- Joined
- Sep 24, 2014
- Messages
- 5
Going to try to explain this as succinctly as possible though I'll likely find that difficult. Thanks in advance for any advice...
About a month ago I hooked up with this 24 year old girl (9) for the first time (I'm 31). It was a very odd situation in that I met her via a mutual friend at about 3am on a Thursday night just before she was about to fly from San Diego to Cancun to go party at a music festival for 10 days and after hanging out for about 45 minutes she happened to ask me if I wanted to go and stay with her and her friend. After some deliberating I agreed and bought a plane ticket about an hour later.
I arrived in Cancun and met this girl and her friend at the airport then proceeded to go to the apartment she had rented. I didn't have to pay for anything.
We ended up spending about 2 hours in each other's presence most of which she completely ignored me and I played it very cool basically acting like I didn't give a shit and was just there for fun. She actually ditched me while we were out partying in Cancun and I went back to our apartment to sleep, only to be woken up by her a couple hours later and ended up fucking her. It was maybe the easiest lay I ever had. She woke me up, I just did everything natural putting on a movie and suggesting her to move onto the bed with me, then beginning with light touching and we were fucking like 5 minutes later.
Cutting out a huge part of the story, I left Cancun early because the girl literally had a schizophrenic episode. I hadn't seen her in about a month since then. We spoke on instant messenger a few brief times in between then and just tonight.
Tonight she comes over with her friend I went to Cancun with and our mutual friend that introduced us. At first she did her usual thing of ignoring me and acting pretty disrespectful/rude in general. I made it clear I wouldn't put up with her bullshit but maybe I didn't press hard enough. She made a comment at one point that she would leave and I said fine, but she didn't.
Anyways, 45 minutes or so passes by and she seems to be warming up to me again slightly. I do some light touching in her erogenous areas and try to slowly escalate in a smooth manner like I did the first time around. She isn't rejecting any of my touches but isn't reciprocating either. Some more time goes by and I finally get some alone time with her as my friend and his girl went outside to smoke. She is sitting in my computer chair and I am sitting on the bed. She goes on and on multiple times about her issues with her Spanish class and how she needs a tutor. She was strongly hinting to me that she wanted me to tutor her in Spanish but I had no interest in that at all so I kept ignoring her comments about it. She definitely was giving me a chance to seal the deal because we ended up talking in my bedroom just her and I for at least half an hour. At one point when it seemed natural, I went to grab her hand and she pulled away. She brought something up about Spanish translation and I told her to type it into the laptop computer which was on the bed next to me. She leaned over me and typed in whatever she was trying to type while I put my arm around her waste. She seemed slightly receptive of this at first but I didn't push at this point to make any kind of bold move because the first time we hooked up I didn't need to make any bold moves and it just happened more organically.
She eventually moved away from the bed and stopped leaning over me....then started mentioning something about some other dude she was staying with. I ignored this completely. I made a couple more attempts to try to get her back over to typing stuff into the laptop so I could be closer to her and the more I did that the less receptive she seemed to be as time went on. I can only guess that the first time she did this was my window and I missed it. Eventually too much time passed and she became more obviously frigid towards me.
My question is, what is my issue? This happens to me quite a bit where I feel like the girl is into me (why else is she blabbering on about bullshit for so long sitting in my bedroom at like 3am?) yet actively dismisses my under the radar type moves to establish a physical rapport. This has happened to me quite a few times with multiple different girls in similar situations.
I've previously tried many times in these types of situations to just go for the bold move and try to start making out with them but have been rejected every single time I've done that. I have had some success with the under the radar type moves but clearly I'm writing this post because I don't succeed consistently from it.
What am I doing wrong? I hooked up with this girl already previously and now she's in my bedroom (drunk and high on blow at 3am on a Monday) yet I am not able to seal the deal. I attempted escalating the vibe by giving her bedroom eyes. I altered between leaning in to her to get closer for touching and leaning away to get her to think she's losing me (though I struggle to understand how and when these moves are effective). The only thing I didn't do was make a bold physical move like just pull her to the bed and start making out with her. I feel like there's something key that I'm missing which continues to cause me to fail in this specific situation and it's one I struggle with a lot.
My game for the most part is pretty tight. I don't have trouble building attraction and getting girls into me. I'm never needy and very in control of every social situation. It's this whole transition from them being into me to getting physical that I seem to keep screwing up.
As she was leaving, I made a comment saying something about being the only one who wants to party all the time (and this girl is a hardcore partier, harder than most any I've known), and she made some sort of comment saying that it was because I had no life (and she knows literally nothing about me). I think this was a dig at me because I wasn't able to seal the deal with her as it appeared she was into it for a moment when getting close typing on the computer the first time. It felt like she was insulting me because we didn't hook up and she wanted to.
Please any advice about what my issue might be is much appreciated. Thank you.
About a month ago I hooked up with this 24 year old girl (9) for the first time (I'm 31). It was a very odd situation in that I met her via a mutual friend at about 3am on a Thursday night just before she was about to fly from San Diego to Cancun to go party at a music festival for 10 days and after hanging out for about 45 minutes she happened to ask me if I wanted to go and stay with her and her friend. After some deliberating I agreed and bought a plane ticket about an hour later.
I arrived in Cancun and met this girl and her friend at the airport then proceeded to go to the apartment she had rented. I didn't have to pay for anything.
We ended up spending about 2 hours in each other's presence most of which she completely ignored me and I played it very cool basically acting like I didn't give a shit and was just there for fun. She actually ditched me while we were out partying in Cancun and I went back to our apartment to sleep, only to be woken up by her a couple hours later and ended up fucking her. It was maybe the easiest lay I ever had. She woke me up, I just did everything natural putting on a movie and suggesting her to move onto the bed with me, then beginning with light touching and we were fucking like 5 minutes later.
Cutting out a huge part of the story, I left Cancun early because the girl literally had a schizophrenic episode. I hadn't seen her in about a month since then. We spoke on instant messenger a few brief times in between then and just tonight.
Tonight she comes over with her friend I went to Cancun with and our mutual friend that introduced us. At first she did her usual thing of ignoring me and acting pretty disrespectful/rude in general. I made it clear I wouldn't put up with her bullshit but maybe I didn't press hard enough. She made a comment at one point that she would leave and I said fine, but she didn't.
Anyways, 45 minutes or so passes by and she seems to be warming up to me again slightly. I do some light touching in her erogenous areas and try to slowly escalate in a smooth manner like I did the first time around. She isn't rejecting any of my touches but isn't reciprocating either. Some more time goes by and I finally get some alone time with her as my friend and his girl went outside to smoke. She is sitting in my computer chair and I am sitting on the bed. She goes on and on multiple times about her issues with her Spanish class and how she needs a tutor. She was strongly hinting to me that she wanted me to tutor her in Spanish but I had no interest in that at all so I kept ignoring her comments about it. She definitely was giving me a chance to seal the deal because we ended up talking in my bedroom just her and I for at least half an hour. At one point when it seemed natural, I went to grab her hand and she pulled away. She brought something up about Spanish translation and I told her to type it into the laptop computer which was on the bed next to me. She leaned over me and typed in whatever she was trying to type while I put my arm around her waste. She seemed slightly receptive of this at first but I didn't push at this point to make any kind of bold move because the first time we hooked up I didn't need to make any bold moves and it just happened more organically.
She eventually moved away from the bed and stopped leaning over me....then started mentioning something about some other dude she was staying with. I ignored this completely. I made a couple more attempts to try to get her back over to typing stuff into the laptop so I could be closer to her and the more I did that the less receptive she seemed to be as time went on. I can only guess that the first time she did this was my window and I missed it. Eventually too much time passed and she became more obviously frigid towards me.
My question is, what is my issue? This happens to me quite a bit where I feel like the girl is into me (why else is she blabbering on about bullshit for so long sitting in my bedroom at like 3am?) yet actively dismisses my under the radar type moves to establish a physical rapport. This has happened to me quite a few times with multiple different girls in similar situations.
I've previously tried many times in these types of situations to just go for the bold move and try to start making out with them but have been rejected every single time I've done that. I have had some success with the under the radar type moves but clearly I'm writing this post because I don't succeed consistently from it.
What am I doing wrong? I hooked up with this girl already previously and now she's in my bedroom (drunk and high on blow at 3am on a Monday) yet I am not able to seal the deal. I attempted escalating the vibe by giving her bedroom eyes. I altered between leaning in to her to get closer for touching and leaning away to get her to think she's losing me (though I struggle to understand how and when these moves are effective). The only thing I didn't do was make a bold physical move like just pull her to the bed and start making out with her. I feel like there's something key that I'm missing which continues to cause me to fail in this specific situation and it's one I struggle with a lot.
My game for the most part is pretty tight. I don't have trouble building attraction and getting girls into me. I'm never needy and very in control of every social situation. It's this whole transition from them being into me to getting physical that I seem to keep screwing up.
As she was leaving, I made a comment saying something about being the only one who wants to party all the time (and this girl is a hardcore partier, harder than most any I've known), and she made some sort of comment saying that it was because I had no life (and she knows literally nothing about me). I think this was a dig at me because I wasn't able to seal the deal with her as it appeared she was into it for a moment when getting close typing on the computer the first time. It felt like she was insulting me because we didn't hook up and she wanted to.
Please any advice about what my issue might be is much appreciated. Thank you.
