Your Belief System

[Richard]

Sup guys,

At our esteemed Light's advisal, I started to dive into the world of a certain known motivational expert/ self-help expert. I'd tell you who but I'd rather keep you guys guessing.

Anyway, I was first introduced to this idea by that mystery expert, and started to dive into research on what I'm about to tell you guys.

In the world of psychology, physiology, and neuroscience, there exist two schools of thought on a subject: the two schools being dualism and physicalism.

Dualism suggests that the body and mind act independently of one another, and physicalism (proven to be true) suggests the opposite, that the two definitely affect, influence, and react to one another.

Anyway, to the meat of this post: Your beliefs and attitudes affect your ability to do anything.

Have you ever heard the phrase, whether you think you can or can't, you're right? It's true.

Some guys on the site tell themselves they can't do something, or can't imagine themselves with some women they see, or create self-defeating attitudes or modalities. Well, when you tell yourself these things, you influence your entire body to make it so you can't do something. If you tell yourself you can't do something, you're telling your brain to shut down the region that makes it so you can do something.

Let's look at approach anxiety for personal examples:

You see a beautiful woman you'd love to approach, you tell yourself she's out of your league, or some equally negative drivel, then suddenly you feel yourself sweating a bit, your head bows down, you breathe more heavily, you feel the anxiety building, and you miss the opportunity. <--- Your body literally responds to the beliefs and attitudes you compose.

Let's look at another example: Abundance.

When you have an abundance mentality, in your head you tell yourself (even unconsciously) that you're confident, that women exist everywhere, so when you see one, it's no big deal to approach because that positivity in your brain is causing your body composition to portray confidence in every pore, or sexuality, or attraction, all things that women like to see in men.

Lesson of the day: Drop the negative beliefs, adopt new more confident belief systems, and live your motherfucking life!

Cheers,

-Richard

 

[PrettyDecent]

Rich, you've described in words my thoughts on what's 'possible'. I remember when I first started approaching, 9 months ago, I thought that talking to random women was a big deal, getting numbers were a huge deal, escalating with girls was a big deal, etc. At the time I just didn't think any of it was possible unless I had ridiculous "sexy" magic that only the gifted of men had.

The reality is, everything single accomplishment I've had so far was possible on Day 1, but there were a lot of mental limitations. Many preconceptions to be changed.

At the same time, beliefs are only half the equation. Intuition and skill are the other half. You need intuition as part of the art form of conversation, when to hit escalation windows, and to adapt to your current girls needs. And you need skill to create a good conversation, showcase yourself as an interesting person, and smooth transition points.

Though, that doesn't detract from the point made by this post. I have a pretty decent (lol) intuition and skill, but if my internal belief/confidence is off, I'm fucked (at least for a little while).

A practical point could be made that social momentum temporarily changes your beliefs (you're in action, talking to people/women) and all you need at that point is the intuition and skill. But even that's made easier by your beliefs enhancing your fundamentals.

Thanks for the post, Rich.

~Nick

 

[Richard]

Nick,

Excellent points you bring up.

I'm at odds on how to best to respond, so I'm just going to type By the way, I'm not disagreeing with anything you're saying, just wanted to build off individual points you made haha.

Anyway, what I've learned from my own experience and what's highlighted by numerous conversation/self-help type books is that everything is ran by your mind. Everything is given meaning by the stories we create in our mind (so to speak), and nothing is given value until we place it within a story. A woman comes home at midnight and is tired, you could create the story that she's cheating, or could create the story that she was out shopping, then you act in accordance with that story.

At the same time however, stories are a modality of the brain, and they are a means we as humans have to interpret and process information. Think back to any substantial event in your life, something was going on in your mind, could've been you talking to yourself in your head, could've been colors in your head, feelings in your head; those are your sub-modalities. Now, when you're comfortable and calm your intuition and conversation skill are usually piqued, and your calmness and comfort is a state of mind that you can create.

If in your mind, you tell yourself something in a soothing and easygoing voice, then you're going to feel calm and comfortable. If you see the color blue in your head, or green, or purple you're also likely to be calm.

The skill you have in conversation/intuition probably exists somewhere outside your PUA life like talking to your family or friends, conversation seems to flow naturally with no problems. Why is it then, that those skills you have with friends disappear when a beautiful woman is around: your mind is influencing you, and it's controlling you, instead of you controlling it.

When you're calmly flowing through words with friends, modalities in your mind are there as well (like me, when I talk to friends and feel comfortable, I hear an upbeat and cheery voice in my head as things go on), and that brain process puts me in a calm mood. So, when a person recreates that modality consciously, you recreate those results.

So, if I saw a beautiful woman, and consciously changed the voice that I was hearing in my head from shallow/negative, to that upbeat and cheery one, I'll be able to utilize those social skills, and intuition as I would with friends.

Felt like I went off on a bit of a tangent here, but, the point is: your brain runs everything, and you can control it to produce results you want