- Joined
- Jan 26, 2013
- Messages
- 707
So short-term screening for a hookup is fairly straightforward. Even if she's a freak there's isn't much risk here. Who gives a fuck if she likes food you don't like? I just want to fuck her.
But I always run into this problem once things start to transition to something more serious (i.e. casual relationship) and the stakes are higher: she changes her mind/views after I had screened for her tastes/personality months prior so I felt it was OK to keep seeing her.
They are nearly always something idiotic, taste-related, but this is so closely related to personality that I find it irritatingly amusing.
Freshest "case in point" in history: girl makes fun of hipsters, girly-like guys, Justin Bieber ("ew") and the sorts. Several months later, Bieber's new single, which is highly appealing to women feelings, is out and she says "I liked it, he's getting better."
Or: girl doesn't like tattoos then months after wants one. Or girl hate sushi and months after love it.
Now, I'm all out for positive change. Heck, I embrace it, we're here for it. But I don't want to deal with it after I screened for it and invested a whole lot more than I would otherwise.
I simply don't want her to like or do XYZ because I don't want to deal with shit I'm not interested and that was not what I signed up for. I don't wanna have to turn down listening to shitty music when she's around or deal with her insistence to go to restaurants with foods I don't like all the time. Also, they represent minor personality changes.
I know it's impossible for people not to change over time, but thing is, how do you react when you first notice this is starting to happen and it's something you deem undesirable? These are relatively minor issues, so any kind of reaction here would be considered overreacting. In fact, that was exactly what I did in Bieber's case above because I was so motherfucking pissed with this shit that I wanted to show clear signs of dissatisfaction.
Not because of shitty music, but because of "changing mind constantly after passing screening tests."
Now that I cooled down I realize it isn't the greatest idea to react like that because:
So after I made (quite) obvious that I simply didn't share the same interest she did in that song, she obviously got defensive and tried to get back at me saying "what, couldn't she share something she liked with me anymore?" and that "like, people have different tastes, deal with it."
From a seduction standpoint I can calmly ignore her tastes and whatever and turn it into a banter which will help me fuck her later on. It's just that when it's past that stage that I don't know how to handle it. I certainly shouldn't be bantering with her over the same things over and over and over again. (Should I?)
I get this will always happen from time to time as it's also a shit test, but my question is:
Just like ignoring it/establishing chase framing with shit you have no interest into during seduction is a reaction that helps you accomplish your goals, what's the proper way to react to it when we're talking about a longer-term thing?
But I always run into this problem once things start to transition to something more serious (i.e. casual relationship) and the stakes are higher: she changes her mind/views after I had screened for her tastes/personality months prior so I felt it was OK to keep seeing her.
They are nearly always something idiotic, taste-related, but this is so closely related to personality that I find it irritatingly amusing.
Freshest "case in point" in history: girl makes fun of hipsters, girly-like guys, Justin Bieber ("ew") and the sorts. Several months later, Bieber's new single, which is highly appealing to women feelings, is out and she says "I liked it, he's getting better."
Or: girl doesn't like tattoos then months after wants one. Or girl hate sushi and months after love it.
Now, I'm all out for positive change. Heck, I embrace it, we're here for it. But I don't want to deal with it after I screened for it and invested a whole lot more than I would otherwise.
I simply don't want her to like or do XYZ because I don't want to deal with shit I'm not interested and that was not what I signed up for. I don't wanna have to turn down listening to shitty music when she's around or deal with her insistence to go to restaurants with foods I don't like all the time. Also, they represent minor personality changes.
I know it's impossible for people not to change over time, but thing is, how do you react when you first notice this is starting to happen and it's something you deem undesirable? These are relatively minor issues, so any kind of reaction here would be considered overreacting. In fact, that was exactly what I did in Bieber's case above because I was so motherfucking pissed with this shit that I wanted to show clear signs of dissatisfaction.
Not because of shitty music, but because of "changing mind constantly after passing screening tests."
Now that I cooled down I realize it isn't the greatest idea to react like that because:
- - It strains the relationship over time, creates drama, etc
- It's just plain overreacting/needy
- It creates a barrier between us that makes her ask herself if it's OK to share thinks with me. I get it... she likes me, she wants to share with me... but I don't want her to like this because well, it isn't interesting.
So after I made (quite) obvious that I simply didn't share the same interest she did in that song, she obviously got defensive and tried to get back at me saying "what, couldn't she share something she liked with me anymore?" and that "like, people have different tastes, deal with it."
From a seduction standpoint I can calmly ignore her tastes and whatever and turn it into a banter which will help me fuck her later on. It's just that when it's past that stage that I don't know how to handle it. I certainly shouldn't be bantering with her over the same things over and over and over again. (Should I?)
I get this will always happen from time to time as it's also a shit test, but my question is:
Just like ignoring it/establishing chase framing with shit you have no interest into during seduction is a reaction that helps you accomplish your goals, what's the proper way to react to it when we're talking about a longer-term thing?
