Why I keep my thoughts hidden - socialising vs hunting girls

[Virgin101]

Usually I make a thing about not talking to my pals about any plans or desires I have towards women. In a way, I might feel as though they don't deserve my wisdom. Or perhaps if I discussed such, I wouldn't be able to stop myself! I've realised that this has somehow led my friends to thinking that I'm far better with girls than what I actually might be. I guess it's because if I don't get with a girl, they're inclined to think it's I wasn't trying.

I have to admit though that I like the way they look up to me in this regard - which I've realised isn't a good thing. I should only need a certain small amount of approval from them, and should get my motivation elsewhere. But perhaps it's time to let this attitude go. Not necessarily to reveal anything to them but just to be willing to admit that I'm an amateur. This whole idea seems to have gone hand in hand with me becoming good at not revealing anything to people about my greatest desires in life. Doing so can go either way.

For example I was recently at a college ball & noticed that when you're there to get with girls, you're not really in socialising mode, like most of the others. I was on patrol... you move about at a lot more. A friend of mine, who I know has an eye for the ladies (and who also kind of struggles) asked "are you looking for a woman tonight?" Thinking back, I could have given him an honest answer, as opposed to trying to act mysterious... especially giving that with most of these guys anyway, it's kind of a "you know not to talk about it" kind of thing. He might even have been able to introduce me to someone.

If I wasn't on the move as much, and instead decided to talk to a bunch of friends, there'd be the possibility to introduce yourself to one of their friends. That night, the idea of stopping lone girls on the move (with the view in mind, that you'll never know what reaction you might get) didn't prove very successful - more so that at the end of the night, my thoughts were "know wonder I hesitate at that".

 

[Mystique]

Yea, I understand the situation you're in right now. You read so much from GC about women so at least you have some ideas concerning women. And probably when they talk about girls you analyse the situation and give them tips based on GC material rather than your experience per say. And probably you've been working on your fundamentals so people see you as cool and they believe you're good with women. But deep down inside, you know you're just a novice. Should you or should you not tell them? Well you can reveal that you're looking to strike up conversation with some hot chicks but you don't necessarily have to tell them you're into PU stuff. But it might still be useless telling them if their not socially savvy or naturals. If they were you could hit on chicks together (a wing man maybe), party or go to social gatherings together. Presently I'm trying to hang out more with naturals, socially savvy and the party going kinda guys. You should too. Plus you need to learn also to go out alone for the sole purpose of gaming. I've found out that it's a bad idea not to be social just because you're looking out for girls to chat up. You'll lose momentum. Remember Chase's article on how naturals meet and sleep with women. They talk with everyone. It's what we beginners need to work on. Cheers!

 

[Virgin101]

Yea, I understand the situation you're in right now. You read so much from GC about women so at least you have some ideas concerning women. And probably when they talk about girls you analyse the situation and give them tips based on GC material rather than your experience per say. And probably you've been working on your fundamentals so people see you as cool and they believe you're good with women. But deep down inside, you know you're just a novice. Should you or should you not tell them? Well you can reveal that you're looking to strike up conversation with some hot chicks but you don't necessarily have to tell them you're into PU stuff. But it might still be useless telling them if their not socially savvy or naturals. If they were you could hit on chicks together (a wing man maybe), party or go to social gatherings together. Presently I'm trying to hang out more with naturals, socially savvy and the party going kinda guys. You should too. Plus you need to learn also to go out alone for the sole purpose of gaming. I've found out that it's a bad idea not to be social just because you're looking out for girls to chat up. You'll lose momentum. Remember Chase's article on how naturals meet and sleep with women. They talk with everyone. It's what we beginners need to work on. Cheers!

Thanks Mystique, considering there wasn't even a question in my OP

I have to say, a part of me doesn't like the idea of hanging out with guys that are better than me. I like to act as we're equals, but yet know I'm a fraction ahead of my pals. It's probably be fine, but I wouldn't want to be the least coolest of the cool gang. Thinking about it, I'd nearly prefer the opposite scenario. One thing I'll say though, is that the way these pals of mine refer to me (on the odd occasion) can give me a temporary (unintended) boost of encouragement at the right moment.

Actually I don't read much GC. Most of the things I've learned, I consider to be unique to my own experiences. So even if I did reveal my thoughts, I wouldn't refer to any online community. It's a bit naive to think that just because you give good advice away, that it's going to change someone's habits. If I saw them to go on and make the same mistakes after such, I'd just feel like a fool for wasting my breathe thinking they were capable of change.