriend were staying too. I didn't say a thing. So her previous decline was not acknowledge by me. So she started to come around.
"I don't want my father to see to many people".
"Can't you get to your home? What if I get you a ride to the bus stop" (in this one I just said something like I didn't know it was the best idea. It was already late, cold)
"Okay, let me see what we can do"
Then she told me I could stay and she would give me a blanket. I was in the living room and the guys I knew where outside. One of them, I knew, had already had sex with her because a friend of mine told me. After a while he came in, I looked at him, give him a small smile and continue focusing on whatever I was looking (I think it was some glass art).
This is when the voyeurism thing happen. I was so focus in something that, if anyone has already done this, my listening was great. I could hear them talking very low. They started to get hot and heavy. They where at the entrance of the room, they could see me. I never looked directly. I can swear I heard someone say "close the door", but they didn't. After a while I turned around looking in their direction but with my eyes closed (like resting the eyes, like when you are tired). I sat down in a couch that faced the room but they had already moved in. They started fucking (yes, I'm pretty sure). They some times stopped because there were some footsteps (maybe her father upstairs, a girlfriend, don't know). After maybe 5 minutes she came back and told me "we are going to leave you at your place". I was pretty glad about it. I knew I could not fuck her at her place when the guy is fucking staying there.
We left with the car. She started talking to me. I kept my answer short, not trying to say to much (Law of Least Effort, as usual). I still did visual non-verbal escalation looking at her hair, whatever. When we arrived to my place she didn't make eye contact when I got out. But I still had to open the trunk of this hatchback to get my guitar, I knew she would look, I was pretty sure. When I took my guitar I lowered my eyes to see if she was looking, waiting for my eyes. She was. I said goodbye and we didn't break eye contact. Then I close the trunk.
Well, I'm sure she has fucked like crazy . He won't know but she was so fucking horny because of all this.
I have to say this was a pretty mind blowing experience. I had already experience with touching but I had never been able to escalate like this because I didn't know what to do after my hand was brushing her ass. No I know I should just give her more, my crotch for example. Baby steps at a time, of course. This is perfect for dance floor for sure where escalation is way more aggresive.
Other great thing is not talking. You'll see how others are. You will catch so much bullshit. Like guys saying one thing about something, then you ask why and they explain it. And they might be talking bullshit or not. You will catch so many guys and girls that just trying to fit it, be accepted. It's sad why people care so much about what other people think about them that they put some facade.
I have to clarify that sometimes I talked. Of course. When there was a moment I really wanted to know something or make a point I talked. Also, sometimes I talked to this girl. Almost always when she was near me, so it could be more like a conversation between her and me.
It's been a long post but I'm sure worth it.
Cheers!
PS: I've posted this non-verbal touching and visual non-verbal escalation on the Tactics & Techniques board.
At first, I went out just to do it. When I arrived I asked for the friend I knew to some guys there. I say hello. A guy I know joined me an we talk for a little while. Then I proceed to say hello to everyone (we were really close, so not too much work).
I'm going to tell the experience I had with the girl (which I had met her once before) on which the whole process went down (of course, I did some things of this process with others: when this girls was not near, when she moved away, etc.).
I was really chilled when I say hi to everyone, even to this girl, of course. Then I focus my attention on some random guy within a group and started to listen to the conversation. Then I never said a thing. I just listened, listened and listened (great to do. You start to see the points of view of persons, their beliefs, and how strong they believe them, etc.). Just think that when you talk it should be important.
This girl started coming closer and closer. At this point I had never tried to get her attention. When she was next to me it started. First, I started focusing on her for a while, to let her know I was listening now exclusively to her. Never talk for a while. If I found something worth noting I would say something. Then I will shift again my attention to other person. I'm not sure if she or I started the first touch (not relevant, really). Once it started I just keep mirroring her. We started with our foot. Little nudges. Eventually our feet stay touching all the time. Next step was some leg touching. More intensity in each time until we were touching all the time. After a while she had the side of her body touching the side of mine, almost leaning back. In this moment I started brushing. You can do it with your legs if you feel comfortable doing so. Just start whenever you feel comfortable doing it (I guess the easier time is when she is kinda leaning back to you. It's very natural to move your waist back and forth or side to side to brush against her). After this I already had my hand near her ass so I just started gently touching her. She would move a little forward, then she will get back to feel my hand. When she got comfortable with my hand she started leaning harder on it so she felt more. You can start adding the intensity yourself, but be very careful with the intensity. I started brushing the same way you do it with other parts. The most touching I got was my hand really rubbing her softly near her lower part of her ass, not really quite on her pussy, but close.
This whole escalation didn't happened at once. She left three to four times before. I wanted to give the full escalation, not broken on different moments.
The first time she left (maybe the first time I was rubbing very softly one of her ass' cheeks), she sat at the couch. I started a pretty special escalation that is used when you are not together (visual non-verbal escalation). First, I didn't react to this (she leaving). I just kept paying attention to whatever I had all the time. After a while I moved my body to a position where I could looked at her direction in a natural and comfortable way. I started looking at her feet. With my peripherals I could see she was trying to make eye contact, she kept looking. There is no feedback like when you are touching. She doesn't touches you back. But you know when you can escalate. She starts flirting with her body, the part you are seeing, posing, moving, she starts feeling you, and the you up the notch. So I just started looking to more intimate body parts. I started focusing on her legs. She started getting excited (remember to pay special attention to her non-verbals). Eventually I was looking at her hairline. I never ended up looking at her eyes. Eventually, I think I broke the whole escalation and went to pay attention to one guy at the conversation I was.
She got closer. She joined the whole group. And after a while (do not react to her actions, remember) I started the same visual non-verbal escalation. I have to say, I started to get so fucking horny. And remember, if you feel this she is feeling it. This is not horny like you see a hot girl and know you want to fuck her. This was really getting horny little by little. It was so hot. Just looking at her feet, then her legs, each time I took in each body part made me hornier and hornier. When I was at her crotch I was starting to get a boner already. I kinda move very gently my crotch towards her and she mirror that. It was amazing. I was so fucking hot. After a while she stopped it. Fucked, it hurt. But I kept looking at the same place, not reaction to her actions immediately. Then I focus my attention on someone.
The great thing is that when she gets, again, next to you, the escalation is faster, of course. We didn't need to start from square one. You just start with one or two steps back from the last touch you did to be safer. Unless it was a more hardcore touch like rubbing her ass. Then you will have to start with any touch that is not obvious to the people there and that is comfortable to her. You will know what she wants because she will touch you in the way she feels comfortable at that moment. You know you can escalate quicker now.
When the party was over and everyone was already gone I had to try to stay at her house. So I told her if she had room for one more (she was hosting two guys I know that had came to the country the day before) and she said she had no more couches because some girlfriend were staying too. I didn't say a thing. So her previous decline was not acknowledge by me. So she started to come around.
"I don't want my father to see to many people".
"Can't you get to your home? What if I get you a ride to the bus stop" (in this one I just said something like I didn't know it was the best idea. It was already late, cold)
"Okay, let me see what we can do"
Then she told me I could stay and she would give me a blanket. I was in the living room and the guys I knew where outside. One of them, I knew, had already had sex with her because a friend of mine told me. After a while he came in, I looked at him, give him a small smile and continue focusing on whatever I was looking (I think it was some glass art).
This is when the voyeurism thing happen. I was so focus in something that, if anyone has already done this, my listening was great. I could hear them talking very low. They started to get hot and heavy. They where at the entrance of the room, they could see me. I never looked directly. I can swear I heard someone say "close the door", but they didn't. After a while I turned around looking in their direction but with my eyes closed (like resting the eyes, like when you are tired). I sat down in a couch that faced the room but they had already moved in. They started fucking (yes, I'm pretty sure). They some times stopped because there were some footsteps (maybe her father upstairs, a girlfriend, don't know). After maybe 5 minutes she came back and told me "we are going to leave you at your place". I was pretty glad about it. I knew I could not fuck her at her place when the guy is fucking staying there.
We left with the car. She started talking to me. I kept my answer short, not trying to say to much (Law of Least Effort, as usual). I still did visual non-verbal escalation looking at her hair, whatever. When we arrived to my place she didn't make eye contact when I got out. But I still had to open the trunk of this hatchback to get my guitar, I knew she would look, I was pretty sure. When I took my guitar I lowered my eyes to see if she was looking, waiting for my eyes. She was. I said goodbye and we didn't break eye contact. Then I close the trunk.
Well, I'm sure she has fucked like crazy . He won't know but she was so fucking horny because of all this.
I have to say this was a pretty mind blowing experience. I had already experience with touching but I had never been able to escalate like this because I didn't know what to do after my hand was brushing her ass. No I know I should just give her more, my crotch for example. Baby steps at a time, of course. This is perfect for dance floor for sure where escalation is way more aggresive.
Other great thing is not talking. You'll see how others are. You will catch so much bullshit. Like guys saying one thing about something, then you ask why and they explain it. And they might be talking bullshit or not. You will catch so many guys and girls that just trying to fit it, be accepted. It's sad why people care so much about what other people think about them that they put some facade.
I have to clarify that sometimes I talked. Of course. When there was a moment I really wanted to know something or make a point I talked. Also, sometimes I talked to this girl. Almost always when she was near me, so it could be more like a conversation between her and me.
It's been a long post but I'm sure worth it.
Cheers!
PS: I've posted this non-verbal touching and visual non-verbal escalation on the Tactics & Techniques board.
